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Day Nine


All this week, we’ve been doing emotionally draining scenes. Each day, I come to work and put myself into the skin of this guy who’s lost everything in his life, and is struggling to find meaning in the aftermath.

Now, when I get this tired, I suppose I could “fake it,” but that comes across on the screen (go watch Kevin Costner or Tom Cruise, if you’re want an example of what I’m talking about...or if you really want to torture yourself, sit through “Glitter.”)

So, “faking it” not being an option, I have to take time before each scene to focus and immerse myself in pain and grief, confusion and despair. After 5 days of this, I am really, really tired and totally emotionally drained. I understand what people mean when they’ve suffered a great loss, and they just can’t cry any more, and it’s getting harder and harder as the day goes on to find the energy to bring this guy to life, but there is no other option, so I dig deep and Just Do It(tm).

The crazy thing is, even though I have to keep putting myself through the emotional wringer, I am still having a great time on this picture. We made it across Donner Pass some time this morning, and we haven’t looked back.

The crew has been so jovial today, and there has been much laughter, and I’ve faced an additional challenge: leaving the mirth and joy of geeking out about D&D with the boom man, and geeking out about Final Cut Pro with the first AC, to plunge back into the emotional depths of this character. It’s a welcome change from yesterday, when I felt like we were sitting atop a powder keg.

As I write this, we are finishing up the last scene of the day (fortunately not a gut-wrencher, so I can relax and catch my breath by writing for a little bit before they call me in). It just feels wonderful to be so close to finishing up a great week of work.

I’m so grateful for this weekend, and I’m even more grateful to have a role which is so demanding, I really need the weekend to recharge.

Have a great one, everybody. Hope to see some of you at the gallery opening tomorrow.

Comments

I'm glad that you've kept us updated from day to day. Thanks for sharing.

Damn, I thought I would be first`!!

Wow, it really sounds like you are putting your heart and soul into this movie, I can't wait to see it. Hopefully there will be more roles like this in the future (though not for a while, that would have to be exausting if you had to do it every month or something). Perhaps this will be your 'Big Break' as an adult actor, or perhaps the steping stone to it. From what it sounds like you really didn't want to stop acting (perhaps just a break from it (this break not to be confused with 'big break' mentioned above)).

ROCK ON!! :D

I can't wait to see this movie!!! And look how close I am to the top!! I have never been this close to number one! YES!

Oh man, I hope you yourself didn't sit through "Glitter"... otherwise I know where you're getting that pain and grief, confusion and despair from...

First of all thanks for sharing your days on the set with us, that is really cool. I don't know where you find the energy to do it, so I my hat is off to you on that. Second of all, have a great weekend. Spend some time with the family that will bring you back and relax you!

Oh wow! I might actually have someone to geek out with about Final Cut Pro. Hehe... maybe in the soapbox one day. Riiight. ;)

Art imitates life imitates life making art.

abuse it.


*I'm drunk and this post like the others are skewing off on an abstract plane*

It sound like the movie is going great. Cant wait to see it! I hope you have the weekend off, so you can get some rest, you deserve it. A lot of people don't realize what an actor/actress has to do when they work. Thru your web site, we can see what actors have to go thru, from going to auditions, finding out if you got the role, and the eventual process of working on the film. I'm glad we as tv veiwers and movie watchers can see the hard work that has to be done when doing film and TV. I hope you have a great weekend, and enjoy your family, before monday comes around again.

Wil --
This is just fascinating for us spectators. Thanks for sharing this experience --
Eva

Wil,
It looks like the people on your set were in the true halloween spirit, minus someone turning into the hulk or a warewolf. Well it is good to see you have rediscovered the true meaning of weekends. Have a good one.

FG

Wow Wil, I didn't know you played D&D. Me too! I knew I liked you for a reason!

You actors are a breed apart, sir. A breed apart....

Hi Justine here,
Yeah anyway sorry this is sooooo off the subject...but that John Doe thing maybe i missed it but would someone PLEASE clue me in did you/wil get the part?

Its great to hear how your an actor once again.Though alongside the show "Arena",it just hasnt been the same without ya Wil.Looking forward to seeing your movie soon.

You know.. not to be an ass, but...i dunno it doesnt sound so amazing, being a plex movie...but cheers anyhow....maybe you'll grace the big screen in a film again...perhaps....shit you always have that train scene though, god bless, Chicken Tits.

Final Cut Pro is cool! Now if only I could afford a legal copy of it. Make demonic, possession sounds. Must NOT watch Glitter! *Hams up like William Shatner* Can't take the torture of it. I WILL not watch Glitter! What the hell is that show about on cable where Mr. Shatner's doing crappy interviews with people. I can't believe they still pay him.

I know I know a bit off topic. Anyway, have a groovy weekend & remember to toss your Jack O Lantern before it turns into a mess of gray mold.

Every time I see that "Glitter" is on HBO or something, all I can do is laugh my ass right off. What a waste of film.

Talk about faking it...the guy who played the lead in that movie...he was so very sad. On so many levels.

Have a great weekend. Go play with the kids and then tell us about it.

All this talk about the movie is just a plot to get us curious about it so we'll see it, right? Well, you sold me. It's sounding great and I am looking forward to seeing how the work you've told us about translates onto the screen.

Enjoy your weekend. Rest and spend some time with your family. You deserve it after this week.

http://www.startledfrog.com/beretwearingelitist/

Sounds really great, Wil. I can't wait to see the finished product!!!

:)

Scott

Glad you're enjoying this! Even though it's a bit trying at times. Just do your best and we know it'll be great. Cheers and all that crap. ;)

Well, I hope everything's worth the effort...I'm sure it's gonna turn out great!

Thanks for sharing your day-to-day life on the set with us! It's fascinating, insightful, and gutsy.

Me an' Brotha Tom gonna whoop yo ass, boy!

D&D lasted about a month or two in my teen times -- after a friend lent me the AD&D books, my fellow gamers and I went out and dropped $65 on the three books, afterwards it was all AD&D.

We'd save up and get a new $20 book every so often, MM 2, Fiend Folio, Deities and Demigods, what not.

Until GURPS. Then we bought 2 more books, "Space" and "Magic," and that was it. GURPS GURPS GURPS. You know, I never did do that adventure module I always wanted to, kind of "Illuminati" with bizarre and supernatural FBI agents like Dale Cooper, Clarisse Starling, Fox Mulder, and Frank Black.

fnord.

You know, those TSR books had a funny smell to them, like there was tobacco in the ink, or some TSR employees were smokin' sumthin' in the warehouse. Does anybody else remember that smell?

Later.

man, as' right Brotha Costna! Get in da ring, Wesley, cuz Big Tom done set his PHAZAH on WHOOPASS!!!

man, I tell ya, don't go there, cuz' we gonna mess ya donkeys in da ring so bad even YO FLAPJACK MAMMY in sick bay can't cure ya wit dat magic doodad she use ta fix dem achin' prune-heads or whateva.

man, one time Brotha Costa buy this little puppy dog, an' he kill it. No reason, he jes' kill it. See, we go buck wile like dat! Evah see DANCES WIT WOLVES? He jes' like a WILE INJUN so don't mess with my brotha! An' we gonna buy a new puppy dog, an' name it Wesley!

Man ah got two big balls a' buttah, but dat ain't the alla' it. Brotha Costna got FOUR big balls a' buttah, an' dey like a wreckin' crew on No Doz, boy! On No Doz!

WORD

Hi Wil, interesting comments on day to day life on a movie set. I have worked on a couple of independent projects myself and I know how stressful and long the days can become. However, I have to take some issue with your comments about Costner and Cruise. This seems a little unfair, you have no idea where they are drawing their performances from. What comes across on the screen to me is that Kevin Costner is just not that good of an actor and Tom Cruise never quite ceases to be Tom Cruise, doesn't mean they are on auto-pilot thought. Just my two cents.

Thank you, Mr Cruise, for those incredibly gay and light hearted comments.

Costner really, really seriously disappointed me in Prince of Thieves. Good script, wonderful supporting cast, but I always felt like he was walking through the role, just mouthing the words. He brought what would have been one of my favorite versions of Robin Hood down by several notches. I've never enjoyed him in a movie since. My two cents.

isn't it funny how so many in the "public" view kc and tc as "IT" (should that be TM'd?!!) wil's comment about them just made me wonder if those who live on the other side of the 4th wall consider what they've achieved as making it or just as cheeseballs. i'm guessing i know wil'd perspective... just wonder by how many in the acting dimension it's shared by...

"...or if you really want to torture yourself, sit through 'Glitter.'"

Okay, not that's just MEAN. You wouldn't *really* want people to do that, would you...?

Wil, I've enjoyed reading you posts but I would just like to say that I like Glitter and would gladly sit through it!

Rose @}--}--}

Man, y'all jes don't KNOW the half a' it, do ya? Ah'm so jive da actah, ah can sit down, and then sit down again once I already sittin' down!

Why, ah can bed mah ho's so many time, dey turn from a l'il girl into a l'il boy! Man, ah got so much magic in mah magic peppah, I pee da "P" outta DOCTAH PEPPAH!

Why, yo momma takes eggs, cracks 'em over her head, an' throws em' in da toilet bowl!

Why, ah take da "A" outta Albert an' stick it in "E" An' what doezzat spell? L-BERT-E, Mah brotha in Brooklyn who razin' NEW YORK like Citizen Kane, mo'fo! He got a hand full'a beavah and a truckload a' ass, an' Y'ALL ain't gettin' any!

Why, ah take down mah pants, an' y'all know what ah see? WILE-E! WILE-E!

Git down, honkey! We got plastic sheets an' rubbah raincaps, je-e-e-e-e-e-e-st fo' you.

--KEVIN COSTNER.

Have you ever thought of getting a moderator? To filter out the crud and B.S? Food for thought..

Or am I missing something? Let me know??? The words and stuff that guy was saying kinda threw me off....

As a former theatre student and a current gaming geek, I'm wondering if you ever find yourself putting a lot of emotional work into a gaming/roleplaying character. I'm always interested to know what hits people's 'acting' buttons -- some people are great at LARP, using costuming and improv and their entire bodies, some prefer tabletop face-to-face RP, where they can use their face and their voice, and some would rather RP online, where all their reactions are purely written. Do you just see it all as playing a character, or is one easier than the others for a specific reason? Just curious.

not that I'm a fan of Tom Cruise or kevin costner actually the guy is like a shot of nyquil puts your right to sleep BUT I think the term "faking" is generally refered to as "acting"

o god "Glitter" was like the worst movie ever, sitting through that was torture Wil lol.

I'm truely ashamed to say that I have enjoyed your acting both in movies and in STNG. After visiting your site and seeing how truely "Hollywood left" you have apparently become, I'm stunned.

The banner regarding the war against Iraq further increases my shame at having thought of you in a more reasonable light.

Eventually, I suspect a time will come when the crushing weight of reality and responsibility will change the tone of your politics.

In the mean time, I'll place you in the category of Tom Cruise, and George Clooney and avoid any pictures with their participation regardless of their awards.

Wade

dude, if you have to use their politics as reasons to avoid "pictures" with clooney or cruise, well...I can think of other reasons to avoid them

Is Wade on drugs?

from the BBC news site:

"Cruise also spoke out in support of the US president.

'Personally, I don't have all the information President Bush has,' said the star.

'But I believe Saddam has committed many crimes against humanity and his own people.'"

Diversity in opinion is one of the things that makes this country great. It's one thing to disagree, but it's another to criticize someone for having an opinion and supporting it. I for one was at the Chicago peace rally because I believed that was one way for me to express my opinion. Wil Wheaton inserts informative links on his website to support his opinion that he evidently feels passion for. If we as a nation cannot demand that the citizens and politicians argue all sides of an issue, rather than blindly cry out "Bomb Iraq" or "Make love, not war" then we as a nation have disintegrated into a singular viewpoint...and there is a word for that people, and that word is fascism. If the sole superpower of the world cannot back up it values by weighing every possible solution to a problem (that is, to fire a laser guided bomb, or to negotiate) but instead we must rush to judgment and bomb bomb bomb because we let fear dictate our lives and to cloud our vision as to the world we want our children to grow up in, then may God have mercy on us all.

Maybe I haven't been reading very thoroughly, but I've missed the actual NAME of this movie... :(

Maybe I haven't been reading very thoroughly, but I've missed the actual NAME of this movie... :(

Dances With Wolves is high on my list of great movies. Costner was excellent in that. There are some other performances that he seems to go through the motions to get the paycheck. Sometimes I think that Cruise has the potential to be very good. Sometimes he just comes off as an average actor with good looks. Anyway, thought that might have been over generalizing to some extent. Anyway, way to hang in there and give all you can give.

With all due respect to your acting abilities (because I've long felt you are a genuine and original talent) and your generosity vis a vis your web site ...

I'm not sure exactly how you can conclude that Costner and Cruise are "faking it," but it seems fairly certain your perceptions are fueled and colored either by A) an elitist and uninformed dismissal of all popular acting (which is understandable, given the huge -- though mostly deserved -- popularity of these two performers), or B) a petulant, defensive and almost debilitating lack of confidence in your own abilities (less comprehensible, but also understandable, given your own publicly voiced disdain for the "flavors of the month" who garner the lion's share of the best roles today).

Your frustration with the general lack of depth in this generation's crop of 20-mil-per-film megastars is warranted in most cases (we all know asshats like Vin Diesel are essentially smirks and biceps masquerading as actors); in the case of Cruise and Costner, however, the impatience seems a bit strident and glib.

Sorry Wil, but these two gents aren't faking their craft any more than Tom Hanks does -- or any more than you are -- despite their box office appeal. Like Hanks, they're both leading men with enormous range (Cruise moreso than Costner), who choose, unlike a Spacey or Malkovich or Pacino, to retain much of their real-life personas regardless of the role. They don't lose themselves in characters, for the most part, because they don't need to. They're skilled enough through whatever freakish gifts God gave them to fully reveal character without sacrificing identity -- and this is a rare and marvelous skill found in only a handful of actors in each generation. These are movie stars, first and foremost, not Method Actors or Grand Artistes. There should be no stigma in that, and to dismiss them as thespian frauds is at best churlish -- at worst, ignorant and critically indefensible.

Sure, Costner has had his share of howlers, but he's also turned in nuanced, often stunning, peformances in films such as FIELD OF DREAMS, BULL DURHAM, TIN CUP and DANCES WITH WOLVES.

And you're making a grave mistake by failing to overlook Cruise's early work. Because I know you've watched him grow from the one-dimensional pretty boy of RISKY BUSINESS, TAPS and TOP GUN to the accomplished and mesmerizing lead of films like EYES WIDE SHUT, MAGNOLIA, RAIN MAN, BORN ON THE FOURTH OF JULY and THE COLOR OF MONEY.

Of course, you're entitled to your opinion -- and, after all, this is your site to say what you wish. I just feel you're being a tad unfair to Mr. Costner and Mr. Cruise, and well, I think you doth protest too much.

hey.. i love this site.. i think its cool how you write for us to know what's going on in your life. i've liked you for a long time and i was wondering if me and you could email towards one another..... of course as you can see my email is tootie_vampiregal@hotmail.com.... (dont' ask) lol.. well i hope you get the chance to email me... later.....

I kept coming back here, no posts from Wil, no posts from anybody, so went to images.google.com and browsed 22 pages of photos of Wil!

See now, mah brothah KEN knows whassup with the pics an' flix man, an' ah tell ya what's mo, he got a pocket full o' nine, jes waitin in dah cornah fo dem ho's can't act a damn sneeze fo' jimmy, an' a heist o' cracked oats, son!

Man, this one time brothah KEN go into church wit alla' dem green pot lamp, an' kick dat preist silly, an' say point dat gun at the baby Jesus an' say,

"C'MON OUT GOD, OR THE KID GETS IT!"

An' God say, "..."

An' he go RATTA TATTA TAT at da crucifix, an' wha-BAM!

An' dat's da jizz fo' today, so don't front on BROTHAH KEN!!!

-TOM CRUISE

-1 redundant

I agree, Wil. The only time I saw a performance where Tom Cruise might have felt emotion was Rain Man and that was a LONG time ago.

Oh yeah, Angelwwolf? You are forgiven, and your penance is:

- 20 "Hail Wesleys"
- 10 "Episodes of ST:TNG "you freak.
- 300 "I am a frothing bootlicker who kisses Wil's white ass because I have no ability to think on my owns"

ouch, low blow. love tom cruise.

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