WIL WHEATON dot NET: 1.5

Today we found out that fellow actor Jonathan Brandis has died, possibly by suicide. I wanted to take this opportunity to recognize Wil and his ability to adapt and to change over the years; whatever may be his particular challenges and struggles in his life. Many actors, young and old fall by the wayside over the years as they deal with many different things in their life such as peer pressure, self-esteem and self worth. When Wil feels down and out or depressed he has this web site to post his feelings, worries or concerns. When he is happy and cheerful he shares that with us as well. Being so grounded must be a testament to the love and affection that he gets from his Mother & Father, Aunt Val, his Wife, Family and Friends, in addition to the support and friendship that all of his readers bestow on him and his work. I wonder if Wil would be a very different person if it were not for these people in his life and the fact that, on his web site, he is so open and forthcoming about his thoughts, feelings and concerns, on this day-to-day, week-by-week basis. Don’t Stop Wil, Don't Stop Writing. Don't Stop Dreaming. We need you and your words as much as you need us (readers). As human beings, we all need each other. Wil was, is and will continue to be a survivor. He Bends like the Willow Tree, he is stable, flexible and enduring. Is that why his mother calls him Willow?

I wondered if you'd heard about this. A few days ago I was convinced it was a hoax, there was a similar rumour way back. Apparently, not a hoax.

I don't want to speculate on how he felt at the time. Frankly, it's none of my damn business. I do know it's a bloody shame that his life ended like that.

i heard about this a day or so ago...terribly sad...i thought he had a pretty good character on that deepquest show...
and the new project he was involved in was a starring role for him, with a cast that includes Martin Mull and Fred Willard (how cool is that?)
anyhow, i think it's a damn shame, and he will be missed...
also glad you turned right, took the stairs and made the healthy choice wil..

its a nice world, and infinitely nicer with you in it.

cheers
tyson

Funny thing, I saw this last night, and said to my wife Jennifer "I'm really glad this wasn't Wil, I'm sure he felt like Jonathan at different times in his life."

Looking forward to the next book Wil!

definitely glad that we all have guardian angels such as our family and friends.

This really hit me hard. I liked him on SeaQuest DSV. He was much too young to die.

And we are glad you took the stairs...

however I think you have one of those personalities that would have allowed you to survive that transition from childhood without becoming a drugged, drunken, suicidal wash-up either way you took.

As they used to say, "keep it real," - shoot, I don't know, do they still say that?

another obscure reference to 80's music... you can't pass it up can you? ;)

I must say that I was shocked to see that. He hadn't been around much lately, but seemed to well-adjusted enough. I remember him first in The Stepfather (Wil wasn't the only one to do an 80's horror flick). Sad to see someone die so young. On a mostly unrelated note, I saw Corey Feldman on Howard Stern last night doing some sort of battle of the bands thing. Hilarity ensued and both he and Howard's bands were godawful. Corey was singing some song about being a former child actor. Wil's autobiographical fiction is better than Corey's songwriting, that's for sure.

I actually think it is a little presumptious to assume it has anything to do with having been a child actor, an actor, a struggling artist or what have you. Many people suffer who were never actors. We have no idea really to what demons haunted him.

yeah, I used to joke about Jonathan's character on SeaQuest, but I always like him and his character.....he seemed like an actor who had a lot going for him, even after SeaQuest....and even if he didn't....well, regardless, it's sad when someone kills themself and sad when it's someone so young. it also p*sses me off, because my cousin was 25 when he was killed and he had no choice in the matter. Jonathan had a choice, and he chose wrong, IMHO.

It is odd how people perceive things...

I recognized the name Jonathan Brandis right away when I read the headlines on CNN, of course there was no photo so I had to google him. and I immediatly rememberd him for some of his work I had seen over the years.

I find it odd though that some people would see this and think of Wil. I mean I know Wil as well as the next guy, we go way back... we are the same age, I watched his movies and telivision appearanes then lost track of him until I stumbled across WWDN...

but after getting to know Wil, the real Wil, only from what he writes here for all to read and one personal email from him (I felt privlidged to receive - by the way) I was suprized that some people even Wil himself thought that if things were a little different that could have been our Wil.

I dont think so personally.

Again, I dont know Wil, but I think I can look back at some of Wil's early career and see that Wil would have never ended up like Jonathan or some of the other people who fit the teen star profile.

Even look at some of his co-stars from Stand By Me, Feldman and Phoneix are prime examples... Peers and really screwed up, Drugs and alcohol, rehab and death...

Sometimes you have to cut your losses and walk away.

in my mid - late 20's I had a nice little government job in the field I had JUST finnished studying in college, and in the blink of an eye, governments changed and I was out on my ass!

I had to Wait on tables for 2 years! and finally got into IT, and am Kinda working in my field and getting paid VERY well to write this for you'all :)

But I liken that to what Wil is doing...

Hell, if a great acting gig came up he would jump, but for now he is seeing what else he can do, he is paying the bills and has a great family from the sounds of it...

Also, I think that is what Wils' Father was so upset about... Pride yes, but relief that he and his mom had raised such a wonderful-level-well-adjusted Man... and that they dont have to worry about stuff like that with Wil, NOT "Phew it wasn't our son".

I am very sorry for the family of Jonathan Brandis...

But I never thought that would be our Wil, that I and many others like to think we know so well!

(*disclaimer: I made alot of assumptions about Wil in this, in my mind they are right and on queue, but if I am wrong and Wil is not the person I perceive and like to think I know in some small way, I am sorry... very sorry in fact.)

Wow, I thought you mentioned at one time you were friends with him? My bad. Despite any correlations between parts played, you were two individuals with your own goals, ideas and personalities. It drives me nuts when people start comparing other actors to ones that have passed with comments like "it could have been him". They really should give you a bit more credit.

Kel

RE: Coulda been Wil
I thought the same thing, actually. As a fan of your site and of "Dancing Barefoot" I'm certainly glad you took whichever directions you did.

I'm so sad! I really liked him, and was so excited when I saw him in Hart's War. That's just terrible this happened. Thank goodness you took the right turn in life, Wil.

I won't presume to say that I know you well, but my perception based on my limited p.o.v. is that you aren't and wouldn't have been likely to go the way Jonathan Brandis did. While it's clear that you're prone to the same depressions and self-doubt as anyone, your writing shows what I perceive as a basic level-headedness and love of life. These, combined with your apparent sense of personal responsibility make the odds that you would suicide just about zero.

I'm sorry he lost that battle, but it's one you win every day, every time your wife and children look to you with love.

Remember that, Mr. Wheaton: you're a winner. You're a success. You're one of the cool kids.

I saw the news about J and thought of Wil right away. Not because I catagorized the two in the same place, but because I had to wonder what Wil thought when something like that happened. Wil went through a lot of what J went through and yet he is in a much better place now. (Or at least that is the appearance he gives in his writing) I wondered what Wil's thoughts were from someone who had been there, but seems to have a better take on life itself. In response to another writer, we don't know that the business was what caused the suicide, but come on, how often do we hear about things like this and it is blamed on the fact that the person could not make that child/adult actor transition? So Wil, in addition to millions of others, I am glad you went left instead of right and got on those stairs. I am sorry you ever had to feel the pain and the depression, I am glad that you have Anne and so many others in your life. I am sorry for anyone who feels that lost and alone and I hope that they can find just one glimmer of hope to keep them going that extra moment to get them to the next.

I think it's so aweful that that happened. I've known too many people that have commited suicide, and it's the most aweful thing to have to deal with. It always seems to me that the pain that anyone who commits suicide is dealing with must be enormous, and that simiply puts the value of life all that much higher in my opinion. Life may not always be the easiest or the most pleasant. But only the strongest make it to the top of the mountain so that they can come down again. I have the utmost respect for anyone who can live through the pain that almost everyone has to live through at one point or another in the course of their life. I know how aweful it is to have anyone you care about kill themself. I'm so glad we still have you though.

This news hit me really hard aswell. I can see your point on how similar you two were. When I told my friends & family about this the instant reaction I got was "Who?". This upset me even more.

I'm glad that there are people out there to remember him, and I'm glad there are people like you, Wil, who sympathise.

It also makes me happy to tell others if they respond "Who?" to your name, that I can say you're doing very well for yourself, instead of saying "That guy, from that show, back then".

I don't know if it's been said but I think it's presumuous to assume he killed himself because of Hollywood pressures (ala "I know how hard it is to make the transition from child to adult actor. I know how merciless Hollywood is. I know the pain, frustration, and depression that he must have felt.")
Maybe he was a loony? Maybe he was on drugs?
Maybe a lot of things.

Wil,

With all due respect...c'mon.

There is no way that, as they say "there go I, but for the grace of God..." You are a fighter. You just have low self esteem. And you have always had hope in your life.

You are close to your family. Many of us have little or no family left due to a million causes. You have, by all accounts had and kept some good friends over your lifetime. And even though you may have taken these things for granted at times, you have benefitted from the strength of those bonds, even when it may not have been apparent except within hindsight.

You are blessed and talented and lucky. So let's have no more of this gloomy talk.

As for Jonathan Brandis, we can all give a moment of condolence to him because, for whatever reasons, he went into a dark place that he never got out of. But there is a difference between he and you by far.

To be honest, I had no idea why people were comparing the two of you at all besides similar career paths.

Just keep on doing what YOU have to do to get by. P.S. we're obviously all behind you (as if that had to be said yet again- but Im sure its still nice to hear it!)

I still can't believe it... and I am sadder about it than I expected. But then again, I never expected it. The worst is to think in how much pain he must have been to make a choice like that... and that he was alone with it...
He was too young, and he just was... the wrong person...
It just feels like it isn't real...

1) IMDb has it listed that he died on November 12th. Does anyone know why this is?

2) What is it with the age 27 that so many actors/musicians die?

It was just 10 years ago when a Phoenix was lost(then by accident)but sad none the less.The important thing is when these things happen reflect and be greatful for the good these people have given to us all and strive to help others along their paths.-SR

I used to be a HUGE fan of Jonathan Brandis and watched SeaQuest just because he was on it. I still have all of the episodes on tape somewhere. This is really sad.

I don't know why, but I feel vaguely guilty for plastering my bedroom with pullouts of him from those horrid pre-teen star mags. What a stigma to try and escape from.

I'm not sure why I'm posting this other than that I wished to express my sadness at hearing that Jonathan Brandis is gone, most like of his own will.

Being a product of the 80's, I grew up adoring those infamous blue eyes and that ruffled blonde hair. I had several posters and newspaper clippings of him taped to the walls of my bedroom.

I will also admit that I watched the movies 'LadyBugs' and 'Neverending Story II' so many times that I later had to replace both VHS copies, not to mention that I recorded e-v-e-r-y s-i-n-g-l-e episode of SeaQuest DSV when it first aired (and I've never been one prone to frequent recording of anything on TV.)

I think a lot of young girls at the time were completely smitten with Jonathan, just like they were with Wil. Maybe none quite so much as me, but then again I have a very biased point of view in this matter. ;)

It is a shame that Jonathan couldn't find the strength to overcome whatever it was that drove him to taking his own life, but I will always remember him fondly for being a large part of my childhood fantasies (I STILL want to work on a D.S.V. *laughs*).

One last thing: I've seen a lot of comments dismissing Wil's statement about knowing how consuming the pressures of Hollywood can be and how they might lead some to thoughts of suicide.

Hell, one doesn't have to live or work in Hollywood to know that during times of extreme change or disappointment even the smallest of doubts can eat away at even the strongest of characters. While I won't speculate on why Jonathan might have killed himself, I give credit to Wil for putting those feelings out there, even if not in his usually loquacious style.

I too am glad that he stayed the course long enough to see himself through not only the rough spots of growing up, but the rough spots of growing up in, and out, of the Hollywood spotlight.

He too has earned a special spot on my Life's wall of memories, and every day that spot seems to glow more brightly.

I was horrified to learn this earlier this afternoon and yes my thoughts eventually strayed to "If only he had managed to hang like Wil has".

My own memorial to Jonathan: http://ponder.megalion.org/archives/individual/2003_11/000683.html

Until the toxicology reports are in, the final results of the autopsy, any assumption about why Jonathan apparently commited suicide is jumping the gun. It may very well have nothing to do with having been a child star, or the direction his life was going. Swirling around the rumor mill is that he was taking Accutane--a medication known to cause suicidal depression. Or it could have been the result of any number of other medications with similar side effects. Or maybe he was just fed up with other aspects of his life. In spite of what the Paul Petersons of the world would love everyone to think, it may have absolutely nothing whatsoever to do with childhood stardom. Though it might be worse to think the poor guy was done in by an acne treatment...

RIP JB

I remember Jonathan as a very down-to-earth character, and even though talking to him dates back about 7 or 8 years, I'm not so convinced that his death has anything to do with him being a child actor and not being able to handle his vanishing fame. His best movies came after Seaquest, and he was GREAT on "Her last chance"... and he never really stopped working, either. There are other, more important things in life that can lead to the decision of comitting suicide. It's a big loss and I don't think we would honor him very much if we keept on speculating about it. Letting him rest in peace is the only thing we can do for him now, so let's do that !

I dunno. I mean, I was in a band once and made a couple of records for RCA. Toured with some bigger names like Marilyn Manson, and had my mug in magazines like Rip and Hit Parader. Not even an Nth degree of what dudes like Wil have gone through, but it's so damned unreal. Even worse, is when it's over. When I read a soldier's comments on returning home from Vietnam, and that sense of unbelonging they describe...I think I can understand that pretty well. And if I can, then I can also imagine what it would be like for someone like Jon Brandis. Or Wil. I tip my hat to Wil...and take it off for Jon.

Being a former "employee" of the industry, I know how mean and cut throat it can be. All industries have egos but the Entertainment Industry seems to attract more of them and they are worse. I know it is harder on the "above-the-line" people because perception plays a big part in it. (You haven't worked in three years=you're career is washed up) Since Jonathan Brandis started as a child actor, it was probably harder for him to adjust since "the industry" was his life and reality. A lot depends on the company that you keep. Are your friends and family grounded and keep you in reality? I've seen the alternative and it isn't pretty and the results can be potentially devastating. That's not to say that this is why Jonathan Brandis died. I'm talking about the industry in general.

Rest in Peace, Jonathan Brandis. We'll miss you!

I was madly in love with JB when I was in high school. My walls were covered with posters from those cheesy teen mags, I had every JB movie on video (still do somewhere), and I recorded every single episode of seaQuest DSV (they're somewhere too). I was very upset to hear that JB has died, my prayers are with his parents and friends.

[url]http://www.eonline.com/News/Items/0,1,12971,00.html[/url]Just a sad loss. He was my age..though I am about two weeks older. He still had so much he could have contributed in this world.

oops try this link:
http://www.eonline.com/News/Items/0,1,12971,00.html

Damn. About half my friends had crushes on him at one point or another. Thanks for letting us know - he'll be missed.

I am deeply saddened by Jonathan's death. A few days ago, I randomly started looking up websites for him. For absolutely no reason. Now I see why. As impossible as it sounds, some part of me knew he was dead. I know, I never met him. But he did touch my life. As you do too, Wil.

For all the people commenting that they don't think he killed himself due to the pressure of his career: I read that his family said he was taking Accutane, which has been linked to depression and suicide. Of course, none of the mainstream news sources are reporting this, so take it with whatever grain of salt you will...

First it was Elliot Smith (did the music for Good Will Hunting among), now Jonathan Brandis. I had a HUGE crush on him back in the day. I loved Sea Quest (the first season). I always wished the writers of Star Trek could write Wesley as well as the character Lucas was written.

I'm still in shock.

Wil, thank you for sharing your feeling and words about Jonathan Brandis, I somehow feel that he never knew his work made a difference in people's lives, and just maybe if someone had told him of his worth, it might have turned out differently.
I'm just glad we have the opportunity to tell you Wil, how much your words and acting mean to us.
Keep on truckin!

Now I'm even more depressed. Toy Soldiers is now playing on Encore & I'm reminded of Shawn Phelan, who also died young. He didn't kill himself, it was a car accident.

When I read the post today about Jonathan Brandis, I couldn't believe it. I had to read it several times for it to sink in. What a truely tragic waste of a human life. How horrible it must have felt for him that the only way to end his suffering was to cease to exist. My thoughts go out to his family and friends. It struck me that the last time I felt this way about an actor's death was when River Phoenix died, 10 years and not quite a month ago. I remember my college roomate and I talking about was how much we had loved watching his movies and how sad it was. Ironically, we watched Seaquest that night with Jonathan Brandis and wondered if he would be the next big thing. Unfortunately, he was not. How sad that he too will be known as one more child actor who tragically died too young. I'm glad that I stumbled onto the WWDN site and have gotten to "know" Wil through his writing (loved Dancing Barefoot by the way), much more so than when I used to watch him on TNG as a geeky teenager myself (only watched it because of him really). His honesty and humor have served him well in his varied career path, and with the support of friends and family, will help him cope with whatever life throws at him. In a way we've all grown up with him together and he makes all of us self proclaimed geeks proud. Wil, keep up the good work. We've come to expect great things from you.

I remember my best friend loved Seaquest and had the biggest crush on Jonathan Brandis. but Seaquest was on at the same time as Lois and Clark and my family just liked Superman much more. (that and I've always liked guys with dark hair. Jonathan Brandis was pretty good-looking for a blond guy, but.....no comparison to Dean Cain, even when I was 16!) I haven't talked to my best friend from high school in a few years, I wonder how she's taking this.

All I can think is "there's a new addition to the 27 club and it's a shame." We don't even know if Brandis committed suicide for sure yet, but it's probably that. He wasn't on drugs, it appears and life wasn't *that* bad. What a downer.

Apparently, Jonathan Brandis hung himself, if the report is at all true. More here: http://www.eonline.com/News/Items/0,1,12971,00.html

I have to admit I was also one of those people that had all the Bop and Big Bop pictures of Jonathan Brandis, Joey Lawrence, New Kids on the Block, River, and yes Wil even you on my wall. Now all those memories are safely packed away in a box in my garage. It's very sad, I tuned into Seaquest everyweek and had every line in Ladybugs memorized and begged my mom to take me to the car show that Jonathan was at so I could get an autograph and picture. BUT beyond all that I think the really saddest part is that he was only 4 years older than I am. He was still in the prime of his life and it's truly sad that he was in that deep dark place and he couldn't get out of it. My heart goes out to his friends and family.
Wil, I'm glad you chose the path you chose, the 'road less traveled' and it seems to have made all the difference. It's too bad Jonathan wasn't able to take the road less traveled. He was a talented young man who will be missed.

Wow... I think I had a major crush on him when I was in Elementary School. And he was my age too...

That abyss of depression is such a dark one and it echos of all the negative thrown at the person in it. I can only imagine what it is like for someone who was 'worshiped' by peers during their formative years and then told they were 'washed-up' (The Rush song "Losing it" comes to mind.)

It's sad that we forget that, above and beyond the glitter and gold, we are all just human with a million and one ways to break.

I'm trying very hard not to write a post making comparsions between Lucas and Wesley. It just doesn't feel right at this point.

Smooth sailing for him, always.

It hurts my heart so much to think that someone can be so despondent that they think death is the only way out. No matter how bad things get, there are always people around you -- even complete strangers -- who care about you. I never knew Jonathan Brandis, nor was I a follower of his work, but he touched my life in an indirect way. I used to be a part of a group called "Best Buddies," that was sort of like a big brother/big sister organization, but for children and teens with special needs. My "buddy" LOVED Jonathan Brandis. We used to go to a submarine-themed restaurant called "Dive!" and he would wear his "SeaQuest" hat and pretend he was Lucas. I had never seen him so happy as when he was doing this. I wish Jonathan could have known how much he meant to my friend.

I was reading and saw "Jonathon Brandis's apparent suicicde" and thought, I never knew about it, thinking it was long ago. But I clicked on news, and read that it was November 12. I think it's a terrible shame and it makes me sad to know that a person feels the only way out is death, as if it solves everything. But with death it ends all hope and opportunity that life offers. I watched his movies, and he was a good actor, and good looking, and 27. So young. So soon. It's tragic. The best people seem to go so soon. (I didn't know him, but sometimes you can tell right away if someone is genuine and a good person. I can't tell you how sad I was when Aaliyah died. It was bizarre how much I cried. Imagine how the people who were close to her felt. And John Ritter. I watched Three's Company for years and he always made me laugh no matter what was going on, and I still watch it. There was this article about him in a magizine that made me burst into tears. It gave details about how he died on his daughter's 5th birthday and how excited he was to see her. Things like that can choke you up. The worste things happen to the best people.

I lost my best friend at 23 too!I saw the comments were at 49 so this makes 50!Peace!

For all of you interested in this, here's a link to the last movie of Jonathan: http://www.tytt.com/splash.asp

Here's another article with an up-to-date photo of Jonathan: http://tv.zap2it.com/tveditorial/tve_main/1,1002,271|84772|1|,00.html

and finally a link that has all the information on all the work he has done. It's quite impressive, he has done a LOT !
http://www.tvtome.com/tvtome/servlet/PersonDetail/personid-51892

I've said this before, and i'll say this again, I am shocked that this could happen and it wasn't reported for nearly a week. I found out on the 14th, but I could barely find any info on it, it's not even hit the british consiousness. I have had to search all the US websites.

He was a talented guy, and to think how his life has been summed up is horrifying. On one website there was two lines, his name, when he died and "The kid from SeaQuest".

I actually cried for him the other day. He was the one celebity I have ever written two, and I always hoped he'd come to the UK so I could meet. Unfortuantly he never did manage to create a name for himeself over here. You'd only know him if you were big SeaQuest fans.

Jonathan Brandis, Rest in Peace, and may the place you be now be better than the place you were when here in the living world!

Jonathan Brandis 13th April 1976 - 12th November 2003

Oh my God... I read thru that link and I totally forgot that he played Good King Wenceslas once... that was such a good film, and he was so terrific in it. They shot it in the Czech Republic, from what I remember, and I remember him saying how much he liked it down there...
My heart has been heavy for days... he will be missed. Peace to you Jon.

With me, I usually don't follow too closely behind television and movie actors. I'm totally into music. But I'm not totally "brain dead" when it comes to who's who. When I heard the news I said to myself, "Hey! I know that name." Then I read further and found out what movies and/or series he was in. My mind was still foggy but an image did pop into my head. I then said to myself, "Oh, he was that cute kid that I tried so hard to convince myself that I wasn't falling for him because I'm too old for that." Then I went in search for pictures and low and behold, yes he was that very same kid.

Whenever someone is lost, especially in the manner that Jonathan Brandis was lost to us, I don't know whether or not to cry. I didn't know him but I knew of him. I didn't follow his career but still I knew of some of his work. I'm still at a lost. I still can't voice how I really feel right now.

It seems every one on the internet is talking about the loss of Jonathan Brandis but nothing has been on t.v about him. I think it is mostly due the thing with Michael Jackson. Its a shame to lose someone like him but have it go unnoticed because if a messed up freak like Michael Jackson(yeah i admit i was a fan of his,still am of his early stuff.)Most people are talking about how close in age bye a few years they were to him and how they lost some one as well. I have never really lost any one close to me due to suicide. But what bothers me the most was his age.We were close in age,and i don't mean by years,i mean by days. He was only 2 weeks younger than myself. Thats what hit home for me. The differences between my life and his are vast but the same feelings would be there if something happened to me.

Reading this blog is always a bright spot for me and I was shocked to see the news of Jon's death. Like many other young women I had his posters on my wall, but I also loved the charcters he played. Especially, Lucas, who was a really intelligent young person who got to hold his own with adults and explore new places. He even had a dolphin!

As someone who is now his age, I am deeply saddned he is no longer with us. I send the warmest sympathies to his family during this time. What an awful tragedy to endure for them. He was young, talented and would have had much ahead of him.

I had the awesome fortune of meeting him when I was a teenager, when I was a clown in the Thanksgiving Day parade and he was on a float. I spoke to him (Inwardly jumping up and down in pure excitement) and he was absolutly one of the nicest people when we talked. I'll always remember that.

And thank you Wil, for allowing your fans who are also fans of his, to speak here.

My heart goes out to the family of Jonathan Brandis. I've personally been affected by suicide twice in my life: my grandfather and a good friend. I'll never forget talking to my friend the day before she shot herself. It still confuses me how "normal" she seemed that day. Its been over five years (I'm 28) and I still wonder if there is something I could of said or done. For a long time I was just angry at her, for putting her mother through that much grief. As for my grandfather, he was sick. And apparently he was tired of being sick...

My heartfelt condolences go out to his family and friends.

My condolences to the friends and family of Jonathan. Saw his work, and I thought he had a real passion for it. Nobody can really know why, or what was the reason for it. I hope we all learn a lesson on loss, hope, and what it means to be human, not an actor, not a movie-star, heck not even a child-star (or former child star, which is a funny phrase in itself, because if you grow up AT ALL, then you are a F.C.S.) but human, and alive. Jonathan's death has hurt us all, for we have lost not only his talent, but also his life... his soul... and his ATM number.

*What is it about 27*

There's nothing about 27. A handful of actors, musicians, and artists have died at age 27. Since 27 is a multiple of nine, and nine is seen by 'numerologists' as significant, people have catalogued those famous individuals who died at that age. Jonathan Brandis can now be added to that list if the cataloguers feel he's worthy of joining Jim Morrison, Jimi Hendrix, and the others on the list.

If someone went around and catalogued the list for every possible age, I believe you would discover 27 is nothing special. For suicides there might be more representation for the late teens and twenties -- just because they're a more emotional time of life, generally.

"In the End, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends. "
- Martin Luther King Jr.

Some people you just like, even though they are a perfect stranger. It's a chemistry thing somehow. Yeah, we all know actors play a role, and are totally different people from their on-screen persona.

But in certain people, their inner light shines through, cause its hard to hide, and you get a glimpse of them as a real person. Its a subtle thing to read, but it's definitely there. The little lines on their face from smiling a lot, the twinkle in their eyes. Small stuff that adds up to what someone is really like behind the mask they hold up to the world.

I don't know Wil Wheaton from Adam's housecat, nor did I even have a blog like this one, to read every day from Jonathan Brandis. But I am pretty sure that Jonathan, like Wil is, was a really nice guy. He was someone I just liked instinctively.

It happens.

I think maybe it was John Steinbeck who once wrote that you should live your life so that no one is happy that you are dead. Yeah, I'm down with that. We all take different paths in life, but no matter where we go, we take a little of each other with us.

Its pretty natural for Wil to sympathise with Jonathan, and try to understand what drove someone to do such a thing. And what Wil suggested couldnt help but have been one of the straws on the Camels Back. Perhaps not the last one, but a factor. We will never know, cause he didnt leave us a note. But it's pretty safe to assume he had some inner daemons to contend with.

I'm very sorry that someone I liked is gone. And wish he had taken a different turn in the path. The world is a little darker today, because some of it's light is missing.

Greg

I just read about Jonathan's death on another site, and for some reason I did immediately think of Wil, and how greatful I am that for whatever reason it was not him. Then I was on this site, and Wil wrote almost exactly the thoughts I had just posted elsewhere. Personally I will mourn the loss of another human being, another young actor, another soul who lost their way. But I will also celebrate the fact that at least one (still young) actor has found his way, and continues to share his life and his work with those of us who call themselves fans. Thank you.

"Don’t Stop Wil... We need you and your words as much as you need us (readers)."
I haven't had the time to read all the comments on this page, but I want to add my own regarding 'Honolulu Hawaii's post at the top.
I'm just a regular guy, but I happen to be a devoted reader of wwdn, simply because of the person Wil is. Reading about his experiences, thoughts and especially his love for his family will always give you something to think about, and can truely brighten up your day!
I'd be surprised if Wil reads this far through his comments, but I want him to know that for every loser out there who still thinks he's TV's-Wil-Wheaton (or 'Wesley'), there's 50 of us who respect him for being the guy whose thoughts we're lucky enough to read.
I used to watch DSV, but cannot claim to know anything else about Jonathan Brandis, or start to guess about what happened. But I know it was a tragic shame, and today I feel such sympathy for everyone who loves and misses him.
I'd just like to tell Wil that no matter shit might happen, millions of us are here to listen, and he will never be alone :)

It's still not too late to die young.

yeah.. how great and lucky we are all to have wil.. sorry but man.. you dont gotta apply every downfall to yourself...
now you got people worrying about you and not J Brandis and his family.
yeah i read your Afterthought... but still..

now dont get me wrong.. im not an active WWDN reader in the sense i never ever comment, with the exception of now, but ive been coming here for about a year. so dont think im trying to flame wil here. i just have a thing when people talk about what others are going through and use it to apply to themselves... though wil does have relavence in what he said in his after thought.. but wil could have applied his analogy to everyone rather then a simularity he and Brandis had..

It's only human to make assumptions about what possibly inspired Jonathan to take his own life.

I've noticed a pattern in modern thought that creates great potential for suicidal tendencies within many young individuals.

That pattern revolves around idealistic goals that can only be met if the individual makes minimal mistakes in their career, relationships, and life choices.

Unfortunately, what I have witnessed so frequently, and continue to witness, is that this pursuit for an ideal existence can often leave one lost, especially if potentially irreversible mistakes are made.

Hollywood is ruled by idealism. If an actor fails to maintain this goal, they ultimately fail in the eyes of their harshest critic, themselves. This often is devastating enough to inspire them to throw in the towel.

It's ok to make irreversible mistakes. It's ok to be human. I feel that the most realistic goal in life is the goal to accept mistakes.

E B

Well, depression is a disease, and it's to be taken more seriously than it's taken today. Every single one of us can wake up tomorrow morning with a depression, no matter how old one is or what one does for a living. And every 6th person that suffers from depressions statistically ends up killing him-/herself, because that's the only solution he/she sees. Once again, I think we should just let Jonathan rest in peace. And leave Wil alone, there's nothing wrong with pointing out parallels to certain parts in Jonathan's life... on the other hand I don't necessarily think that Jonathan took wrong paths or was a weaker character than Wil. Like I said, depression is a disease, and every one can get it.

I read about Jonathan Brandis' death through this site actually, and was deeply shocked. In fact i cried. I do not cry very often, but something about finding out that he had died hit me. I grew up watching Sea Quest. My older sister and i would sit and watch it every week, without fail. For an hour every week, I would be there on the ship with him, going through whatever he happened to be going through. Now, i am finding it so hard to believe that he is gone. I would like to think that he is a much better place, where he'll be happier. My deepest sympathy and thoughts go out to his friends and family.

Rest In Peace.

In much the same way Wil, for 45 minutes every week, when my sister and I would Star Trek:TNG, we would be there with you, and the rest of the crew, and now of course we have your site. I have never met you, but yet, i feel i know you. its strange, i know, but in an odd kind of a way, you are a friend. I visit your website everyday, just to see if you have posted anything new, and i feel i can write whatever i am feeling at the time in this bit! thanks dude!!

When I heard that Jonathan had commited suicide, a piece of me felt disconnected. When I was younger and even to this day I am either mistaken or told I look just like Jonathan. It's just wierd. I am only a month older than him. I had thought that someday he and I would be in a Twins movie or something. Such a tragedy.

WHAT?!?! Until I read your blog I didn't even know this had happened!!!!! I can't believe it, I loved that guy!! This is a real shock :(

I can't help thinking that a major mid 90's icon is dead. I live in China at the moment, so talking to people who actually know who Jonathan Brandis is are few in number. there's an American who lives in the next town over from me and last night I told him about JB.

"nah, I never watched SeaQuest."

"what about Neverending Story II?"

"oh yeah! he was in Ladybugs, right?"

"yep"

"and he was in that cool teenie-bopper movie with Chuck Norris, right? man, I loved that movie. the Martial Arts geek always comes out in me when I watch that movie. not that JB was all that good, but there was this one scene with this asian dude using nunchucks....it rocks! JB was a pretty good actor too. wow....he's dead...."

And then we talked about the 27 club and couldn't remember if Jimi Hendrix and Jim Morrison were 27 when they died, but agreed about River Phoenix, Kurt Cobain and James Dean. There's a lot of greats out there who left us too soon.

I'm glad that Wil isn't a part of them, but among the greater ones who chose life, love and geeks like us who read his weblog everyday. I thought it was so cool watching the New Mickey Mouse Club in the late 80's/early 90's and seeing Wil Wheaton on there, watching some lucky guy spend a day with him on the set of Star Trek. Most grown-ups weren't fond of Wesley, but you know Wil that most people your age and a little bit younger totally respected you at that time and still do.

Peace.

If it's any consolation, I had crushed on you both, so when I thought of him as "the Wesley" of Seaquest, it was in a good way. *g* I'm really sorry to hear about this, though. My first guess was also that he might have done it because of the frustrations associated with growing up famous. I was very sad to hear the news. He's only a year older than I am. I feel so bad for his parents.

It's so heartbreaking when something like this happens. No matter who it is that dies I always wish I could've done soemthing to help them.

I barely heard about it yesterday. He was my entire world when I was a teenager. I was so in love with him and I NEVER missed ANYTHING he did and now hes gone. I am sooo heartbroken over this and I cried all day yesterday. Im also 27. I'll never forget him and I will miss him very much.

R.I.P Jonathan Brandis. Youre in my heart forever

I never thought he would do anything like that. I guess I saw knew his character though not the real Jonathan. Maybe he made the right choice, and maybe he didn't. He will be the only one to ever know. Sorry to all of his family. I know how it feels. I've had a very close family member commit sucide when he was only 18.

"Maybe he made the right choice, and maybe he didn't."-Jennifer Manning

Suicide is NEVER the right choice!! How can you even think that?!? i don't mean to attack you, but there were so many better options for him!

Why couldn't he have gone to his parents or friends if he was depressed? Why not go to a doctor or therapist? I mean, there are resources. He was only 27, for crying out loud. He never had a chance to get married or have kids. There was so much he could have lived for. He was no longer a teen idol, but he was still working. It's especially weird because I always saw him as a vivacious, happy, clean-cut guy.

This really is sad to me. I have been thinking about him on and off since I found out. I wish I knew him. This sounds arrogant, I know, but for all my flaws I'm a good friend. If I knew him I might have been able to help him.

Bottom line, I feel really bad about this.

Hi,

I didn't know that this had happened until early this morning, when I read it on your site, Wil. I don't get to read the news as often as I would like to, and this came as quite a surprise... and I will tell you why...

Last week, my fiancee and myself were driving home from town, and we got onto the topics of 1980's shows that we used to watch in our childhood that really "stood out", anyway I said "SeaQuest DSV" and my fiancee said "hmmmm... was that the show about the submarine thing?", and I replied "yes that's the one!" She went on to say "Oh yeah, I remember that but I never watched it much, but I do remember Wil Wheaton being in it as the kid who made the device to allow the dolphin to talk!" Well, I continued to tell her that it wasn't infact Wil Wheaton, but that I myself had on occasion got the 2 of them mixed up. I don't know why I used to get the 2 of you mixed up in my youth, or why my fiancee had done the same exact thing, but as you say yourself Wil, you both could be considered rather similar to one another, 2 peas in a pod.

What makes this rather strange for me is that up until that point, I hadn't thought of that kid for many, many years! Yet, on a day that was very close to his death, we began reminiscing about him, and you!

It is a real shame that this young guy has left us all, as he will surely be missed, and certainly remembered by my fiancee and I, as "that kid that was a lot like Wil Wheaton!"

Oh, and PS Mr. Wheaton! During that conversation my fiancee did let me know that she used to have a crush on you when she was in High School, and that she had a poster of you on her locker door! HeHe...

Well, just thought I would let you know about that. Take care, good health to you and your family Wil, and above all... be happy! For there are many out there who are, at this moment in time, not experiencing it.

I don't know, Wil.

Your struggles are truly unique to you -- for sure.

But some of us out here suffer daily in ways you could never afford to imagine.

If I'd turned left or right or picked the 1 over the 0, yup - me too, Wil. All too true.

Life is a bitch and life is a blessing for each of us in differing ways and at differing times respectively -- yes?

However, and I hope you accept this as encouragement, I see a WEB site here on a regular basis that has people [more times than NOT], showering you with perfect and inexplicable attention. You are loved by so many and give so many [clearly] so much to look forward to.

You're a rich man, Mr. Wil. Me thinks far more richer than Jonathan Brandis would ever have known.

'Tis sad for him and the ones he left behind -- for sure.

But I hope you [at least] find joy in all these many gestures of love and support finding you here on a daily/hourly basis and spend less time this holiday season feeling bad -- about yourself. I hope this for us all. Your life is far from perfect I'm sure. That's what we all dig about you, Wil; your life, as extraordinary as it is, you are ever so, ordinary. And this is a comforting thought.

Goodnight, Jonathan.
Peace has found you, now.
May peace find us all, tonight.

Blessings, Wil.
-s

I came home from my brothers birthday, read this piece of news on my friends blog and was so shocked. His initials and mine are still carved in the bamboo in a nearby park. They've been there for 10 years. I also had my walls plastered floor to ceiling with those tacky pictures, and wrote him fan mail (all the way from Australia!). I don't understand. I really really dont understand...I told my Mum and she was so upset because everyone in my family remembers him - he was the only tv star I had a crush on.
But it was my first thought to come to Wils site because I knew he would have a good perspective. Argh this is pants.

i couldn't read all the comments cause some of them p*ssed me off so much, but i will say this.

Jonathan was not just some washed up actor or ex teen idol or what have you.

Jonathan was a person, and as Laura said, we have no idea what demons he had haunting him.

and you don't know if he had a choice in the matter or not! when you're so depressed, you can't see the light at the end of the tunnel, then maybe you start to dig your way out in the middle of your journey...

right now i'm feeling that my tunnel turned pitchblack with him. :(

I thank God that you were stronger than that. Maybe it was your family support, maybe it was just your own determination to rise above the Hollywood bullshit. But I am thankful that you are here and that you can share things with us like you do. I, for one, would be very sad to hear of any harm coming to Uncle Willie. ♥

YOU'RE TOO OLD TO STOP ME! YOU'RE ALL TOO OLD.
I'm every nightmare you've ever had. I'm your worst dream come true. I'm everything you ever were afraid of.Want a balloon?::glares at wil::: BEEP BEEP Richie! They ALL float down here. When you're down here with us, you'll float toO!
:::points to graves::: Take your pick, B-b-b-Billy boy. Oh, except for the one on the end, that's already taken. Sorry.

Sides, he was a really good actor, just like Wil here, but does Hwood care about that? nope.

and Pennywise... beep beep richie to yourself.

though i gotta admit, Pennywise, when i read that, i laughed... i just need to laugh f*uck d*ammit... i've been crying so much.

i'm gonna watch IT now and be very drunk.

Did you know Kellie Waymire? I just read that she has passed too!

Hey, for some reason I was thinking of you the other day...This thing with Jonathan Brandis doesn't really affect/effect me, but I am saddened to hear of someone getting so low.

I just wanted to say hello and to tell you that any time you e-mailed me, I wasn't able to respond without your spam killer returning my mail. I don't quite have that encryption thing figured out.

Belinda

Did you know Kellie Waymire from your Trek adventures Wil? She has unfortunately passed away as well. :(

Why was Jon's passing not reported for 8 days? was he active in anti-war activism? after playing casey pedersen in the year that trembled wouldn't surprise me. no report for 4-6 weeks? if he hanged himself? many sites of his were listed as "suspended", not this site is no longer available, or exceeding bandwidth. something is fishy here. rest in peace JB, see you again at the marineland public dolphin tank on the other side

I started skipping over comments after about the tenth one. I don't think Wil is right, or wrong about commenting on how life can be for a child star.

Jonathan is gone. That's all I care about. I thought he was incredible. It's time to mourn, not argue motivations.

:(

I tried to commit suicide when I was 15- as did my mother and her father before her. I sometimes wonder if there is a genetic predisposition towards attempting suicide- that maybe if a person with that predisposition has a particularly awful life they are more likely to attempt it than someone without it.

In any case, I'm so glad I didn't succeed.

I'm glad you didn't too.

Stay happy, people :)

I'm saddened that anyone has to do this and go through this.... i used to love DSV, almost as much as TNG... I had a major crush on him too... he was a good actor!

my thoughts about this are simple!

There are many obstacles in life and the only obstacle you cannot overcome is Death!

i've been there, we all have or will be, its a sad fact of life, i was crying listening to a song before i read about this and i'm crying now..

good charlotte are just about to relese this!

Hold On
this world
this world is gone
and you don’t
you don’t have to go
your feeling sad your feeling lonely
and no one seems to care
your mothers gone and your father hits you
its pain you cannot bear
but we all bleed the same way that you do
and we all have the same things to go through
hold on if you feel like letting go
hold on it gets better than you know

the days are seeming way too long
and your nights, you cant sleep at all
hold on

your unsure what your waiting for but you don’t want to know more
and your not sure what your looking for but you don’t want to know more

but we all bleed the same way as you do
and we all have the same things to go through

hold on if you feel like letting go
hold on it gets better than you know
don’t stop looking your one step closer
don’t stop searching its not over
hold on

what are you looking for
what are you waiting for
do you know what your doing to me
your hell
what are you waiting for

I hope none of the people i love and care about be it family friends or people who i class as my online family, ever feel that this is the only option...

love you Wil, Anne and Family, love you guys @ WWDN... stay strong and hold on!

Andrea xx

My deepest sympathies to all who were touched by his death. Suicide is one of the most painful things for those close to the victim. My brother attempted suicide (and thank all things holy, he lived and is now physically and spiritually well), and even that was soul-quaking and painful beyond description. I can only imagine what his family must feel.

I waxed terribly existential when I read of his death, because after "Ladybugs," I had such a huge crush on him that I covered my walls with Jonathan vision torn from every Tiger Beat I could afford to die. I was always fond of his work and always excited when I heard he was doing new projects. I had in fact just recently looked him up on the Internet Movie Database to see what he was working on...

Jesus, it's a shame.

And even if his suicide was in no way related to his career, it does bring to mind the sick and disturbing practice of Hollywood to chew up and spit out new and young talent without any regard to the damage it does.

Oh, man..that should've been "afford to buy," not "afford to die." What an awful Freudian slip...sorry.

I was deeply saddened to hear of Jonathan's death. Growing up, he was one of the few I ever had a crush on, as I never really was the type to swoon over many stars. Being that he was only two years older than me...I guess that also made the crush more 'realistic' in a sense. I loved watching his movies, and his character on "SeaquestDSV". His talent both as an actor, and the episode he both wrote and directed proved he had a very bright future ahead of him.

I'm not stranger to depression myself. I suffer from it, have been hospitalized (voluntarily) for it, and am being treated for it, as I have been since 1998. Had a college counselor not encouraged me to take that step and seek inpatient treatment, I don't know where I'd be. I think that's why in part I'm taking Jonathan's death so hard, even though I did not know him personally. Because I DO know that if someone might have known, if he would have asked for help, perhaps something could have changed the situation. But I also know from what I've learned over the years that sadly, you can't help someone who doesn't want help either. They first have to admit they have a problem. For those of you who think suicide is the selfish choice, that may very well be... but to the one who is suffering... they see know other way out... and that is what breaks my heart... if these reports are indeed true, and the autopsy confirms that Jonathan did take his own life, that is what will make it sad...to learn that he felt so withdrawn and hopeless that there was no other way out. Wherever you are now Jonathan, I hope you are at peace. Know that you were loved, and still are... and will be sadly missed by many, friends, family, and fans worldwide. I pray that you rest easy now...and in my own illness battling depression, I will go own fighting...for my sake, as well as in your memory...Rest in Peace Jonathan

I've been so sad about hearing that Jon died. oh man, my friend told me about this a day or two ago and I think I'm still in shock. I can remember just thinking he was the greatest thing ever when I was younger and I was constantly hoping and waiting to get my hands on everything he'd been in til this day. Its just so awful for someone to be lost so young. My heart goes out to his loved ones and to him for whatever reasons he had for ending his life. Rest in Peace Jon, you left much too soon.