WIL WHEATON dot NET: 1.5

If you'd like to read my most recent blog posts, head over to WIL WHEATON dot NET: In Exile, my backup blog at Typepad.

Hi there. WWdN is currently undergoing a redesign and some maintenance. If you'd like to know what the status of the redesign is, or see some of the older WWdN files, read this entry.

What in the wide world of sports is going on here?

Way back in September of last year, I attempted to upgrade Movable Type, the blogging software that powers WWdN. I also attempted to move a few thousand entries and hundreds of thousands of comments into a newly-created (and faster) MySQL database.

And, uh, I broke it.

Actually, I didn't break it. Someone who left a comment broke it when they used a seemingly random string of characters to indicate a break in their comment. Unbeknownst to me and them, it was the same string of characters MT used to indicate the end of an entry and its associated comments. When MT was moving all the data into its new (did I mention faster?) database, it came to that string of characters, and said to itself, "Oh boy! I get to start a new entry now! Let's see, what's the TITLE of that entry?"

Look . . . look . . . look . . .

"Uh-oh, there's no TITLE. I'd better look some more."

Look . . . look . . . look . . .

"Yeah, it's still not there. Well, I don't know what the next entry is TITLEd, so I'm going to just barf all over the server now, and fail. I'm sure one of the Users I heard about in TRON will figure this out and fix it quickly. There's no way my User, Wil, would stay in some backup blog for six months!"

Ha! Stupid smug software. I've been in Exile for nine months! Who's laughing now, jerk? Who's your daddy! Say my name, bitch! Yeah!

Uh. Sorry about that.

Off to Exile

I didn't know how long it would take me to figure out the problem, fix it, and get back here to WWdN, so I set up a backup blog at Typepad, called WIL WHEATON dot NET: In Exile. I intended to hang out there for a couple of weeks while I worked on this blog, but I quickly discovered that WYSIWYG editor at Typepad is great, and since it did all the heavy lifting for me (formatting, marking up links and inserting and modifying images) I had much more time to just take creative ideas and put them into my blog. Around this time, I also got some new writing jobs that actually put money into my pocket and food on my table -- jobs writing about poker for CardSquad, writing a column on classic gaming for the AV Club called The Games of our Lives, and editing the geek news at Suicide Girls. In my spare time, I played a lot of Texas Holdem Poker at Poker Stars (where I'm a member of Team PokerStars) and did things with my family. I had one of my first real "grown up" moments the day I realized that there really are only 24 hours in a day, and I had to choose very carefully how I wanted to spend them. You know what I didn't want to spend them on? hand-coding html and tweaking software settings. It's sad, and I'll probably lose a 3d20 geek points for saying it, but those days are way, way behind me. After a day of making freelance deadlines, the last thing I'd want to do is try to repair and redesign my website, and since I was happy in Exile, it just wasn't that important to me.

The database was eventually repaired, thanks to the efforts of Mike Pusateri and his co-worker Yoshi, who managed to scrape the entire blog for me, and put it into a MT-readable format as an Xmas gift, and the technical support staff at Six Apart, who figured out what the hell was wrong with my dabase in the first place. Repaired database in hand, I found myself with a delimma: return to the now-totally-outated and badly-in-need-of-a-redesign WWdN, or continue using Typepad? Mostly, it was Typepad's awesome WYSIWYG editor that was keeping me in Exile, but there was also the redesign issue: no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't come up with anything that I really liked.

A few weeks ago, the design problem was unexpectedly solved, when I wrote a series of posts in exile (part one, part two, part three) that helped me clear out a bunch of mental logjams. Seconds before I hit publish on the final one, the way I wanted the redesigned WWdN to look sprung into my mind fully-formed. I grabbed a piece of paper, sketched it out, scanned it, and e-mailed it to my friend, who is working on it at this very moment. I've found two great replacements for the WYSIWYG editor I loved so much: ecto, which is a desktop blogging application for Windows and Mac, and Performancing, which is a free Firefox extension that runs on just about any platform in the world, and is optimized for WheatonIX. (In fact, I composed and published this entry using Performancing. Yes, it's that easy to use.)

So this post represents a bridge between WWdN, and WWdN 2: Electric Boogaloo. All the links you would see on the front page of the old WWdN are in this post, so if you're new to WWdN you can explore some of the old (and massively outdated) sections.

WWdN will be re-launched very, very soon. Until then, you can use all the nifty information to explore what's already here. You can also come over to WIL WHEATON dot NET: In Exile to find out where my mind is right now.

Thanks for stopping by.

Old WWdN Content

• If this is your first time here, you should read this.
• By popular demand, you can now see or hear me read from my books Just A Geek and Dancing Barefoot! If you like what you hear, you may want to pick up a copy of Just A Geek: Teh Audiobook. Or not. Whatever. I'm not the boss of you.
• audio blog
• photo blog
• faq
• about
• gallery
• contact
• links
• store
• appearances
• Technorati Profile

Posted by Wil at 9:38 PM | Permalink

I just found out that I'm on the World Poker Tour on the Travel Channel tonight. It's the WPT Invitational from Commerce Casino, where I outlasted all the other celebrity players and finished 23rd to land $10,000 for City of Hope. I doubt I'll get much screen time, but my friend Burns! just called Anne to tell her that he saw me.

So . . . now you know! If anyone gets an mpeg or something, let me know and I'll link it up.

Update: WWdN:iX reader Andrew sent me the following captures:

XviD (9 MB)

mpeg2 (30MB)

It 's a great segment. I got a lot more camera time than I expected, and so did Darwin!  If anyone wants to seed .torrents, let me know and I'll update again. Thanks, Andrew!

(image via Dr. Pauly)

Posted by Wil at 7:42 PM | Permalink | Comments (3)

Pauly:

If more Americans read books every night instead of watching TV, we'd live in a more productive society. If more Americans watched the news and read real newspapers and magazines, instead of crappy programs like American Idol, then I'm confident that George Bush would not be our president. But heck, that's what our leaders really want deep down... a mindless, uneducated populous that will work 40 hours a week so they can earn enough money to buy things to keep them distracted from the evil deeds that our leaders and suits in Fortune 500 companies are conducting everyday under your noses.

Posted by Wil at 3:33 PM | Permalink | Comments (17)

Question the first: What if comic geeks re-enacted comic book battles the same way history geeks re-enact Civil War battles? Answer: Re-Enacting Marvel Secret Wars. (via Wired)

Question the second: What would happen if the Enterprise D battled with the original Enterprise? Answer: Sci-Fi Battles: Kirk vs. Picard (Thanks, Columbo!)

Posted by Wil at 2:21 PM | Permalink | Comments (25) | TrackBacks (1)

Dinner is finished, and Anne is helping Nolan with some homework at the dining room table. I'm sitting outside by the fire pit, enjoying the fruits of our weekend of patio labor. I am surrounded by freshly-planted wildflowers, two types of tomatoes, and the sweet smell of lavender, roses, and just-turned dirt.

I was listening to Big Tracks on XM, through DirecTV, on our home stereo. I sang REO Speedwagon's Keep On Lovin' You a little too loudly while I sipped a Stone Pale Ale and digested the most amazing chicken soft tacos (marinated in tequila, lime, salsa and Tapatio) I think I've ever cooked, when Ryan came out to the patio from the kitchen.

"Can I turn off XM and put on Live Aid?" He said.

"No, you can't," I said, a little perturbed that my REO Speedwagon rocking had been interrupted.

"But you've been monopolizing the TV, and you're not even inside," he said. Very reasonable.

" . . . I meant that I loved you foreverrrrr, and I'm gonna ke--" I sang. "Dude. I'm trying to get my rock on, and you're totally harshing my mellow."

"You're trying to get your rock on . . . to REO Speedwagon?" He said, incredulous. Tough to argue with that. "You're the only one listening to this, so isn't it fair to consider the rest of the family?"

Dammit. I raised him to think like this. I'm so proud of him, but . . . Big Tracks, and Stone Pale Ale, and sitting by the fire pit! Shit. Shit. Shit.

"Did you ask your mom what she thinks?" I said.

"She's going to say that she doesn't care, because she's helping Nolan with his homework." He said.

REO Speedwagon ended, and Asia began: "I never meant to be so bad to you . . ."

"Okay," I said, "let's go inside and ask your mom what she thinks."

We walked into the house, and found Anne and Nolan at the dining room table. Ryan related our discussion, and asked Anne if she cared if he changed the channel.

"I don't care," she said.

Ryan jumped up and pointed at me. "Ha! I told you!"

"I don't care about the radio, either," Nolan said, with a pointed smirk at me.

"Yes! I get to put on Live Aid!" Ryan said. He started toward the living room.

"Uh, wait." I said, "we haven't reached consensus."

"Oh, we totally have, Wil," he said with a grin, "you're 25% in favor, and mom, Nolan, and I are
75% opposed. We have a majority."

I was done. I'd lost, and now it was time to take it like a man.

"Dude, I have, uhm, extra . . . uh . . . powers." I said.

"What?" Ryan said.

"Yeah, I went up, up, down, down, left, right, left, right, B, A, start," I said.

"Okay," Ryan said, "so you get extra lives on Contra. What does that have to do with the radio?"

I don't know how he knew that it was the Konami code, but I'm sure he picked it up from me, somewhere over the years.

"Okay," I said, "just because you knew that, you win. Go put on Live Aid."

Queen is blasting out We Will Rock You, from Wembley Stadium in 1985, as I type this.

Posted by Wil at 7:56 PM | Permalink | Comments (38)

Some days, you just have to accept that you're not destined to do the things you want to do. You just have to say, "I did my best, but it's just not going to happen."

Like this fucking podcast, for example. After spending nearly three hours working on it yesterday, only to have my machine completely eat all of it and leave me with nothing but an empty feeling and a tiny ball of rage to show for it, I sat back down today to give it another go. As a bonus, I even convinced my wife to let me take out the old iRiver and ask her some questions about dating, and then being married to a geek. It was awesome.

However, the gods had other plans, because when I imported my audio from my iRiver to my Powerbook, it was totally useless, just like it was after the Grand Slam convention. Only this time, instead of being totally blown out, it decided that it needed to skip all over the place and drop out about every three seconds. I've discovered that the only thing this particular iRiver is good for is hitting with a sledgehammer, then setting on fire, stomping into a ball of goo, and launching at the invading Viking army via a trebuchet. (And it's not even very good for that, to be honest.)

This really needs to just work. I really need to be able to just sit down, take what's in my head, and put it into a recording. It's clear to me that if I want to do this podcast on any regular schedule, it has to be as technologically easy as it is for me to write, and I just don't have the tools for that right now. I have to get some sort of reliable recording rig that is NOT a USB headset into fucking Garageband that crashes, and the iRiver that decides to just stop working one day. I need stuff that just works.

This is all a roundabout way of saying: I'm really frustrated, and really upset that I've poured five hours of my time into this fucking thing, and I have nothing to show for it. It's the end of the week, I'm hungry and cranky, and instead of trying to start all over again and force a show out by the end of the day today, I'm going offline for several hours, to have dinner with my wife. Thank you all for your questions and the time you spent asking them; I'll do my very best to get the technical side of things worked out quickly, so your time will not have been wasted, as well.

Have a great weekend, everyone. Please drive safely.

Posted by Wil at 4:30 PM | Permalink | Comments (59)

This is funny because it's true.

Posted by Wil at 9:48 AM | Permalink | Comments (23) | TrackBacks (1)

Eventful is getting lots of press, which is great for Brian and his entire team, because I believe that it's a tool that indie artists and guys like me will be able to use to connect with our audiences in ways that just weren't possible as recently as a year ago.

But I'm getting really tired of reading things like this:

The Eventful demand system is still new, and right now the system is overwhelmed by a collection of demands to hear former Star Trek actor Wil Wheaton speak. But don't let that put you off.

I'm sorry, but why would that put anyone off? Because it'd be better if Eventful was filled with demands for huge artists that don't care about meeting their audience, and wouldn't listen to demands, anyway?

Yeah, it's a really terrible thing that I hopped on board with Eventful, and consulted with Brian before it even launched, because I believe in it, and my upcoming trips to Montreal and Boston are perfect examples of how it can work, right? And it's equally off-putting that because of Eventful, the people who read my blog and I have a way to figure out where and when I should come perform, right? Yeah, that's just terrible! It's so off-putting!

And excuse me if this puts you off, Mr. Web 2.0 writer, but could we maybe retire the phrase "former Star Trek actor?" I know it's hard for you mainstream media types to understand that I've done a few things with myself since Star Trek ended over a decade ago, (like publish two books, write several weekly columns, and provide voices for several video games and animated series,) but I have a lot more in my life than just being a "former Star Trek actor," which you would have known if you'd done your homework.

Update: The article's author has apologized:

I'd like to apologize to you, Wil. I did not mean to offend nor to diminish your work. My tongue-in-cheek comment about how a ton of Eventful Demand posts to see you might be overwhelming to people trying to set up their own demands was not meant as a slight to you personally (although I can see how it was insensitive). As I said to one person who wrote an email to me, it's clear that you've done a lot for Eventful and Eventful has done a lot for you. That's how good business gets done.

I'll buy a ticket to see you when you come to SF.

Thank you, Rafe. Whenever I hear "former Star Trek actor . . ." without any mention of anything else I've done with my life, I do feel diminished and slighted. Apology accepted and appreciated very much.

Posted by Wil at 9:08 AM | Permalink | Comments (72)

Today is Towel Day, a day when all geeks can carry their towels with them in tribute to the hoopiest frood of them all, Douglas Adams.

I absolutely love that I'm recording an all-geek podcast on this most sacred of days.

Updated: Oh! You know what I love even more? Spending 2.5 hours working on the podcast, then losing the entire thing to some weird confluence of system lockups and crashes.

I'm taking a long, long, long don't-break-anything walk, and I'll try again in the morning. Sigh.

Posted by Wil at 3:09 PM | Permalink | Comments (18) | TrackBacks (1)

Today is Towel Day, a day when all geeks can carry their towels with them in tribute to the hoopiest frood of them all, Douglas Adams.

I absolutely love that I'm recording an all-geek podcast on this most sacred of days.

Posted by Wil at 10:47 AM | Permalink | Comments (14)

I am about to begin production on Episode 9 of Radio Free Burrito, but before I get started, I wanted to share a hilarious John Kovalic cartoon with you all.

More to come later . . .

Posted by Wil at 10:12 AM | Permalink | Comments (5) | TrackBacks (1)

I think it's time for a new episode of Radio Free Burrito, don't you?

I had a super good time with episode eight, which was entirely Q&A, so how about this experiment:  I'll do another Q&A show, and focus it on a single topic, guided by whatever is on your mind: The topic is Geek. (Hey, you should go with what you know, right?)

Send your questions to ask at wilwheaton dot net, (with a descriptive subject line, please) and I'll get a new show out by Friday.

Posted by Wil at 10:40 AM | Permalink | Comments (18)

Presented without comment.

Posted by Wil at 7:29 AM | Permalink | Comments (14) | TrackBacks (2)

I wrote a column for The AV Club about my trip to E3, and it hit the web about an hour ago. It's my first foray into my version of gonzo journalism, and I'm really happy with the way it came out.

Take the largest video arcade you remember from your childhood. Now quadruple its size, put it in the middle of Shibuya Crossing, dim the lights, and crank the volume to 11. Toss in a bunch of celebrities, charge $300 for a stale slice of pizza and a soda, crank the volume up to 11 one more time, and you've got E3: the Electronic Entertainment Expo.

E3 started during the halcyon '90s, when Pets.com ruled the world. Now every May, gaming giants like Nintendo, Microsoft, Sony, and Sega gather at the Los Angeles Convention Center to present their newest hardware and software releases to a very select audience: about 30 percent entertainment media, 5 percent distributors, and 65 percent people who have managed to scam press passes so they can spend a day playing video games and checking out booth babes (who this year are required to wear nothing more revealing than miniskirts—the trade-show equivalent of burkas).

[. . .]

Four televisions, eight guitars, and a small crowd stood beneath a mockup that looked remarkably like a concert stage. I could hear Kiss' "Strutter" being played with varying degrees of proficiency as Gen-Xers rocked out in the highly anticipated co-op mode.

"Hey, isn't that Guit—" Spencer asked.

"Muh… guh… huh…" I answered, walking on autopilot to the front of the booth.

"Hi, I'm Wil Wheaton," I said, "and I love your game." Probably not the most professional way to introduce myself, in retrospect. "I'm writing about Guitar Hero II for The A.V. Club."

You can read the entire story at The AV Club, and while you're there, you can check out my Games of our Lives column for this week: Congo Bongo.

I feel really good about this column, and I'm really happy that the type of writing I've perfected over the years on my blog earned a spot in an actual print publication.

Posted by Wil at 5:27 PM | Permalink | Comments (15)

I found this photograph of Wesley, Beverly, and Captain Picard that goes with the scene I posted earlier today. I look like a total dork who is so excited he's about to burst, but I'm cool with that -- it was exactly how I felt the day we shot that scene. I never noticed until just now that Gates looks like a proud mom, and Patrick looks like a proud, uh, Patrick. I wonder if they were channeling real emotions like I was, or if they were just acting really well?

I had to scan it at a low resolution, because I'm pretty sure Viacom's goons would come after me if it was printable and whatnot, but if you always wondered what that scene looked like, well, now you know.

Posted by Wil at 1:19 PM | Permalink | Comments (44) | TrackBacks (1)

While executing a mission in the War on Shit All Over Our House (Operation Feng This Motherfrakkin' Shui) last night, I came across a little bag of stuff in my closet. Inside it, with a bunch of business cards, some old incense (Nag Champa is a constant in my life, it turns out) and a bunch of change, I found my sides and call sheet from the first day I worked on Star Trek: Nemesis a few years ago. (One page of my sides is scanned and pictured at right. Click to embiggen, but it's 1.3 MB, so don't complain if your modem screams at you and doesn't want to have a second date.)

There were a lot of things in my closet that were clearly important to me at one time, but it was as easy to throw them away as it was to open the closet door and dig them out: old T-shirts, shoes, hats, and a few little bags of stuff like the one which contained my sides. It was a sort of time capsule of the 2001-2005 versions of me, and I loved identifying the threads that have tied me together all these years: Converse shoes, collared bowling and lounge shirts, nerdy T-shirts, and baseball caps from the Cubs and Dodgers (why I end up with new caps at least twice a year is a great Mystery of the Universe.)

Every time I go through my stuff and find things that used to be important to me, only to jettison them into the great beyond, I feel a certain amount of freedom and serenity that I won't trade for anything. It's good to feel like my stuff doesn't own me, because it's pretty easy to get rid of my stuff. The other side of that coin, of course, is when I find things that I'm happy I kept, like these sides. I sat on my bedroom floor tonight and remembered holding those sides in my hand, even though I'd known the lines for days, when I was walking from the makeup trailer to the stage when I worked on Nemesis, and I'm glad that I have a physical touchstone from that day. The obnoxious red polyester shirt with the houndstooth pattern and slightly-too-big collar was a nice bonus, too.

Posted by Wil at 6:00 AM | Permalink | Comments (24)

Anne and Ryan were out on Friday, which left Nolan and me to goof off at home when I got back from working on Legion of Super Heroes.

We had big plans: some Magic: The Gathering, a little Brawl, and maybe some OGRE and heads-up poker.

But when I got home, the goddamn pine tree in the front yard dropped a huge ball of pollen down on my car, and I spent the next four hours on the couch sneezing and trying to fight off the allergy-induced headache that felt like it was going to split my head in twain. Good times. Good times.

Nolan ended up playing Diablo II while I watched the Los Angeles Dodgers of Los Angeles pwn the Los Angeles Angels of Not Los Angeles Because We Play In Orange County But Our Idiot Owner Wants To Have Los Angeles In Our Name Because He's A Moron.

For those of you who missed the sixth inning massacre, the final board was:

LAD - 16 25 1
LAANLABWPOCBOIOWHLAIOWBHAM: 3 10 2

Of course, the Dodgers did their best to blow their fifteen run lead, by letting Carter come in and give up three hits and a run, and though I normally don't like games that are total blowouts, watching the Dodgers on the winning side of it for a change, and especially at the expense of the stupid Angels who swept us last year, was awesome. I should also add that the Los Angeles Dodgers of Los Angeles shutout the Los Angeles Because We Play In Orange County But Our Idiot Owner Wants To Have Los Angeles In Our Name Because He's A Moron to complete the sweep, and move up to 1/2 a game out of first in what is probably the weakest division this side of 7 year-olds playing little league.

Speaking of the Dodgers, yesterday, my dad took me to Chavez Ravine for some LAD vs LAANLABWPOCBOIOWHLAIOWBHAM action, and it was awesome. There are pictures in my buzznet blog, including a shot of Tommy Lasorda, who is the closest to royalty you'll see at Dodger Stadium, who got a standing ovation from our entire section when he walked from his seat to wherever it is you go when you're Tommy Fucking Lasorda and you rule.

Anyway, back to Friday: After the only team on the field worthy of having Los Angeles in their name blew the game wide open, I picked up my bag of comics from Free Comic Book Day, and finally had a look at the books I picked up. Most of them were a solid "meh," but that's the whole point of FCBD: to see new stuff that may not excite everyone, but introduce new readers to new material. If you're a guy like me who is already pretty narrow in tastes, it's unlikely you're going to find much that excites you. However, there were a few things that I really liked that I'll pick up next time I'm at my friendly local comics shop:

• Shadowhawk, from Image
• Dead at 17, from Viper
• Superman/Batman from DC

The Bongo freebie was also funny (and funnier than the average episode of the Simpsons these days, which is not meant as a backhanded complement) and the Fantagraphics Funnybook was fantastic.

Around ten, my antihistamines finally started to work, and my headache began to subside as it was overtaken by drowsiness. I fell asleep watching Dark City, which is still a hell of a lot of fun to watch, whether you've got a head filled with antihistamines or not.

Today, Anne and I opened up a new front in the War on Shit All Over Our House and Yard (Operation Enduring Yardwork) and pruned the hell out of a tree in the front yard, as well as tearing out all the weeds that had attempted to establish a beachhead in one of our front yard planters. Rain threatened all day today, but never arrived, which was great, because the combination of breeze and humidity provided just the right level of comfort for fighting the forces of Bermuda grass and their allies the tree-looking things that spring up all over the goddamn place. In a fit of planning ahead, I did my best Sean Penn imitation and snorted a whole bunch of Flonase (relax, I have a prescription) before I started the work today, and I was able to work for about five hours before simple exhaustion overcame me (rather than the sneezing and allergy-related misery I experienced Friday night.)

After all my yard work was done, I decided to take a break and play a little poker at PokerStars, so I hopped into a 4-player heads-up sit-n-go (I was inspired after watching the Heads-up Championship on NBC this morning.) I really like those matches, because most of the players at the lower buy-ins are very straightforward (so you know your pair of kings is no good when they bet into you on an A-high board) and you only have to beat two players to win three buy-ins, instead of 8 players in a regular sit-n-go. At one point, my first round opponent had me down to just a few big blinds, but I got insanely lucky and bounced back, tilting him in the process and taking it down. My second round opponent had the classic online tell: he'd check the "check/fold" box when he was in the BB if he didn't like his hand, so I'd call and if he insta-checked, I knew I could bet no matter what on the flop and get him to fold. I rode the right combination of luck and trusting my reads to victory, turning my mighty five dollar buy-in into twenty dollars when I flopped TP and a flush draw with AT and got him to call me with KT when my flush missed.

Okay, now it's time to go watch The Simpsons, in the lame hope that it manges to be funny this week.

Uh, okay, the whole opening bit with the attacking couches? Brilliant. Even if the rest of the show veers off into that weird Jesusland they've been hitting so frequently this season, that was worth the price of admission.

Wait. The baseball bit? Very funny. This "homer is the relationship counselor" bit? The polar opposite of funny. Are they hiring old 1970s sit-com writers? This is like a rejected Three's Company script. Give me another monorail, please. Please, I beg you.

Posted by Wil at 8:22 PM | Permalink | Comments (17)

Two out of three deadheads make me stabby, but since I first heard American Beauty when I was in my teens, I've considered myself a casual fan of the Grateful Dead. Put into nerd terms: I'd go to a Star Trek convention, but I wouldn't go in a spacesuit. Well, maybe in a spacesuit, but certainly not with a latex forehead. And I'm not following Avery Brooks around the country in a van; that's where I draw the line, man.

While I never wanted to go to a live show, (goddamn hippies with their patchouli and their hemp pants) I absolutely love listening to recordings of their shows, and I've spent a lot of time with some of Dick's Picks, because the Dead are probably the best example of a band that makes good records, but takes their music to an entirely different level when it's played live. For an example of that, pick up just about any live Dead recording where they play Darkstar, and make it last for six hours without ever getting lame, or pick up this 1971 show linked below and listen to The Other One -> Me and My Uncle -> The Other One. Wow.

I haven't listened to the Dead in a long time, but earlier this month Pauly advised everyone to pick up the August 6, 1971 show from the Palladium in Los Angeles from archive.org. Because everyone else was doing it, and I wanted to be popular, I grabbed it, unzipped it, and didn't listen to it until this morning.

Wow. What a great show this is, and how surprising that it was recorded at the Palladium, which is probably the worst venue in the entire city. The energy, the quality of the recording, and the cool, bluesy strains of their songs is just perfect writing music for today: it's 79 degrees, my patio is covered with finches squabbling over the bird feeders, my dogs are sleeping at my feet, and a gentle breeze is carrying the smell of recently-transplanted lavender into the window.

A few minutes ago, I followed a link to the 2+2 forums, and found that cool Firefox/Grateful Dead mashup image as an avatar, and took it as a sign that I should post something about this cool music I'm enjoying today, and spread firefox.

Hey, everyone else is doing it - I just want to be popular.

Posted by Wil at 11:45 AM | Permalink | Comments (17)

A few months ago, remixed movie trailers started showing up all over the place, the best of them being The Shining redone as a romantic comedy.

This morning, I saw a trailer for Stand By Me, which remixes it into something rather different than the film we made twenty years ago.

(Thanks to everyone who sent me the link.)

Posted by Wil at 9:13 AM | Permalink | Comments (29)

I've spent all my time today catching up with all the things I've wanted to put into my blog over the last few weeks, but haven't had the time or energy to complete. This is the last bit of the Catching Up Trilogy, soon to be a major motion picture starring Jack Black as the cab driver, Jimmy Kimmel's Cousin as Wil Wheaton, and a special appearance by William Fucking Shatner, as himself.

"I wrote earlier today about not having time, and feeling like there isn't enough time for things, and I think the conclusion I've reached from this already-too-long post is that we have to give ourselves permission to make time for the things we really want to do. In my case, I need to have full access to my creative brain. Fear is the enemy of creativity, and I have to just stop being afraid of not providing for my family enough, so I can write some creative things that will provide for them."

More Than This

I have to say this, so I can get over it once and for all: Most of my experience with the release of Just A Geek completely sucked. Rather than building on the momentum I created with Dancing Barefoot, I felt like I was right back where I started, when the whole thing was finally over. I felt taken advantage of, mislead, and ultimately just discarded. That book was really my baby, and the damn publisher handled it (and me) so poorly, it was just devastating to me.

When it became apparent to me that the publisher wasn't going to market it correctly, and when I realized that the company was never interested in doing more with it than just cashing in on my blog and the audience I'd worked so hard to create, I felt like a total chump. I worked harder on Just A Geek, and spent more time and energy on promoting it and making sure it was as good as it could be, and I actually earned less, and sold fewer with a major publisher than I did with Dancing Barefoot, publishing it on my own. In fact, the only real publicity efforts or signings that had any impact on sales were ones I set up myself, or came to me because of my blog. Yeah, that was really worth the huge nightmare of constantly begging them not to promote it as a Sci-Fi book or a Star Trek bio, only to be ignored or dismissed. Never again will I rely upon a publisher to do what they said they would do, and never again will I ignore the instincts I've spent a lifetime developing when they warn me that something just isn't right.

"You have to do another book like Dancing Barefoot," Anne told me last summer, "because we had such a good time with it, and you're too stubborn and passionate to work for anyone, anyway. Then you'll feel better about the whole thing."

She was right, of course, and the idea for Do You Want Kids With That? to be another small book very similar to Dancing Barefoot was born.

The entire process of working on that manuscript was very similar to the Barefoot experience: I spent long hours on my Debian machine, cutting and pasting stuff from my blog and editing it in OpenOffice.org, and sending tons of files back and forth with my friend Andrew, who edited almost all of Dancing Barefoot, and the first two drafts of Just A Geek with me.

Our goal was to have it out by November of last year, but in the early weeks of October, I realized that it wasn't going to work. The problem was easy to identify: though it was a collection of several short stories all relating to my experiences as a stepfather, it was essentially the same story over and over again: I love my stepkids, and I love it so much when I can feel them accept me and I see myself reflected in them. It's hard to be a stepparent, but it's totally worth all the extra work. That's great for about three short stories, and the occasional blog entry, but anything longer than that is just too much, and it gets old. I know how to fix it, but I am just not willing to tear the curtains back on Ryan and Nolan's lives the same way I'm willing to do it on my own, and without doing that, I can't write additional stories that will give the final draft the ebb and flow it needs to truly work. I also don't want to spend a whole lot of time and energy talking about what a jerk Anne's ex-husband is, and how hard he's worked (and continues to work) to drive a wedge between the kids and me, which is very important context to understand just how remarkable it is that I have any relationship with them at all, let alone the fantastic, loving, trusting, bonded one we do have.

But I had material that was written and edited, and it seemed foolish to let it go to waste, so I pulled together three of the stories that I liked the most, and Andrew helped me edit them into the chapbook More Than This.

Every step of the way, from the selection of material, to the re-writing and editing, to the layout and printing and release, made me insanely happy. I felt like I was in charge of my life, and helping to support my family by doing something I love, and don't totally suck at. (Yes, I realize the irony of saying that I don't suck at writing while ending a sentence in a preposition. With. At. Of.)

(At.)

I felt like I could finally feel good about writing and publishing again, and a lot of the unhappiness and frustration and depression that tainted and then ruined the Just A Geek experience was washed away. It was like Dancing Barefoot all over again, and I couldn't have been happier:

When I picked up my chapbooks from the printer, I had the same happiness and sense of fulfillment that I had when Dancing Barefoot first arrived at my house almost exactly three years ago.

When I took them to the Grand Slam convention, and people expressed an interest in reading them, I felt the same excitement that I felt when people picked up the first pre-release, I-made-them-at-Kinko's copies of Dancing Barefoot at the same convention in 2003.

When I created the blog entry about the chapbook, and orders started to come in, I felt the same surprise, excitement, happiness and joy I felt when Dancing Barefoot was first accepting orders. In fact, I saw a lot of names that I recognized from back then, and felt doubly happy that so many of you reading this have continued to come back for so many years. (There are a lot of places you can visit on the Internets, and there's a lot of media competing for your time and attention; that you choose to spend some of it with me makes me feel very, very happy, and I'll continue to do my very best to earn your time and honor your support.)

When I filled the orders for the chapbook, and Anne and Ryan helped me put them into envelopes and apply the stamps, I felt the same happiness and excitement that I felt during the summer of Dancing Barefoot's first release, when Anne and I sat in our living room with our friends and stuffed envelopes, applied postage and mailing labels, and took them to the post office for shipping.

Man, the summer of 2003 was so much fun: Anne and I took our ultra-awesome  road trip to Tulsa  for the Trek Expo, where Dancing Barefoot sold out, I did signings at Powell's in Portland and Mysterious Galaxy in San Diego, and I couldn't wait to get Just A Geek (which was already in production at the time) finished, so I could build upon all that momentum. It's the happiest I think I've been since we got married, which remains the happiest day of my life (as cliche as that sounds.) Everything was working back then; my writing was clear and interesting (to me, anyway) and everything was coming up Millhouse. I expected the same success and excitement -- better, even -- with Just A Geek, and when it became painfully clear that it wasn't coming, and in fact was designed not to come, it made the crash from the Dancing Barefoot high that much more painful (obviously, as I still lingers a little bit today.)

The More Than This experience is like Dancing Barefoot, only smaller and more intimate this time. I really, really like that. I sincerely hope that those of you who ordered copies (the first shipment is arriving, according to e-mail, and the second shipment is going out as soon as I post this and drive to the post office) feel like your time and money is well-spent.

I don't know what will come next on the literary front. I've been working so hard to keep my head above water with my "for hire" work, I haven't had the time to just take a long walk up the mountain and see what I bring back. I have some fiction ideas, one in particular that is very exciting to me and may get out of the "wouldn't it be cool if . . ." stage and enter the "I'm working on a story about . . ." stage. I've also thought about collecting the best of my blog twice a year, and doing limited print runs like More Than This, with added commentary and a few other things that should make it worth your time. I am also going to take the material that would have been in Do You Want Kids With That? and turn it into an audiobook, unlike anything else that's out there right now (to the best of my knowledge) and release that in the near future, sort of like Just A Geek: The Audiobook.

I told my friend Shane a couple of days ago, "starting tonight, i vow to spend less time online, less time playing poker, and more time reading books, listening to music, exercising, and enjoying the things in life that are worth enjoying -- it's just not worth it to be tied to the fucking computer all day, every day."

I think that's good advice for tracking down my inspiration and finding my writing muse again. I can't expect to hit a single home run if I don't take batting practice, you know?

Here's an interesting bonus result from my blogging today: in the process of catching up, I feel like I've purged a ton of stuff that's been clogging me up for a long time, and I was able to sit down at my dining room table, pull out a pen and a piece of paper, and sketch out a WWdN 2.0 layout for my friend Russ to work on. He says it's awesome, and can have the new design ready really soon. I may just get to leave Exile before Duke Nuke 'Em Forever ships. Everything happens for a reason . . . maybe I needed to get all this out so I could go home, and pack up for that long walk up the mountain.

Posted by Wil at 5:13 PM | Permalink | Comments (41)

I've been too busy to write about some cool things that I've experienced, recently. I'm taking the next few hours to catch up . . .

Free Comic Book Day

In 2003, I took Ryan and Nolan to Free Comic Book Day at my local comic shop, Comics Factory in Pasadena (Colorado, just West of Hill, if you're ever in the area). It's a great shop, run by people who love comics and really take care of their customers.

FCBD is exactly what it sounds like: a day when you get to choose from a bunch of different comics -- for free -- at your friendly local comic shop. The idea is to get new people interested in reading comics and graphic novels, as well as convincing current readers to give a different book or genre a risk-free try. (Note to industry: how about Free Game Day?)

When I took the kids two years ago, they picked up a bunch of X-Men and Batman and stuff, and were really into comic books for about three weeks before losing interest and returning to Harry Potter (Ryan) and Reading Sucks (Nolan, who has grown into quite the reader in the last 1 months) I, on the other hand, picked up Fables, which is the coolest Vertigo title since Sandman, and found my love of comic books re-kindled. For most of a year, I went into the comic shop twice a month and picked up new books and read them all. I was terribly sad when I had to admit that I couldn't justify the time and money invested, though, and I didn't read much more than a few graphic novels for most of 2005.

So I have a pile of great books from Free Comic Book Day that I think I'm going to read this afternoon, as soon as I finish my writing commitments for today.

Uh-oh. Commence rambling:

I love to watch and read Sci-Fi and Fantasy. I love to play geeky games like Illuminati and Talisman and Frank's Zoo. I love to read comic books, and I wish I had the time to paint 40K armies and go to gaming cons and comic cons and just be a total nerd. I want to go for a hike to Echo Mountain, and I want to go Geocaching. I wish I had time to go out to plays and hear live music and see midnight movies and take my family on trips to see things like Yellowstone and the Smithsonian, or just go to the beach and enjoy one of the reasons we still live in Southern California.

Somewhere in the last couple of years, I've allowed my sense of responsibility and my need to be a good father, husband, and provider completely overwhelm me. I've lost a sense of Balance in my life, and all those cool nerdy things that defined me for so much of my life are struggling to get up there and have the floor, too.

When I went to Free Comic Book Day this year, I felt a connection to some of the happiest days of my life, those days when I sat on the floor at Darin's house and we read Sandman, and Killing Joke, and Dark Knight Returns together. The smell of paper and cardboard and books and that nerd-funk that can't be described reminded me of all the hours I spent in game stores like The Last Grenadier, and the hours I spent at home reading Uncle Albert's and rolling up GURPS characters, just because I could.

I fully realize that an adult with two kids and a mortgage can't have the sort of time and freedom to goof off the way he did when he was a teenager, but I think there has to be some way, even as an adult, to find Balance, and give yourself permission to goof off from time to time. You know that saying, "We don't stop playing because we get old, we get old because we stop playing"? I grok.

Oh, which actually brings up another interesting observation: In On Writing, Stephen King says that you can't expect to be a creative writer if you don't make the time to read. All the really good poker players I know say a similar thing about playing cards: if you don't make time to study your game, and talk with other players who you respect, you can't expect to play your best game. The same thing goes for athletes; they say that Tony Gwynn and Ted Williams took more batting practice than anyone else on their teams, and Michael Jordan spent more time practicing free throws and anyone else on the Bulls. It makes sense, doesn't it?

I wrote earlier today about not having time, and feeling like there isn't enough time for things, and I think the conclusion I've reached from this already-too-long post is that we have to give ourselves permission to make time for the things we really want to do. In my case, I need to have full access to my creative brain. Fear is the enemy of creativity, and I have to just stop being afraid of not providing for my family enough, so, uh, I can write some creative things that will provide for us.

That segues nicely into part three, coming later.

Posted by Wil at 1:21 PM | Permalink | Comments (16)

I've been too busy to write about some cool things that I've experienced, recently. I'm taking the next few hours to catch up . . .

kyle + rosemary

The kyle + rosemary recording session was as much fun as I thought it would be. Jun cast a brilliant woman to play Rosemary, whose voice combined perfectly with her character model, and made it easy for me to commit to Kyle's head-over-heels crush on her.

I've never been particularly good at doing voices, but with Jun's help, I found a voice for Kyle that was soft and sweet and a little insecure, that I was really, really happy with.

Jun (director / creator) and Jentle (voice of Rosemary) were great fun to collaborate with, and we had a great time riffing together and discovering some funny stuff that surprised us all. One of my favorite moments was trying to come up with something to replace "severed head," which the S&P folks had decided was forbidden. We tried a few different things, and Jun settled on replacing the severed head with a skull. I suggested we make it a flaming skull, because "everything is funnier when you set it on fire." 

I saw Don the Coolest Guard in the World when I went in, but he wasn't there when I left, so I didn't get to thank him personally. I heard from a few people at Nickelodeon that someone did show him my blog, though, so he knows. I hope I get to go back to Nickelodeon soon and shake his hand.

kyle + rosemary is not a sold pilot; it's a short film that will be considered by Nickelodeon for series development early next year. When I have more information about when it's airing and how you can watch it, I'll let you know.

Legion of Super Heroes

I've done two episodes of Legion so far, and I go back for another one tomorrow. I really can't say anything about it, because the Warner Animation Goonsquad will totally come after me and take away my super powers . . . but it's just amazing, and I think people are really, really going to like it.

More later . . .

Posted by Wil at 11:37 AM | Permalink | Comments (7)

There just isn't enough time.

There isn't enough time to do everything I want to do with my kids.
There isn't enough time to take long walks with my wife.
There isn't enough time to work on my yard.
There isn't enough time to work on my house.
There isn't enough time to get out and live life to the fullest.
There isn't enough time to seek out and embrace inspiration.
There isn't enough time to write great stories.
There isn't enough time to play games.

There just isn't enough time.

Posted by Wil at 11:22 AM | Permalink | Comments (19) | TrackBacks (1)

Initially, I thought this (possible spoilers) would be a fun puzzle-solving game to play over the summer, while waiting for season three to start, figuring out what Dharma is about, Hanso Foundation rabbits with Persephone . . . but after last week's Sprite tie-in, and last night's stupid Jeep commercial, I'm beginning to think the big secret message from The Hanso Foundation will be "Be sure to drink your Ovaltine."

Technorati Tags: lost, hanso foundation, lost experience

Posted by Wil at 10:12 AM | Permalink | Comments (23)

You know you're playing too much Guitar Hero when you see the Arena Rock Essentials at the iTunes Music Store and think, "Dude, I totally need to buy that."

Afterthought: If you could pick three songs for Guitar Hero II, what would they be?

I'd pick:

• Money by Pink Floyd
• Miserlou by Dick Dale
• One by Metallica

Ryan would pick:

• Rude Mood by Stevie Ray Vaughn
• Stairway to Heaven by Led Zeppelin
• Hot for Teacher by Van Halen

Nolan would pick:

• I Need to do My Homework, So Don't Bother Me by I Am Nolan's Responsibility

Anne would pick:

• How about you play less Guitar Hero? by Guitar Hero Widows, Inc.

Technorati Tags: guitar hero

Posted by Wil at 2:38 PM | Permalink | Comments (34)

Spring is totally here in Pasadena: it's misty or foggy in the mornings, and cool enough to wear a shell when I jog around the neighborhood. Then it burns off around noon and we enjoy cool breezes and temperatures in the mid 70s until the sun goes down. It's perfect planting, barbequing, and sitting-on-the-patio-with-a-nice-cigar weather. The thing is, our patio (and all of our yard, actually) has really gone to hell over Winter, so Ryan and Nolan and I gave Anne a landscaped and cleaned up yard for Mother's Day.

I spent the entire day yesterday up to my knees in turned soil and roly poly bugs while my dogs did their best to help me out by digging holes where I'd recently stuck some new plants into the ground. The kids helped clean out overgrown grasses and piles of leaves we'd allowed to collect in the corners of the yard, and Anne and I transplanted some huge lavender bushes from the front yard to the planter beneath our kitchen window (boy, the fragrance of lavender drifting through that window can almost make washing dishes not completely suck.)

The smell of wet grass and freshly turned earth is everywhere: when I sit in my office, it comes up from the back yard; when I take my Powerbook into my living room and sit on the couch (where I am right now,) it comes in from the patio . . . and there are birds everywhere! I hung bird feeders with songbird mix and socks filled with Nyjer seed all around my yard, and filled up the birdbath on the patio as the sun was setting last night, and this morning there are close to thirty birds, from gold finches to blue jays to white tufted titmouses (titmice?) singing and chirping and making my yard the peaceful sanctuary I've always wanted it to be.

The best part? I spent $139 dollars on plants and soil and fertilizer and crap, and the looks and feels more like a thousand bucks. In about a month, if these plants take off the way we think they will, Anne and I are going to have several flowerbeds filled with beautiful native plants.

There's still work to be done: the elm needs to be thinned, the palm tree needs to be cleaned up before it can dump sixty pounds of seeds and junk into my grass, and I have an entirely overgrown side yard that needs to be totally cleaned out and landscaped (it's been the "let's do that next" project since we moved in six years ago), but the work we did this weekend -- as a family, no less -- is just awesome. I have lately felt like I'm working very hard without a whole lot to show for it, and it gives me a much-needed sense of accomplishment to walk into my back yard and see the results of the work we did. I wish I'd taken before and after photos, because it's pretty incredible.

I've been writing all morning, and now I can go out into the back and enjoy its growing sense of peace and sanctuary. I may even take a cigar with me, just because I can.

Posted by Wil at 1:05 PM | Permalink | Comments (32) | TrackBacks (1)

People always advise their friends and family to get up and watch the sunrise. That's a great idea, because experiencing the world early in the morning when she's waking up can be a magical and inspiring experience, but don't neglect the full moon.

You get 365 chances each year to get up and watch Father Sun, in russet mantle clad, climb yon Eastward hill, but Mother Moon only grows fat once a month, so the next time you know she'll be full, grab a telescope, some binoculars, or a person you love and head out into the back yard for a look.

Posted by Wil at 9:21 AM | Permalink | Comments (16)

"The NSA would like to remind everyone to call their mothers this Sunday.  They need to calibrate their system."

(via Bruce Schneier. Image via boingboing)

Posted by Wil at 1:41 PM | Permalink | Comments (13) | TrackBacks (4)

A lot of people have asked me about Americanizing Shelly, the film I worked on last year as director Alan Smithee.

I haven't said much about it, because I didn't know what I could talk about and what I had to keep on the down-low, but I just read this story from the swnewsherald about the production:

The film tells the story of a wannabe Hollywood talent manager’s quest to Americanize an Indian girl from the Himalayas. As he teaches her about the “American way of life,” they begin to see the world through each other’s eyes.

I didn't know this when I worked on it, but one of the co-producers was just seventeen years-old! I'm totally blown away; we only spoke on the phone and via e-mail, but if I hadn't read this article, I would have thought she was a typical, experienced film-maker.[1] Good on ya, Natasha!

I also just discovered that the film has a website, which currently features a teaser trailer that includes me, in all my "incompetent director" glory. Right on.

[1] Oops. Mistaken identity. We never spoke with each other. However, it's still incredibly cool that a seventeen year-old got involved with the making of a movie (which I've just found out looks great and is cracking up all the people who have seen it during editing.)

Posted by Wil at 6:51 PM | Permalink | Comments (36)

My quest to play Guitar Hero 2 at E3 was a success! I played bass and I played lead in co-op mode on Van Halen's "You Really Got Me" (at the Vans Warped Tour, because they've licensed some real locations this time around) hitting 97% and 98% respectively. "Strutter" by KISS seemed to be the most popular song for people to try out, with "War Pigs" by Sabbath coming in a close second. I could have easily spent the entire day there, rocking all eight songs they had available for demo play, but there was a growing line of other wanna-be rockers waiting, and I didn't want to bogart the whole stage, man.

While I waited to play, I talked with some of the developers, who were all really, really cool guys, and told me something rather exciting about GH2:

Les Claypool gave RedOctane the master tracks for John The Fisherman, so when you play it in Guitar Hero 2, you'll be playing along with Les, Larry "Ler" Lamond, and Tim "Herb" Alexander, just like you were with them in the studio recording Fizzle Fry.

read more | digg story

It was so nice to meet developers who aren't completely in love with themselves and appreciate geeks like me who play their games, you know? Their entuhsiasm reminded me of the entuhsiasm I felt when I worked at NewTek during the launch of the Video Toaster 4000: we all knew we were working on something totally cool and unique, but we still got excited when someone who used it geeked out at us about it. I know there are pictures of me getting my rock on, so if I can track them down, I'll post them here for maximum goat-throwing.

If you're going to E3 and you want to play GH2, don't bother fighting the crowds in the Sony booth (after you get past the 6 hour-long line of people waiting to play with the Wii). Go down to the Kentia Hall, and find the Red Octane booth. The lines are shorter, you can talk with the developers, and they've got GH2 posters and pins to give away. When you're done rocking out, you can stay in Kentia hall and see an absolutely amazing history of video games exhibit, featuring playable Colecovision, Vectrex, Intellivision, Apple //e, Atari 2600 and other console systems, as well as look-but-don't-touch collections of classic handhelds like the Tomytronic Pac-Man and Milton Bradley's Macrovision. There are also about 20 arcade games down there, set for free play, including Tempest, Black Widow, Stargate, Tron, Gorf, and Crystal Castles.

UPDATE: There's a picture of me in front of the Gorf, Donkey Kong, and Tempest machines from Ars here. For those of you scoring at home, of the machines in that picture, I played Gorf and Tempest, and I was incredibly sad that Gorf didn't have any sound. It implied that I was a Spaaace Ca-det, though, which I answered by blasting the Flagship out of the sky. Who's laughing now, Gorf?! Me! That's who! Me, baby! ME!

In the picture, I'm wearing a shirt featuring the code from Konami, which I got from Think Geek. I realized as I was parking my car for E3 (I missed the train so I had to drive. Yay.) that I was kind of wearing the band's T-shirt to its concert like a total dork. However, I got my rock on so hard on Guitar Hero 2, I'm really okay with that.

Posted by Wil at 10:45 AM | Permalink | Comments (14) | TrackBacks (1)

I'm getting ready to hop on the train and go down to E3, to do an hour on GameSpy's Livewire program with David Lawrence. I'll be on at noon Pacific time, and you can tune in for audio goodness through the Livewire website, but you have to register for the video goodness. Sorry about that; it's beyond my control. I'm pretty sure it's an interactive show, too, so come out and represent the posse if you're in a representin' mood, dogg. Uh, yo. Word. Westsieeeeeeeed.

When I'm done with that, my official quest to play Guitar Hero 2 will begin, which makes this the first time in three years that I'm actually excited to go to E3. Rock.

Posted by Wil at 9:23 AM | Permalink | Comments (19)

Activision bought RedOctane, the company responsible for Guitar Hero. Hopefully, this means more money for development, and not a bunch of corporate idiots screwing up my favorite game of 2006. Whatever comes of the partnership, epic congratulations to everyone at RedOctane (edited to add: and Harmonix! How could I forget Harmonix? -2 for me) who worked so hard to make the greatest fucking game in the history of me rocking out in my living room. You guys rock at least 97% of Cowboys From Hell on Expert, and I hope to throw some goats your way on Wednesday (which officially begins here in Los Angeles in 40 minutes) at E3.

Ryan and I have been having some serious Guitar Hero jam sessions recently. Last night, I finally five-starred Killer Queen and Fat Lip, and Ryan five-starred Stellar and Unsung (on medium; the kid slows down so he can play with the old man, which the old man appreciates.)

After I'd pulled a 99% on Killer Queen, I unwound with some Godzilla. As the song started up, Ryan said, "Dude, I think I hear cowbell in this song!"

I laughed a little bit, but maintained my focus: Yellow, blue, red green, yellowblueyellllooooowwwwww red yellow greenred . . . ROCK!

Ryan hopped up off the couch, and ran into the kitchen. A few moments later, he appeared back in the living room, a saucepan in one hand, and a wooden spoon in the other.

"What are you doing?" I said. Yellow, blue, yellowwwwwwww redyellow greenyellow rest yellowblue yellooowwwwwwww Star Power!

He held the saucepan about chest high, and began to tap it with the wooden spoon. "This song needs more cowbell," he said, "and this the closest I could get."

I played about twelve more notes before I collapsed into song-ending giggles.

Posted by Wil at 6:51 AM | Permalink | Comments (11) | TrackBacks (1)

I wanted to have something new and cool to show off when I went to the Grand Slam Sci-Fi Summit back in March, so I worked like crazy and made a very limited edition chapbook called More Than This, which is a few stories from the Do You Want Kids With That? manuscript (which is a book similar to Dancing Barefoot, but all about stepparenting.)

I wanted it to be something really cool and worth having, so in addition to three stories that I really like, I asked Ben Claassen to do an illustration like the ones he did for Dancing Barefoot, and I asked my stepson Ryan if he'd write a foreword. Luckily for us all, they both agreed, and the result is really cool, if I say so myself.

I only made 200 of these books, and sold 51 58 of them at the convention. Since I gave Ryan and Nolan numbers one and two respectively, that means there are 147 140 left in the whole entire universe, including the far off Dangot (that's pronounced "dang-oh," not "dan-got," which you may have heard) Nebula.

I was only going to make 100 for the convention, but it didn't cost that much to increase the run to 200, and I figured that I'd be able to offer whatever was left on this here website.

See where I'm going with this? I knew ya did!

If you'd like to pick up one of these limited-edition chapbooks, you can use the "Buy Now" button below. I'll sign the chapbook to whomever you want, and number it by hand with my very favorite squishy-handled pen. I'll keep this offer up as long as I have books, and of course I'll refund any orders that come in after they're all gone (assuming they sell out.)

One last thing: in the writing and editing process of Do You Want Kids With That?, my editor and I have come to the conclusion that it probably doesn't work as a full-length book (long story) but will almost certainly work very well as a 60-minute audiobook. So it's quite likely that this will be the only way you can get your hands on this material in any sort of book form.

If you're interested, here are the details:

More Than This - A Personalized, Autographed Chapbook by Wil Wheaton, featuring a foreword from my stepson Ryan.
Length: 20 pages.
Price: $25.00 (includes shipping)

Please allow 3-5 weeks for processing and shipping. At this time, I can only accept domestic US orders (international shipping is a real bitch for a small time operation like mine, and I have to increase the costs quite a bit to justify the extra time and work. Sorry.) If you have questions, put them in comments, so I can sort of FAQ it up. Thanks.

UPDATE: As of 8:30 PM PDT, there are just 75 left. 74 left (I thought I should probably set one aside for my mom.)

UPDATE AGAIN: As of 9:38 PM PDT there are just 32 left. Wow.

UPDATED AGAIN AGAIN: At 11:05 PM PDT, there are only 11 books left.

UPDATED ONE LAST TIME: It's 11:44 PM PDT, and all the books have been ordered, so I'm going to bed now. I'll start processing orders tomorrow after breakfast. Thanks to everyone who placed orders!

Posted by Wil at 5:00 PM | Permalink | Comments (69) | TrackBacks (1)

So it turns out that Eventful Demands really work! Thanks to everyone who demanded me in Boston (currently a staggering 209,) I was able to confidently contact a few bookstores and tell them that I was coming to town, with about 200 people who would come to their store, spend some money, and freak out the regulars.

As I've tried to put this together, I've learned that Boston has no shortage of outstanding bookstores, (especially indie book stores) and scheduling something for two days before the Fourth of July holiday is really, really hard . . . but I stuck at it, because this is such a unique opportunity to find out if decentralized tools and the power of the internets really does work for a guy like me.

On the advice of several WWdN:iX readers, I focused my attention and my efforts on Brookline Booksmith and Porter Square Books. If I was going to be in town for more than two days, I could probably do events at both stores, but since I'm only there for a brief time, (and because they called back first) I'll be at Brookline Booksmith on July 2nd. The store is working with the theatre across the street from the store to set up a screening of Stand By Me, followed by a Q&A with me. If they can get a print of the film, it will start at noon; otherwise, I'll just take the stage at one, do a reading from Just A Geek, and take some questions after. Either way, it's going to be really, really fun.

More details will come as they get worked out, but so far, here's what I have in easy-to-cut-n-paste form:

Who: Wil Wheaton, author, actor, cad, knave, raconteur.
What: Reading from Just A Geek, possible screening of Stand By Me.
Where: Brookline Booksmith - 279 Harvard Street Brookline, MA 02446
When: Sunday, July 2, 2006  - 12:00pm

This is really exciting for me. I feel the same level of anticipation and giddiness I felt when I was about to release Dancing Barefoot through Monolith Press, because this is something that I never could have done on my own (both practically, and courageously) and I can't wait to see how this whole thing turns out.

Now, I can turn my attention to taking care of Montreal, which is going to be a hell of a lot easier, I think.

Posted by Wil at 2:52 PM | Permalink | Comments (37) | TrackBacks (4)

I have pictures and stories about kyle + rosemary from yesterday, but I've got to go to the cleaners and get my tights on my way to Warner Brothers for my Legion of Super Heroes session that starts in an hour. Man, it's so weird (and so cool) to work two days in a row on different voice projects! If I've got anything left when I get home, I'll post about them both.

But if you're looking for something to read until then, here's your occasional linkfest to stuff I've written elsewhere in the last week, that you probably missed if you just read WWdN:iX:

Geek News @ Suicide Girls:

Earth's Artificial Ring - (This is probably my favorite story I've ever put onto the Geekwire.)

During the height of the Cold War, American scientists were also geeked out on the Ionosphere, because using it was the only reliable way to communicate over long distances, should ground-based microwave or undersea cable communication become unusable because of those godless commies. Not happy to accept the Ionosphere as nature intended it, they attempted to create an artificial Ionosphere by launching 480 million tiny copper needles into orbit, which briefly gave our planet an artificial ring in 1963.

The Last Webreference You'll Ever Need

Protolize breaks everything down into categories, from General to RSS to CMS and beyond, and then further sub-categorizes them into Tools, Resources, and Inspirations. Just about everything you need to take that idea in your head and make it something real online is gathered together in one place, and if there's a site you know of that isn't listed, adding it to the list is as simple as filling out a form. It's like Webmonkey meets del.icio.us, and exemplifies the power of sharing and organizing knowledge using the Internets.

Dude Tracks His Transatlantic Flight By Watching Internet Routing

The best part of Todd's blog post is his explanation of routing protocols and how the engineers at Boeing overcame what could have been service-crippling problems, including all sorts of really cool and useful graphics that even a level 010 geek can easily understand. In fact, if you grok and get excited by his story, you're probably on your way to being a level 1010 geek. If you understand what I'm talking about and are giggling right now, you're a level 101010 geek, and we're looking forward to seeing you at the meeting tonight. Excelsior!

Poker Stuff @ CardSquad:

In Washington State, Online Poker Players Are Now Class C Felons, Just Like Sex Offenders

Lawmakers in Washington state have decided that they know what's best for all their residents, and recently passed Senate Bill 6613, which "[reaffirms and clarifies] the prohibition against Internet and certain other interactive electronic or mechanical devices to engage in gambling."

I am the UltraGigli (note: in poker blogger land, Gigli is what we call the first person to be knocked out of a tourney. At the WPBT events in Vegas, the first person eliminated gets a copy of Gilgli on DVD from Dr. Pauly.)

Since I was Gigli'd in back-to-back tourneys, first with Aces and then with Kings, I now declare that I am the JLo's glorious ass part of Gigli. I am, in fact, the UltraGigli.

REVIEW: Phil Gordon's Little Green Book of Poker

During the 2005 WPT Championship at Bellagio, I had the great fortune of spending some time with Phil -- not at the same table, thank gods -- and he really helped me a lot.

[. . .]

We had dinner together at the end of the first day, and Phil gave me a bit of a lesson while we ate. When we were done, he told me that he was working on a little book that would compile lots of useful information from existing works by Caro and Sklansky, filtered through and expanded upon by Phil's personal experience. He was particularly excited about the tournament chapter, and all the math he'd done to figure out very reliably how often players needed to steal blinds, and make moves to survive into the deeper levels of play. He graciously offered to e-mail me a copy of the manuscript so I could read it over later that night, and it significantly helped my game. The book, of course, became Phil Gordon's Little Green Book: Lessons and Teachings in No Limit Texas Hold'em.

Thanks for reading!

Posted by Wil at 12:59 PM | Permalink | Comments (12)

I'm kind of crazy in love with Guitar Hero. Does that make me weird?
 
I have a list of seven songs for Guitar Hero II, as well as some awesome rumors about the sequel, at the SGGeekwire, and I dugg a site that has tablatures for all the songs available in the current Guitar Hero.

The only reason I'm suffering through E3 this year is so I can play this game, and write about the quest. Somehow, I'm pretty confident it's going to be worth it.

Technorati Tags: guitar hero 2, gaming

Posted by Wil at 12:36 PM | Permalink | Comments (14) | TrackBacks (1)

I was supposed to take Nolan to the Dodger game on Wednesday, but he opted to stay home and work on a history project, because he wants to get the best grade possible. "There will be a lot of Dodger games this year," he said on Tuesday, "but if I blow it on this project, I don't get a second chance. I'm sorry we can't go together."

Longtime readers of my blog know how that made me feel, and I'm still proud of him, three days later.

Since I already bought our tickets, I called my brother Jeremy and asked him if he'd like to go in Nolan's place. He accepted, and we had an absolute blast at the game, even though the Dodger bullpen is painfully bad this year.

I blogged it, live-to-Molskine, and transcribed the whole thing at blogging.la:

7:47 PM - Navarro is up with the bases empty. I say to Jeremy, "You know, not only can Navarro not make the throw to second, he can't hit, either." The words are barely out of my mouth when Navarro slams the second pitch about 380' for a solo homer. Jeremy says, "Yes! Get angry at my brother, Navarro! Who's up next? You also suck!"

7:50 PM - The kid in front of us to our left has a chocolate malt with a wooden spoon-shaped thing. I guess the plastic spoon was just user error. Whew.

7:55 PM - Seo has a really great curveball.

7:58 PM - Piazza breaks up the no-hitter with a double to the wall in center-right. Whatever. He's still totally gay (not that there's anything wrong with that.) Jeremy blames me because I pointed out that Seo had a no-hitter through four.

8:01 PM - Middle of the 4th, and they're doing that Coca Cola answer a question and win a coke thing down on the field. The guy gets it right, and a really hot girl walks off the field with him. I say, "Hey, she thinks she's getting his coke, and doesn't even know it's soda!" Jeremy says, "Yeah, she's toatally a Coke whore." We think we're the funniest guys in the world. High-five.

8:06 PM - Kent is up with runners at the corners. I say to Jeremy, "You know, the problem with Kent is that he's really on the downside of his career. Not only does he stuggle to turn two, he can't come through in the clutch with runners at the corners." I look down at the field and say, "Your move, Mister Kent." Unfortunately, my Navarro-fu doesn't work and Kent is out.

Posted by Wil at 10:27 AM | Permalink | Comments (24)

The April 19th issue of The Onion arrived in my mailbox yesterday (it is a massive perk of being an AV Club contributor) and it's one of the funniest complete issues I've read in months. Seriously, from top to bottom this one is so funny, it makes you want to write hyperbolic statements that begin, "Seriously, from top to bottom . . ."

My two favorite stories are Drunk Will Show You, Everybody

YOUNGSTOWN, OH—In response to the shit he knows everyone is saying about him, local resident Todd Stenerud, after a prolonged drinking session, announced his intention to show you and everyone else just minutes before closing time at a local bar Monday.

"You people don't know [what] the fuck you're talking about," Stenerud announced from his stool at Dan's Pub. "You think I can't? Know what? I'll show you. I'll show everybody."

And the op-ed Baby, You Mean the World of Warcraft to Me

Come on, honey, why do you have to be like that? You know that you're my Elven princess. My one and only. I would dare say that there is no one in all the realm who doesn't know of our love. I have sung your praises from the mouth of the Shadowthread Cave to the Stranglethorn Vale of the Eastern Kingdoms. I've introduced you to my comrades-in-arms in the Ulster guild, and they all accept you as kin.

And now you want to dissolve the greatest love ever to brighten my basement?

As long as I'm linking to Onion-related funny, the AV Club's Summer Movie Preview, titled "Why Bother?" is out:

[E]very summer arrives with at least a few movies that threaten to give popcorn escapism a good name, movies like last year's Batman Begins and War Of The Worlds. With that in mind, The A.V Club humbly presents a list of reasons why you're probably better off skipping the multiplexes altogether this summer. Of course, we could be wrong.

X-Men: The Last Stand

What it's about: Those nutty X-Men are at it again, this time dealing with the ramifications of a supposed cure for mutants.

Why it's probably a waste of time: Four words: "Directed by Brett Ratner." No wait, six more words: "With Kelsey Grammer as The Beast."

Why it might be worth seeing anyway: Ratner's most infuriating trait, his inability to create a distinct directorial style, might serve him well here. The trailer makes this look like one of Bryan Singer's X-Men films. If Ratner apes those well enough, it might be okay.

Finally, I think this week's Games of our Lives, Circus Charlie, is pretty funny, if I do say so myself.

Gameplay: Are you ready to jump? You'd better be, because that's about all you'll be doing in Circus Charlie. There are six different levels, and the objectives range from easy (jumping through hoops of fire while riding a lion, jumping over monkeys while walking on a tightrope) to more difficult (jumping from one bouncy ball or trampoline to another) to nearly impossible (jumping from a moving horse to a springboard and back).

To succeed in Circus Charlie, you'll need to carefully use the joystick to set your speed as you time your jumps. However, that's the only skill you'll need to master, and once you've got that down, it'll be easy to reach for the high score—and to collect all the bags of money on each level so you can give yourself a sensual massage in all their bonus-point-delivering glory.

Could be mistaken for: Track & Field, Jump Jump Revolution

I remember being so disappointed the first time I played Circus Charlie back in the 80s, and how furious I was when I inadvertently played it several months later, unsure if it was "that one stupid jumping game that really sucked." In the quarter-centric economy of 1985, it was a significant hit to my otherwise robust portfolio, which was frequently invested in Mr. Do! and Super Pac-Man, with a much more successful return.

Posted by Wil at 4:13 PM | Permalink | Comments (11)

I had an incredibly vivid dream just before I woke up today about an earthquake, and when I got out of bed, I saw that there'd been a huge 'quake near Tonga.

I'm going to take a nap now, and hope that I dream about the Dodgers not blowing a huge lead late in the game, because my brother and I are going to the game tonight.

Posted by Wil at 2:15 PM | Permalink | Comments (9) | TrackBacks (1)

For weeks, I've been trying to write about why Network Neutrality is so important, and why everyone who spends even three minutes a day online should be writing, calling, and faxing their representatives in Congress relentlessly until the so-called First Amendment of the Internet is guaranteed and becomes law. But whenever I start, I end up angry and depressed and frustrated, and the words just won't come.

Today, Adam Green has a brilliant post at HuffPo that puts into simple language exactly why Network Neutrality is so important:

As the New York Times editorialized today:

 

"Net neutrality" is a concept that is still unfamiliar to most Americans, but it keeps the Internet democratic. ... One of the Internet's great strengths is that a single blogger or a small political group can inexpensively create a Web page that is just as accessible to the world as Microsoft's home page. But this democratic Internet would be in danger if the companies that deliver Internet service changed the rules so that Web sites that pay them money would be easily accessible, while little-guy sites would be harder to access and slower to navigate. Providers could also block access to sites they do not like.

If Net Neutrality is gutted, Google, eBay, and YouTube either pay protection money to companies like AT&T or risk that their sites process slowly on your computer. Comcast could intentionally slow access to iTunes, steering Internet customers its own music service. And the little guy with the next big idea would be muscled out of the marketplace, relegated to the "slow lane" of the information superhighway.

This isn't just speculation -- it's already happened in places without Net Neutrality. Heck, AT&T's CEO blatantly announced, "The Internet can't be free."

That's why an Internet revolt has begun--a revolt that [Telecom spokesman Mike] McCurry belittles. Folks as diverse as Craig from Craigslist, MoveOn, Gun Owners of America,  Google, eBay, and Amazon are all fighting back. 350,000 people signed a petition demanding Congress preserve Internet freedom, over 2,000 blogs have rallied the public, and even some celebrities are chiming in.

Craig Fields from Gun Owners of America hit the target right-on when he said

"Whenever you see people on the far left and far right joining together about something Congress is getting ready to do, it's been my experience that what Congress is getting ready to do is basically un-American."

(Emphasis mine)

There's much more to his post, including a smackdown of Mike McCurry, who has become and outright lying shill for powerful telecom interests like AT&T who want to force a fundamental change to the way the Internet operates. Please read it. I think it's the most important thing you'll read today, and should help everyone who's heard about this issue (but doesn't know exactly what it is -- which includes a lot of people, including myself until about last week) understand why it's so important.

On a personal note: without the Internet, I'd be just another failed actor struggling to make ends meet. Because I had the same ability to put together a website and reach an audience as anyone else, I was able to put my words on your screens, and eventually into a book that got into many of your hands. If AT&T or some other big telecom decided that regular guys like me had to pay some sort of protection money to have the same ability to reach you as Google or MSN does, I never would have been able to get WWdN off the ground, much less found Monolith Press, publish Dancing Barefoot, and start an entirely new career as a writer.

We've all taken for granted that we'll have equal access to the Internet, both as consumers and as creators of content. Right now, very powerful, very greedy, and very un-democratic businesses are trying very hard to take that away from us. They must be stopped.

Again, Adam Green:

The only way to protect Net Neutrality is for Congress to take action now, as it re-writes our nation's telecom laws. Senators Olympia Snowe (R-ME) and Byron Dorgan (D-ND) and Representative Ed Markey (D-MA) have introduced legislation to do this. Mike McCurry and his clients like AT&T are fighting it tooth and nail.

If you are outraged, don't just sit there . . .  take these steps:

1. SIGN a Net Neutrality petition to Congress:

2. CALL Congress now:

3. BLOG about this issue, or put our "Save the Internet" logo on your Web site:

4. MYSPACE: Add "Save the Internet" as a friend:

5. WRITE A LETTER to Congress:

6. VISIT our coalition Web site for more information, SavetheInternet.com

Posted by Wil at 3:43 PM | Permalink | Comments (35) | TrackBacks (4)

I was very spoiled by Teen Titans. It was a fantastically talented group of actors, writers, and animators, lead by passionate producers and one of the best directors I've ever had the pleasure of working with. I was crushed when the show was cancelled not only because it meant I wouldn't have the job, but because it meant that I wouldn't get to work with this incredible group of people several times a year any more.

When I found out that I would be working on Legion of Super Heroes, I was excited, but I kept my expectations in check . . . what were the odds of lightning striking twice?

Well, it turns out that those odds were 1:1. I had an absolute blast on Friday. The entire cast accepted me right away, and welcomed me into their show (they've been working together for eleven episodes, already) and made me feel like I was part of their team who had been there from the start. The producers, writers, and the director were just hawesome, and I can't wait to go back and work with them all again this week . . . because I'm a recurring character!

Oh yeah, baby. Recurring character. Sweet.

I know that Warner Brothers is very touchy about revealing too many details before they are announced (Marv Wolfman and I got our wrists slapped when we both mentioned something about Aqualad on our blogs when we worked together on Deep Six) but I got an okay from a highly-placed source to at least reveal that I am playing the part of Cosmic Boy, one of the founders of the Legion.

Finding Cosmic Boy's voice was fun: my instinct said that I should stand for him (he's sort of an arms-across-the-chest kind of guy) but with my damn hip hurting, I ended up sitting . . . big mistake. I struggled for the first act, until I could get the engineer to reset my mic so I could stand up. It's amazing what a huge difference a little thing like sitting vs. standing makes; it's the difference between playing outfield with or without a glove, or running with shoes that don't quite fit.

Standing up and settling into him let me bring Cosmic Boy to life, and really find his point of view about himself and his relationship with the other Legionaries. Once I knew who he was, and once he lived in me, I was able to do some really cool stuff. At one point in the last act, I felt so confident that I knew him, I even asked for a second take on a line where I thought I could play a more interesting beat than I did in the first take, which everyone on the other side of the glass was very happy with. I rarely ask for additional takes because if an actor is going to ask for a second pass he'd better have something really great to do, to justify the extra time and expense, and until recently I just haven't had the level of confidence as a voice actor necessary to pull that off.

I can't say exactly what dialogue or scene was, but you Meisner actors will probably grok this: there are three beats in the line. The first time I did it, I set him straight, enlightened him, and went one better. As soon as the words were out of my mouth, I realized that enlightening him and going one better were essentially the same beat, so I asked for another take where I set him straight, enlightened him, and shared bad news, which sort of went one better but was more specific and "shaded" differently and was more interesting. I felt an emotional connection to the words and the scene after the second take, and I guess the other actors did, too. One of them said, "Oh, I really liked that," and another said, "Dude, you're not Cosmic Boy; you're Actor Boy!" To which I replied (in a Ted Knight voice), "Yes, Actor Boy . . . who, in his disguise as Waiter Boy, keeps the city safe from doooom."  And there was much rejoicing.

I wish I could show or discuss the character models I saw while I was there, but I think that's a one-way ticket to unemployment . . . but they are really, really cool. I'm back again on Friday, and if Warner Brothers doesn't give me the cockpunch for what I've written here today, maybe I can get some permission to release a few more details. Now, I think I'm going to walk around my house and talk like Ted Knight.

"Meanwhile, in Wil's office, Ferris and Riley sleep on the floor, unaware that a mysterious stranger lurks just outside the wall. Can Actor Boy arrive in time to save them from doooooom? Only Monroe and Spaulding know for sure!"

Posted by Wil at 12:11 PM | Permalink | Comments (24) | TrackBacks (1)

So a whole bunch of Nintendo nerds are paralyzed with outrage that Nintendo changed the name of the Revolution to Wii. Some of them, I've heard, are even considering having their tattoos of Link, Mario, and Kirby removed (but not Samus and Pikachu; those stay. Even pissed off nerds have their limits, you know.)[1]

Nintendo says,

"Wii sounds like 'we,' which emphasizes that the console is for everyone. Wii can easily be remembered by people around the world, no matter what language they speak. No confusion. No need to abbreviate. Just Wii.

Wikipedia adds,

Nintendo spells "Wii" with two "i"s to create an image of players gathering together to play. The spelling also is intended to invoke the controllers the Wii uses. 

I actually think that logic is extremely cool, very non-linear, and surprisingly poetic for a video game company. And guess what? Nintendo now has people who are not Nintendo fanboys talking and thinking about the Wii. Brilliant.

Why are so many Nintendo fanboys taking it so personally? I wonder why the name of a gaming console is such a big deal? Isn't it the catalogue of games and how well they play what really matters?

There wasn't this much outrage from Trekkies when Rick Berman destroyed the Enterprise D, and that was worth some serious tattoo removal.

[1] Okay, I made that up, but the point stands.

Posted by Wil at 6:08 PM | Permalink | Comments (31)