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September 02, 2001

Nimrod's Son

Nimrod's Son

Couple of cool things:

Got this Email a few days ago:

Congratulations! You are the recipient of five and a half out of four Sutherlands from

our gratuitously indignant reviewing duo at Blog You! Blog You! Blog You!,

a consumer's guide to weblogs.

To see how you stacked up, feel free to visit:

http://www.blogyou.com

In the review, both the guys were really cool. They were very complimentary, and they both lamented the lack of graphics on the site. So I was thinking about it, and I really don't plan to add a lot of graphics to the site, because I just don't like graphics. I think they slow down the site, and that's lame. I also don't plan on adding lots of "gallery" pictures, because there are other sites out there that are great fansites, and I would just be ripping them off, and stealing their traffic, which is also lame. But I wrote an email back, and I read it to Anne, and she thought it was cool, so I'm gonna print it here:

Hey,

You guys...this is so freaking cool! I LOVE that I rated on your site. Is it a typo that I got 5 and a half out of four? Or is that something you cats do to fuck with lamers like me?

About the lack of graphics: I made a conscious decision to abstain from over loading the site with graphics. I hate graphics that are only there to dress something up, and that's the only reason I'd do more graphics. I put all my energy into the really spartan design, so the content would stand out, and not get lost amongst the noise. And I (there I go, starting a sentence with a conjunction again) *was* going to put up a gallery, but why bother? There are way better sites out there, and I'd just be ripping them off. Once I get IDS configured, I'll have someplace to put my personal pictures, but that's prolly a week or two off.

Look at it this way: you've got two restaurants to choose from. One, Chez Jackass, is a snooty place, where the food is okay, but they REALLY dress up the plate, all nice and pretty...lots of herbs that you won't eat, and lots of silverware that you won't use. Oh, and they overcharge you, make you wait three hours to be seated, water down the drinks, and fuck up your order. Twice. But boy, didn't that plate look nice?

Then there's Joes. Joes is a restaurant on the skankiest street downtown. It has one neon sign, and the "E" is on the fritz. There's a jukebox, but it only plays 45s, and "Wooly Bully" skips. But Joe cooks really good food, and he cooks it himself. He'd never dream of hiring another cook, because any other cook wouldn't make it his way. You never leave there feeling hungry, and you can still get a shot of Jack for 2.50. Because that's the way Joe remembers it, and that's the way it's going to be in his joint, dig?

Well, when it comes to websites, I eat at Joes.

Thanks again for the review. It was really, really cool.

Wil

I hear that Alan Thicke has a weblog, too. So I went to check it out, and it becomes obvious after about three paragraphs that it is so not real. But I don't really care, because it's extremely funny. Check out "About me"...not only does the guy seem cool, based on his tastes and all, but I really like the design of this site.

I don't know Alan Thicke, at all, beyond playing on a celebrity hockey team with him a couple of times.

I remember that Alan Thicke was pretty cool, and I seem to recall him having a good sense of humor... I hope that he doesn't pull a complete dickhead move and force this guy to shut down the site, because that would suck.

Alex Trebek? Funny you should ask about him. He was on the team too, and he was a major league asshole.

Big time.

Which reminds me of something: My roommate in college was Chris Hardwick, of eMpTyVee's Singled Out and Trashed fame, as well as the show Guys Like Us. Chris is also in Jane White is Sick and Twisted, which is why I am in Jane White is Sick and Twisted. Chris is a very, very funny comedian, and has better press people than I do, apparently, because not only has he gotten to be on Politically Incorrect, he's also been on Celebrity Jeopardy!

If you're like me, you'd really like to run up to Alex Trebek, and slap him on his know-it-all bitch face, right? (well, there goes any chance I have of making Celebrity Jeopardy. Dammit.) So Chris is on the show, and Trebek asks him to introduce himself, and Chris does, and says that he is the host of Singled Out, and suggests that Trebek and he trade guests and audiences...the joke being that the Jeopardy guests and audience and the Singled Out guests and audience are totally different. Trebek doesn't get it. At all. So there is this tiny uncomfortable pause, and Chris says, "You've never seen my show, have you?" And Trebek just says, "No." Then, without pause, "Let's meet our next contestant..."

Later in the show, Chris is asked a question, and he gets it wrong, and Trebek looks at his little cards, and gives one of those condescending, Canadian accented, "No, I'm sorry, the correct answer is, of course, 'Henry Arthur Payne'...Henry...Arthur...Payne."

Chris looks at him, doesn't miss a beat, and says, "Hey, you know, on my show, I have all the answers, too, dude!"

Trebek has no comeback.

I'll take "Anal Bum Cover" for 200, Trebek.

Posted by wil at September 2, 2001 01:49 PM