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September 23, 2002
I had an audition for "John Doe" this morning.
I watched it over the weekend, and thought it was pretty good. There were some things that I thought were very "pilot heavy," but other than that, I think the show has great potential...sort of a Bourne Identity meets Millennium, meets Girls Gone Wild.
A brief explaination of "pilot heavy" is in order: When a series creator wants to sell his or her idea to a network, after all the scripts are approved, and the casting is done, the creator shoots what is called a "pilot." In the pilot, the creator has to show the network more or less what they're going to do over the years of the series, and introduce them to the main cast, as well as to the viewing audience. Because of these necessities, pilots can be a little heavy on the talking and exposition, and the explosions and stuff.
So I thought it was a little "pilot heavy," but not bad at all. I don't think anyone should ever judge a series by it's pilot.
So I'm a little excited about this audition, because I like the show, and I haven't had an audition in several weeks.
Funny aside: at an audition I had a few weeks ago, I walked in, and the receptionist comes over to me and says, "You're Wil Wheaton, right?" I told her that I was, and she replied to me, excitedly, "I LOVE YOUR WEBSITE!"
Okay, I thought that was really cool. =]
Anyway, there's this massive brushfire burning near my house, and the resulting cloud of smoke is thousands of milles thick, and hovering over my house, so when I walked out to my car, it was covered in ash, and the sun was casting this spooky blood red haze down on everything. My lawn is completely dead, so it was sort of orange...wish I'd taken a picture of it, but I didn't.
So I head over to the audition, which is to play a character called "Elvis", who is described thusly:
"a wild-eyed genius with an IQ that's over 160...a former "Doogie Howser" with a brilliant mind and questionable social skills. The youthful chief of neurosurgery at a Seattle hospital..."
Sound familiar? He's sort of halfway between Wesley and the guy I played on Invisible Man, so it's not a lot of work to prepare the audition...I even get some technobabble...albeit medical terminology, which is a little bit easier to remember.
I get to the audition early, and as I'm walking up the stairs, I am passed by this AMAZINGLY BEAUTIFUL GIRL, who is clearly reading for the part of the AMAZINGLY BEAUTIFUL GIRL...I shit you not, she is even wearing a red dress.
As she passes me, I am engulfed in the intoxicating sent of her perfume, and I am hit full in the face with a hypernostalgic memory from when I was about 15...
I'm with my best friend Darin. We've just seen a movie in Burbank, and we're driving back to his house. We could take the freeway, and be there in about 15 minutes, but we choose to take a more circuitous surface street route, knowing that it will allow us to stay out longer.
We're listening to "The Queen is Dead" as we pull through the curves of this particular street, talking about girls, comics, Nintendo, and debating the me. We stop at a light, and a two girls pull up next to us. I look over, notice that they're insanely hot, and begin to get nervous. At 15, I'm convinced that any girl I see is a potential trip to at second base...though I've never even been to first base, or really had a real at bat, yet.
Darin looks over, and says, "Hey! That's Misty!"
"That's Misty! I know her from school."
Darin waves to her, and we all get out of our cars, leaving them idling in the middle of the street, in the middle of the night. Over the next few months, and even now, that simple act of standing in the middle of the steet would bring me incredible satisfaction.
Darin introduces me to her, and she is very, very nice to me. I am immediately drawn to her. She is about my height, with lots of thick blonde hair and bright green eyes that stand out from her face in the La Crescenta night. She is funny, and engaging, and our conversation is easy and effortless. She is also wearing this amazing perfume, that gives me goosebumps...I realize with some embarassment that I have been inhaling deeply through my nose, while she talks, drinking her in.
We talk for a long time, Darin and I carefully avoiding topics like the ones we've been discussing in the car. Though we are nerds, we know that Cthulhu is just not discussed in the presence of potential foolin' around.
A few cars pull up behind us, and we wave them around, as we stand there in the middle of the street, in the middle of the night, enjoying the freedom of being away from our parent's ever-watchful eyes, talking to a beautiful girl while Morrissey entreats an anonymous driver to "take me out, tonight...take me anywhere I don't care I don't care..."
Eventually, that time comes when we have to get home, and she has to leave as well. We begin the awkward process of saying goodbye, and I try to screw up the courage to ask Misty for her phone number. We stand there a little too long, me fumbling with my words, and she asks, "Would you like to go out sometime?"
I unsuccesfully try to act nonchalant and my voice breaks as I reply, "Sure!"
She writes her number down on a 3x5 card...which I provide to her from within my Car Wars Deluxe Edition box set. She writes her name and number on the card, and before she delivers it into my sweaty hand, she takes a bottle of perfume from within her purse, and sprays the card.
"So you won't forget me," she said.
Yeah, like there is any chance of that happening.
I put the card back into my Car Wars Box, and we all get back into our cars, still idling in the middle of the street, in the middle of the night.
Darin and I drive back to his house in an electrified, excited, stunned silence.
I have gotten a phone number from a beautiful blonde, without even asking.
Though I kept that card in that box for years... I never got the courage to call her. I don't know why, really...I know I was super geeky and afraid that she'd want to make out, or something, and I wouldn't know what to do (I should be so lucky)...maybe I was content to sit in the safety of my garage, listening to Oingo Boingo, happily considering what could be...maybe I was just a lameass who didn't know what to do when the golden prize landed in his lap.
Yeah, I'm pretty sure it's the last one.
After my audition today, as I was driving home into this great ominous cloud of thick grey smoke, I thought about that night, and the months that surrounded it. I thought about the way her perfume still permeates my Car Wars Deluxe Edition Box Set, and the times I'd play Car Wars in my dressing room with my friend Caius, when I was working on TNG.
I remembered how cool I thought it was to be on Trek back then, and how much fun it was to be part of something that I knew was great. It was wonderful to be part of something that made me feel proud. I feel that same way about WWDN. I feel proud of this stupid website, and the chance it's given me to find my Voice...I feel proud that even though the source is clunky and I really need to redo everything now that I know what I'm doing, this lame website is mine, for better or for worse.
As I drove home, I looked to my right, at the bright blue September sky over Downtown, and off to my left at the growing cloud of smoke swrling around the mountains, and wondered whatever happened to Misty, who signed her name with a heart over the i. I wondered if she remembers standing in the middle of that road, in the middle of the night, fifteen years ago. I wondered what that amazingly beautiful girl in the red dress would say if she knew that the smell of her perfume had put me in a time machine.
The fire burned hotter, out of control.
Posted by wil at September 23, 2002 04:55 PM
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» Memories. from aardvark.dj
Wil Wheaton has an excellent little piece of writing today. The smell of a perfume on a complete stranger brought back recollections of early romantic fumblings. It got me thinking; what happened to my memories of times like that? I... [Read More]
Tracked on October 24, 2004 02:28 AM
Man. Unrequited Love. At last, Unca Willy and I have something in common!
I sympathize with you, man. There's been times like that in my life when I SHOULDA CALLED DAMNIT but never worked up the courage.
Here's to ya, Monkey Wrangler. :)
Nice story Wil... I think we all have memories of nights just like that one (well maybe not JUST like that one, but you know what I mean)
I hope the ash from those fires doesn't wreck your paint job either
Dude, I have to say, you have a great writing style.
yep... her name was wynne....
hope all went well with the audition.
For all the rest of you guys out there, when the girl gives you her number, CALL HER.
I'll forgive you Wil because you ended up with a cool chick anyway. ;)
Isn't it Paul Harvey that says,
"And that's the rest of the story"
Thanks for the story Wil.
I love that song...
...and if a double decker bus kills the both of us, to die by your side... well the pleasure and the privlidge is mine...
That was an awesome memory, Wil. :)
Sometimes the past's phantoms haunt all of us. Sometimes its a song, a smell a similar face. Your writing never fails to bore me.
And like the other guy said before, a girl gives you her number call her.
Best wishes on the audition. Nice story. It's funny how a scent will take you right back to the past. If I smell lavender, I'm right back to childhood with my grandmother. That must be why I planted some in my front yard so I can pass by it on my way to work.
The other night when you wrote your log with the Dead Milkman quote--although not a remarkable journal, it brought me back to a time and space I'd forgotten about--It changed my feelings that day. Today you've done it again, I appreaciate your sincerity and truth in your log. You are quite a talented writer and should have great success at it. It makes me proud to log on to your site. Instead of reading mindless pop culture banter, I've read some literature today.
god, boys like you pissed me off. I have had several guys now tell me they had such a crush on me once upon a time and all i can remember is sitting at home wishing the phone would ring. Ya know the sick in the pit of your stomache, heart pounding feeling when the phone would ring, then the crush when it was for your mom kinda nights. I still have those as a matter of fact. I bet she does remember that night and thinks she did something stupid or looked bad and thats why you didnt call her.
Dagnabit! Do you have any idea how much I miss my ex-girlfriend now? I mean, argh, Wil! Argh, indeed!
It's all just moments in time.
They can define who we are or make us say, if only.
You're still "the kid who almost set your aunt on fire"
This is a nice place, Wheaton, thank you.
I know what is on all of our minds; How did Misty feel about you? and Do you think she will ever know how you felt? I believe that Misty might have felt the same nervousness that you felt because she knew you weren't just some lameass geek boy that thought she was hot. You had(have) depth and you will always have that...
By the way, does that whole story remind anyone of the Matrix; Lady in the Red Dress...
Until your next story...
I was friends with my husband for several years before we eventually got together, and a while ago I made a list of all the girls (that I know of) that had crushes on him at one time or another, but never went out with him. I got to number 24 (me) and then showed him the list. His jaw hit the floor -- he knew about maybe three of them.
Men just have no clue.
I think we all have memories and triggers that bring them up. I lost my grandmother last sunday and for the life of my I can't bring myself to go near her house because it smells like her.
Good luck with John Doe. It was one of the new shows that I have watched thus far and liked. The rest seem to be just more of the same old same old.
Turtle - men have no clue because you women never just tell us what you want! Always has to be a little game of "figure it out". ;-)
Damned women! =)
Yeah, we women are SO confusing... Why can't we just SAY what we want? Like maybe in writing. In block letters. On some sort of big billboard.
there's something about your writing that brings out the time machine for all of us, i think....
just reading your story made me remember a few episodes like that of my own.
...there's something magical about those half-forgotten summer evenings, cruising with a friend, talking about music, roleplaying games (whaa..you thought you were the only geek here?) movies, and most of all...GIRLS..
the ones you were in love with,
the ones you wish you had the nerve to talk to...
the ones your were pretty sure might actually like you, and you were dying to find out....
at the time, you couldn't wait to get older..
you can only begin to realize how great it was back then...
then again, i'm married to the girl of my dreams, and have a dream job as an art-director, and just bought a house...
so growing up has it's moments too..
thanks for the great story wil
Go take a cold shower, O wild-eyed youthful one.
You know speaking as a woman I have to tell you after reading your story along with some of the comments I think (dare I say it) I finally have some minute understanding of how your gender ticks. Could this possibly be one of the answers to the question" why didn't he call ? He seemed like such a nice guy" and then the after thought of "I guess he wasnt interested after all"
Well here's a tip, speaking as the other gender, sometimes we are just as taken with you but have NO CLUE how to tell you without looking foolish.
And Wil, I wish all nice guys could speak so eloquently through his words. I think every girl wishes she were Misty to someone at least once in her life.
I love your writing style Wil...and of course, your story brought on the time machine for me. *grin*
Keep it up, you have an awesome site!
In all seriousness, I think a lot of guys (myself very much included) are a little scared and need to have some assurance that the feelings are mutual before they make any kind of move. Many times we wait too long and end up in the dreaded "friend zone".
It's no fault but our own, I realize. It's just a bit of an explanation as to why some of us seem to be so dense about women being interested in us.
Is it just me, or do I hear Chris de Burgh singing in the background... ?
Ahhhh... young mis-guided love...
Geez, I am gettin' too old for this stuff!
Wil, you should write stories like this more often. They are the jems of this website.
Katie Parkin, summer camp, 8th grade. She allowed me to stare at her legs, put my hands on her waist, the small of her back, fingertips just under the hem of her shirt. I buried my face in her neck, letting her short curls whisper against my cheek and her sweat dampen my shoulder.
She wanted to be close after camp let out, enough so that she ran over and stuck her head in the window of my Mom's Oldsmobile and pressed her phone number into my hand. I never called, and this was after we had danced and sweated and were cautioned by the chaperones, after we went out into the night, away from the humidity generated by the rushing avalanche of hormones generated by teenagers at church camp and innuendo-laden 80's pop. I like to remember that there was a kiss. I could be wrong. It could be that the intimacy merely suggested it. I delude myself sometimes.
i know how roughy would have ended that story...but i'll leave that for him to say.
Well, everyone else has pretty much covered everything I could think of saying about the relative clulessness of boys, so I'll have to fall back on introducing more people to this page:
which carefully explains all the correlations between the song you were listening to on that fateful night, and the death of Princess Di. I know it's totally random, but hey, I'm TangentGirl.
I feel for ya, Wil. I was a dork/geek in school, and now I'm all cool, grown up, and can handle myself in social situations. At least that's how I pretend to be.
If only I knew then what I know now.
I'm subbing in schools, so I sat in on a couple of high school classes last week. After more than 15 years out of high school, I now see that they're still kids. On the threshold of being all grown up, but still good kids. I'm glad that I didn't know then what I know now. Growing up is part of the experience.
I still miss my ex-girlfriends, but I'm married now and there's no way *I'm* gonna complain about how things have turned out.
One more thing I just remembered.
This girl I went out with on a couple of innocent dates tried to kiss me, and I DIDN'T EVEN NOTICE! I was in college, and apparently still a clueless dork. Dang, she was a babe, too. Dork dork dork dork.
I find the mention of Cthulu and Morrissey in the same piece of writing to be one of the most endearing things I've read in quite awhile. It instantly reminds me of similar situations in my past. Although my token is a many sided d&d dice.
I'm your standard geek (I'm a cover artist dealing in fantasy and sci-fi) so I must admit when I originally visited your website it was because you were a part of Star Trek. But after spending quite a bit of time reading your writings I think you are far more interesting and enjoyable than any script you've delivered as an actor. This is not to knock your acting one bit (although I would be one of those people saying --the curse? what were you thinking! ;) but to say your writing is excellent. This is why I find myself watching that silly game channel now. It's bad enough my better half has gotten me into watching Screen Savors at night.
Nifty story man, you should seriously consider doing more. You evoke images seemingly without effort and you have a knack for bringing the reader into your memory through the use of the senses. We can smell see and hear it, and we can definitely feel it. Good job!
*reminiscent sigh* .......Amanda......
I'm sure your audition was good. The rest is up to whoever is casting this show. I am sure that you know this.
As for meeting good looking girls, at that age, they are fiiiiiiiine!!!!!!!!!!!!! Some stay like that at any age. It is great to see that you have the memory to take yourself back and write about something that took place that long ago. Does anyone have the courage to call these breath-taken, beach owning, highway stopping, mind freezing constant sunshines of nature. Even if you do not call, you have called them 1000 times on the first night you meet them. I think some of them know it too.
Where does the time go?
Oh Man Wil!! I cry every time I read one of these stories of yours, these reminiscing type stories that touch my heart & soul!! FOR THE LOVE OF MIKE!! WRITE A BOOK!! PLEASE!! You have such a gifted talent for story telling!!
'Break a leg' on the John Doe opportunity! I watched that show the other night & enjoyed it, hope you get the gig!
Great story. I've read entire novels that didn't put me in the moment as much as that story. Engaging site. Reason enough to be proud.
Wil, Thanks for the sharing the memory and the awkward moment. In my case, I actually asked the girl out, dated a few times, only to have her tell me I was coming on too strong. If you knew how geeky I was then (OK, still am), there's no way I came on too strong...go figure.
Fortunately, when I met the totally incredible woman I married, she eliminated the ambiguity by presenting me with a lunch basket filled with all the necessities and invited me on a picnic. We never did go on the picnic...just fell in love and got maried. Best, Rob
That was such a sweet story, Wil. *sigh*
And yeah, I know whatcha mean about that fire. The Sun was casting such an ominous hue of orange over here. That smoke messed with my nose & throat today!
Anyway, I hope your audition has good results. :]
P.S. Will keep good thoughts for you about the audition.
Wow, having the actual phone number on a perfumed card and never calling her is so completely geek-validating. Wouldn't it be cool if it turned out Misty was a total Wesley freak, and pined away for you for years and years, and you never knew it. Actually that would kind of suck. Never mind. I sure hope she reads your site and drops you a line though, or sends you a perfumed card in the mail.
I also hope you learned a lesson about there being cues in life that you just plain take, no questions. In the words of Eddie Murphy, say you walk into a house and a deep voice comes out of the walls and says, "GET OUT!" You would GET, the FUCK, OUT.
Wheaton you were a schmuck. What did it take to get a date out of you - hitting you in the head with a 2x4? ;)
Let this be a lesson to you all - a beautiful girl gives you her number on a perfumed card - follow her up!
Then again, after things have developed and down the track she might say "Eddiiieee! I want half Edddiieeeeee!"
What is it about music and scents that make them so nostagia provoking? Every once in a blue moon I catch a whiff of one of those particular perfumes that reminds me not of a particular girl, but of the heart-melting spark of being near such sublime sweetness. And music is the same way. Just the mention of a band or a song, if it is one of those that made an impression back in that time, will take me right there in an instant. Like fer instance, Wil's mention of Oingo Boingo reminded me of those mix tapes, just before I started buying CD's, and the excitement of freedom in an 18' long, gold-colored '67 Dodge Charger with a little brass plaque we put on the dash that read "U.S.S. Nemisis, two tons of fun." because we thought it was cool. Yes, I know we misspelled it, but we didn't at the time, and that makes it sort of quaint. Everything seemed more dramatic back then. Every conversation seemed like it could be life-changing. Now, for contrast, my wife and I are waiting to find out if she if pregnant for the third time in three years, and if she is, the unexpected development would disrupt everything quite thoroghly. I'm praying hard that she isn't, but I sleep okay. Thats life, which is what happens while you are making other plans.Sorry if I've rambled on, Wil. I don't have a weblog, so I'm borrowing yours;-)
I always thought you should get on the ER
and I noticed that "time travel" is going to be a
new part of "Enterprise"...
who knows Wil, maybe Misty is still out there..
getting on your web site...
and just what fire are you talking about with your end line...
"the fire burned hotter, out of control."
nudge nudge, wink wink, say no more, say no more
The fire burns just down the street from the theater I'm working in at the moment... It's freaking me out. Stay safe.
Oh, and I'm sending you the best mojo vibes I can for John Doe!!
That was amazing!
As obvious as it should already be to us, if there is one life lesson I'll take from wilwheaton.net (And I will) it's that celebrities are human. Man, did that story ever bring me back. You always assume that celebs are these invincible amazing people who do EVERYTHING you've always wanted to do. I guess it takes stories like this to realize that celebs still have feelings and aren't made of stone.
I think you've taken us all in that time machine with you, though we're all getting off at different stops.
I was going to post something clever and witty. But this will do just as well:
:) :) :)
Dude. When you publish your book (and you will), I will buy it. I will buy one for myself. I will buy one for each of my parents. I will buy one for my sister. I will buy one for each my friends. And then I'll buy one to have on hand for those times when you need a gift for someone on short notice. And when I give that one away, I'll buy another for the next time.
in a way...the love that never was...led to the love that is...so it was good...and can never be spoiled by the harsh colors of reality.
Call the number!!! :-D
I know its years later, and *obviously* its not to ask her out on a date.
But wouldn't it be cool to see if you can find her, and find out what she thought when you didn't call her?
"Though we are nerds, we know that Cthulu is just not discussed in the presence of potential foolin' around."
That is some really funny shit.
Cyclopean seaweed covered blocks of incredible age rumble like thunder beneath the Pacific. Ocean currents churn restlessly like partially digested beef in the gullet of a vegetarian. Somewhere a herring gull screams out the sorrows of a million tortured souls sailing the endless currents of air while fires engulf the land. The great 'Squid Dragon', forever dreaming in his watery prison reads WWDN from his underwater terminal. My name is CTHULHU, not Cthulu, and I also like Oingo Boingo.
Don’t shoot me. I am only the messenger.
Well that was TOO sweet..
Wheaton have you not figured it out YET that the
geeky guy always REALLY win's "the beautiful girl's" heart..IN REAL LIFE..
HONEST!!!!(I bet THAT GIRL is a monkeyboxer NOW!)
Wow. SO many memories flooding back, so many missed opportunities that I realise now I should have followed up on that will never come my way again. I remember one time I actually followed up and called the girl, but it didn't happen.
She was on a train and she was a brown haired Heavy Metal goddess. Black leather jacket, black spandex pants, and tough as nails. She was ripping into this guy for drooling over her (he was actually drooling) and after he sped away my friends and I were getting up to get off the train and she handed a card with her name and number on it to my friend who was closest to her, pointed to me and said "Give this to him." Well, my friend gave it to me and it took several days before I worked up the guts to call. I called and a woman (probably her mother) answered. I asked for the girl and her reply in a very grim, sad voice was "I'm sorry, but she doesn't live here anymore."
I was totally bummed, and feeling like a jerk for upsetting this poor woman. Her daughter had run away and here was some guy calling looking for her. Part of me was kicking myself for waiting so long to call, yet another part of me was relieved that I didn't bring any more dysfunction into my life because she was obviously troubled. I never really got an opportunity like that again, and while I don't regret that one so much for obvious reasons I regret the others where looking back on the memories I see the signs I missed or was too afraid to acknowledge.
Good luck with John Doe.
1987, another hot summer night, cruising through Burbank with my friend, winking at the balding losers who were trying to impress younger women with their fast cars and beer bellies. We pull up to a stoplight, and in the car next to us is this geek from school, Darin, and his friend, who just happens to be Wil Wheaton. OH MY GOD! I've seen Stand by Me at least 10 times in the past year - my friends think I'm obsessed, but that movie was so good! My favorite scene is where Chris is keeping watch and Gordie is having a nightmare and they sit up and talk... GOD, I cry every time. I think that River Phoenix and Wil Wheaton are two of the best actors I've ever seen!
So anyway, there in the next car is Gordie La-frickin-Chance! Of course we stop, to get out and talk.
My friend knows I'm obsessed with Gordie, I mean wil, so she concentrates on distracting Darin so I can have him all to myself. OMIGOD, I can't believe we're standing here in the middle of the street talking to Wil Wheaton. He's so shy too, I can tell because he keeps breathing through his nose in a way that makes me slightly nervous. He's so cute, I can tell he wants my phone number but maybe he's never asked a girl for a date before? I gave him my number and hoped he'd call. For the next few weeks, all I could think was that he'd call me. I'd get home from school and ask if there were any messages. Every time the phone rang I ran for it. But he never called. I started watching Star Trek, TNG. Wil was still cute, but Wesley sure was a snotty little brat. Yeah, that's probably the real him.
OK, that was really me. But seriously, Wil, how often did you take out that perfumed card and put it over your face, then lay back and relax with your reflections? And do you use your left hand or your right hand for that?
Very cool. I'm impressed by your writing skills. So when are you going to write an novel?
I was in 8th grade, he was a freashman....I found out what cologne he wore and the next time I was in a department store I poured a little on a piece of paper, & tucked that into my diary....that diary still smells like him....it was Christmas time when I did that and that cologne still makes me think of Christmas.....that was 17 years ago......wow.....thanks, Wheaton......I needed that....
Shoulda Woulda Coulda Didn't...*sigh*...
in the words of the preist on "Princess Bride"
I remember a time where love was pure. I remember a time where time was pure. I remember a time where life was simple. A time where time was love and love was simple...confusing? Thats the long and short of remembering a crush...isn't it good!?
Hey dude... you are a writer Wil, through and through. If you don't publish things in this life, they will mearly take your archives and will become the source of legend with stuffy english professors discussing your work while smoking there pipes and drinking brandy... in short Wil, "you're the man!" Keep up this site. It is like hanging out with a good friend and hearing about his day over a couple beers.
I always say everything happens for a purpose, and I am sure it is true with this as well.
Had you called that number your life may have taken a totally different turn and you would not be where you are today.
For every action there is an equal and opposite reaction...who is to say what chain of events that would have set into motion.
Memories are a wonderful thing though.
Who knows maybe that was Misty that passed you in the hallway.
This is the first time I read anything by you, the story about Misty, and it was great! You really can write. Now let's get practical. You're famous. You're probably rich. You are probably considered good looking by women. I'm leading up to...go after Misty! It's not too late. Celebrities can find anyone they want and date just about anyone they want. So get going; surely you have the courage now. Good luck, and write about it.
Great story. Reminds me of a gal that had a crush on me in college. I was oblivious to it until we were doing a scene for acting class where we had to kiss. She tried to give me a tonsilectomy! Unfortunately, by that time she had moved on and was dating a friend of mine. *sigh*
Unfortunately, I missed the John Doe pilot. I was at a rehearsal. I heard it was good.
From one actor to another, Break A Leg!
If you get the part, I'll definitely watch it.
Wil you are a shining star in these days of darkness. If only there were more of your ilk, the world would be a sunnier place.
Please come by and cheer up the sods at www.superevil.tv Lord knows they need it.
They have a nice new message board, where world politics and womans rights are discussed.
Great story Wil!
Join the http://superevil.tv forums and win a free wifebeater tee shirt of your choice.
I've found that usually its better to let the woman bring up Cthulhu. If she does, then you know things have serious potential. ;)
You never called her...you ass...how dare you post that story...all it did was dredge up memories of may past when I failed to take chances. Only now at 35 have I learned its far better to get turned down and humiliated and suffer for days on end, than to never attempt and have the "what if" burn inside your gut for all eternity. Damn you for making me remember when I was a coward.
Good luck, good luck, good luck on the "John Doe" audition. It won't diminish your value as a person or make any of us adore you less if you DON'T get the part, but if they give it to anyone else I'm gonna have to... erm... not watch the show! Yeah, that's right! (I wonder if it's even going to air here? *ponder*) Anyway, my fingers are crossed!
Am I the only one who read through all the comments, secretly hoping that Misty would be one of the responders? That she's been reading Wil's site and found a chance to respond? Not that anything would happen, but just the synchronisity of it all would be so cool...and completely unrealistic. Still, if only the rest of us had such a chance as that.
For those of you that missed the 1st episode..
"John Doe" rocked!! As it was the follower of
"Firefly"..how could it loose?
Cmon Wil...audition Mojo..(perhaps you could turn it into a regular role?)
Uncle Willy was on the Invisible Man and I missed it!!! Oh why, why did I cancel my cable subscription?
By the way, I love your writing, Wil. I, like many others who have posted, think you should explore that more as a vocation/avocation.
Wow. What a nice story. Wil, you really do have a lovely writing style, its easy to read, personal and comforting. This one feels more like a memory of mine than somthing I am reading about someone else's life. Very very well done. :)
I haven't played a good game of Car Wars since I moved to Los Angeles.
I wonder what Wil Wheaton would say if he knew that the mention of Car Wars had put me in a time machine?
I suppose the reasons why John Doe was one of the worst shows I saw this season might be due to this being the pilot episode, however, some of them aren't.
yeah, there was way too much talking by the main character, whether on screen or in narration. In fact, at one point he's talking to a dead man in the morgue and I comment that he's just talked someone to death. The whole over-talking thing isn't helped by the fact that the main character is extremely boring and uninteresting.
His powers are extremely inconsistent and are basically labelled as a plot-device. They only word when they won't help him. As long as the information is useless, he knows it, if it's usefull, he needs to research it (this doesn't apply to driving/piloting though). Wow. Some powers. And then he tells the EXACT time (minutes and seconds) by looking at the sun without knowing the year, the day, or even an exact location. Yeah, that's impossible.
The intro shows us this guy who doesn't know all these things, and all he wants to do is buy a big di... I mean car, some fancy clothes and win money. Can this guy be any more ridiculous?
Finally we come to the incompetent supporting characters. This includes the cop who instead of walking to the suspect who hasn't seen him, calls out so that the suspect can run away instead.
Ugh. The worst show of the season, I am not surprised they wouldn't allow reviewers a preview of the show.
You are so bloody geeky, Wil, you're cool.
Reading this entry, it took me back to every chance meeting I had as a gawky too tall teenager with a geek streak a mile long.
Thanks for the portal back in time.
Some days I read your log entry's and think "if he get's any deeper he's gonna drown!"
You do all of us 30 something geek boys proud!
jeez, now i know why you shits never call!
Hey CNN mentioned you on a short peice they did on blogging
Don't tell anyone, but I was pretty damn psyched when my wife picked out a perfume recently that took me back -- to a girlfriend, or maybe a couple girlfriends had the same stuff, or maybe the same scent was in the laundry detergent their mothers used, I can't remember precisely.
Either way, it gets me pretty, well, "hotter," so I'm glad she has it.
I have run into some "old flames" along the way of my 35 years, and, you know, Dracolvo above just might agree with me that the "What Ifs" kinda turn into "Whatevers" as you go on.
Cool about John Doe! I think they film a lot of it up here in Vancouver. If you make it up a few of us programming geeks would love to take you out for a beer or ten!
even when the cute girl signs your yearbook with the words "you're so damn sweet" and then her phone number...it is still possible to be so geeky as to wait an entire summer to call her. And when you do it turns out she's dating someone else already, and you spend a year hitting yourself over the head with that yearbook.
I'm feeling nostalgic for the days when you had time to do these kinds of entries every day. :)
Off to listen to The Smiths now...
Lame? Stupid? Careful Wheaton or I could become very insulted at those remarks :)
Don't feel too down hearted Wil that you passed up the chance to get with a girl called Misty, I mean really, come on. It made for a cool story though.
Congrats on the audition too man!
Good memory recall story, those bitter-sweet ones are nice to recall. Usually they leave me with a 'hmmm, wonder what happened to ???'
Hope the audition went well, hope ya get picked up for the series. As an added bonus, you'll get to visit Vancouver again(they're filming John Doe EVERYWHERE around here right now).
Wow, Wil, what a great story! Thanks for sharing it. They say that smell is the best sense for memory recollection, and clearly that's true in your case. Do you also find that once you start thinking about one long-forgotten memory, others start cropping up? Happens to me all the time.
Hope the audition went well and brings you work.
Nice story, but that wasn't nice from you that you did not call her up:(!
we accept you,
we accept you,
one of us.
Car Wars, Cthulhu, GURPS, Dead Milkmen, Linux, nethack, Star Trek, girl-shyness, Simpsons, slashdot, the EFF, converse all-stars... The list goes on and on.
We are fans of yours because we realize you are one of us.
I feel that way when stand against the wall at partys and just drink beer and watch the girls dance.
This is the greatest flashback I have EVER read...
the official trek site just put up the advertisement for the creation convention, and it mentions that you and Gates will have appearances close together. They are billing it as a 'mother and son reunion' deal. Corny, but kinda cool
Wow! You didn't call that girl because you were afraid. Amazing! Do you know what courage a girl has to have to give her number out on a card? haha I'm sure that poor girl thought you just didn't like her and that was why you failed to call her. It would have never entered her mind that you were afraid. ;)
Thanks, Wil. That was beautiful, man...
Your story reminded me of a boy I had a crush on 10 yrs ago. Yes, this happens to girls too. Last I heard he's married but I still would love to tell him how he made me feel in high school. Thanks for the memories & Andy, whatever happened to you!!??
The appropriate nice things have already been said. This is just a grammar queen kvetch.
You wrote it's instead of its.
Possibly that's all part of the act, the illusion of spontaneous ramblings when it's all carefully scripted by the publicists, but i'm.. well anyway.
it's the sort of thing a spell checker misses.
i don't know if you ever revise these or leave them just as is, the way the dead links in the older entries are kept the way they are
because this is a blog, a recording of what is,
rather than a dissertation.
what can i say? that was beautiful sad and thank you for sharing that memory with us all!
OK, Wil, great post as usual, but that last line, I'm sorry -- WAY over the top. You're a good writer, but I don't think you gave us enough history and emotion beforehand to really DESERVE such a cheesy, line.
Come on, admit it, it feels forced. :-)
Or maybe I was just not into your earlier paragraphs at all, still shaking my head over how much of a lame ass you -- and indeed all of us -- were when we were 15.
Hey, this is your first personal post, Wil, since August 31st when you wrote the entry entitled Schizm. THAT'S more like it! This is the Wil we became interested in and why we started hanging out here in the first place. Keep it up! :)
Good luck with your audition too. Oh wait, I mean, break a leg! :)
I am a HUGE bibliophile, voracious reader is more like it, and I must say that the memory you so graciously shared with us was one of the most beautiful and well written pieces I have ever had the privilige to read. Your writing style is so fluid and emotive (hope I'm using that term correctly.) You have brightened up what had been a dismal day. Thank you, friend.
I love the story. It brought me back. I completely knew how you felt through your descriptions.
It was boys like you that never called me, and I was left home alone on the weekends at 15. Wound up marrying a geek in the long run anyway.
If you actually do read this: I think your Voice is fantastic, Wil, if you're serious about your writing, one thing that could have made this even better...Do I dare criticze the writing of our beloved Wil?...As a writer myself I appreciate criticism. It helps me to write better even for on-the-fly writing. You need to connect the last full paragraph to your final statement. What brought your attention to the fire? It's kinda just hanging there being blatantly symbolic. It doesn't have to be, your reader is smart enough to catch it. Help your reader connect the two thoughts. Show them what was going on in your head that made you connect the two and complete the thought process. DOn't get me wrong I think that the piece was full of emotion and well written.
As for grammar -- that's what editors are for ;-)
Sending good 'Wil' thoughts to the John Doe people here in Vancouver. Hope you get it so you can enjoy the lovely fall weather. It's been simply gorgeous up here.
As a guy that certainly would be too blind to take any subtle or less subtle "hints" myself, I probably shouldn't talk. but dammit that was as much a hint as getting a hot frying pan smacked over your face. Had a girl ever asked me out or given me her number without asking, I would have called! .... at least I really really hope I would have^H^H^H^H :)
All this nostalgia makes me think of my first wife, Misty.
She just never seemed to be fully in love with me, sniff, sniff...
Right at the point of climax she'd always yell "GIMMIE THAT PHOTON TORPEDO WIL!" (even though my name is Joe) and I never figur....HEY WAIT A MINUTE....
I gotta say that is some very excellent writing.
Wil, you should definitely write a book =D
Post 106. Do you ever read down this far? I admit I usually read all the posts when I read one of your entries.
You've gotten a lot of well deserved praise for this entry, but what I like is the fact that you can do all that compu-babble in one post, then turn around and give us something so heart-felt. I've said it before, it's a rare thing to be able to do the two both so well. Geeks don't ususally communicate well, they lapse into geek-jargon and babble about network firewalls or who's the better Doctor Who or the merits of the various incarnations of Batman. But to be able to talk about all that stuff, and then bring up a personal, bittersweet memory from 15 years ago and make it as real as if it happened yesterday, well, just wow, Wil (sorry I don't have your way with words). How do you remember this stuff? You are one lucky guy to have such memories and the ability to share them.
And good luck on the John Doe thing. I've seen both Wesley and your Invisible Man guest shot, so I'd really like to see you get this so I can see what you meant.
Ever watched the movie "High Fidelty"?
Try it. I dare ya.
It may make you wanna call that girl's number
and find out what you've missed out.
This post put me into a timewarp. In school I was always "one of the guys" (really cute but way too geeky and tomboyish) and never were one of my crushes requited. When I graduated and we were all out on the "graduation party circuit" I got to hear all about the crushes that certain guys had on me but they were all moving away and wasn't that just tough? Grr. I sure wish boys spoke more before they grow up. :)
As always you've done an eloquent job of recounting your memories Wil. I'll be back..
Yeah, Wil! Good luck with the "John Doe" part. I'd definately keep watching the show if there's a chance you'll be on!
Pilot Heavy, eh? I loved it. I thought what you calll "Pilot Heavy" was nothing short of amazing work on their part.
I would dance with glee if every episode was as fast paced as that one!
You know, I was kind of on the fence regarding the whole 'Wil is Cool' thing until you said you played Car Wars (and weren't ashamed to admit it). You are now offically Cool. Perhaps even SuperCool.
Wow, the way you described sniffing her perfume is the way I used to feel looking at your picture in all the teen magazines. You are awesome Wil!
Wil you just described my high school years! I hereby officially pronounce you one of my four pillars of cool (the other three being Elvis Costello, Barenaked Ladies and Guido van Rossum). Blog on!
Gee, if I had been the girl, I would have been heart broken when you didn't call.
Cool story though.
Ok, just one WHACK over the knuckles for calling your site lame - 'tis NOT and never will be, Wil, so there.
Thanks for putting a smile on my face the day after I learned that greed won out and the lovely house next door to me is to be torn down and a multi-story block built, thus destroying the wonderful amount of sunshine I get, and worse still, my privacy. That was a wonderful story, Wil. I hope Misty can remember and looks back with a smile on her face on that middle of the night meeting too.
What if...Misty started to read this blog?
What if...Misty was touched?
You know we all love your web site, Wil, but seriously, you should spend more of your time writing, really writing. You have a gift for it, and a novel (or two or three...) is probably there inside you, waiting to be typed out. Hey, at least a few dozen decent short stories, at the very least! So write on...
Good luck with John Doe,
There's worse things than being typecast as a really smart guy with a good haircut.
ps Wil, you're going to be one of those grandfathers who tells long, old stories.
(there's worse things than that, too)
I liked John Doe better when it was called Pretender....
you rock. that's all there is. I love these sorts of stories. you rock.
*sigh* The Soapbox is broken. And I know unrequited love! I know this girl who I totally love, but she is going out with this other guy and they have already make a lot of plans for the future and they aren't engaged...yet. Does kind of relationships usually work don't they? Also is it "bad" if I am rooting for them to break up so I can move in?
Hey, the images of your brushfire stirred up a memory of mine that dates back to May 1980. The Empire Strikes Back was released on the Thursday before Memorial Day weekend, the week after Mt St Helens blew up. A fine mist of volcanic ash was still falling through the air in Beaverton, Oregon, turning everything gray and making it hard to see and breathe.
Hundreds of Star Wars fans were lined up outside the huge Westgate Theater. Nobody had really appropriate ashfall clothing, having never experienced a volcanic eruption before. People seemed to be afraid the ash might be harmful, and most hd covered themselves head to foot in improvised outfits, with some sort of breathing gear and eye protection -- welding glasses, ski goggles, scuba masks, military-grade gas masks, a few complete operating-room outfits including caps and booties. Some people had wrapped their heads and faces in cloth, from which big dark lenses protruded.
It looked like a huddled mass of refugees on some dismal, gray planet, standing in line for water rations and Soylent Green. By far the coolest moviegoing experience of my life.
Wow! What a story!
You are so cool Wil, and a great storyteller. SEI welcomes you to join their ranks as a political advisor. Please consider it. (we pay well)
cute on the story. but the more obvious parallel between john doe and its scifi predecessors is the pretender.
now, have you seen the pilot for firefly? there's a show that needs to get its legs, but could be terrifically funny...
I don't know if you read these comments because there are so many, but i've been visiting your site for about a year now, and I have to say that this was your best post yet. Very well written. I actually couldn't stop...and I usually hate reading. When I see a long post, I usually don't bother. Anyways, your site rocks and John Doe is a pretty good show too...hope you get it.
WOW, that was really good wil, it's brought back lots of good times and missed opertunities, but lots of memorys
Wil might be on a new show? That would be so cool. I'm kinda getting sick of Wesley-- Yes, you heard it here first: Not only do I not record the show anymore, I don't even watch it. You can blame that on General Hospital and the character on that Lucky Spencer... Speaking of my new fav show, I'm gonna go to soapcity.com instead of the soapbox today.
Good luck for the audition and don't forget to keep us all posted! And yes, all you other guys, CALL HER!!! Ok, that's a bit rich coming frm me. I never called my first number from a gorgeous guy either. I can still remember it though...
The Forsaker(Al-Khadhulu) does not like his name to be mentioned in the same sentence as "love," "sex," or "girls." He's just picky that way.
Just a few thoughts --
a) I live in Denver, and I can appreciate the experience of ash sitting on your car. When the fires were going on out here, there was ash everywhere. Not that it really matters at this point.
b) If you still have the card from this girl, and you honestly do wonder where she has gotten to, why not call the number on the card? Perhaps her parents still live there. If not, no harm in asking. An old friend of mine found me this way by calling my parents house 12 years after we had last spoken. Of course, I happenned to be there at the time, so when I answered, and he went into his spiel about who he was, why he was calling, asking where i was, etc, I had great satisfaction in responding, "Yes, John. Its me. How are you?" To which he replied..."Uhm...fine, but I didn't expect you to be there. Can I call you back when I am actually ready to talk to you?"
Ok, so a small correction. Call that number, but only if you are prepared for anyone to answer.
Worst flashback ever.
I used to think you were a stuck up jerk... now I'm not so sure... you might be a stuck up jerk trying to get chicks by pretending to be nerdy/sensitive, you might just be really lame.
Either way you didn't call the girl, so you lose.
You are the William Shatner of Next Gen.
Maybe one day you will find your Princess Toadstool and be able to live happily ever after in 1-up land. Until then get your head out of your ass and put out the big fire near your house.
That is one of the biggest fires I have ever seen. Stay out of its way.
You never called me you @%#$!!!-- oh wait, that was *another* Misty.
Because this Misty isn't a blonde, she's a redhead.
And this didn't take place in Michigan.
lady in red, huh? whatever john doe may be, wish you luck!
even though it does not belong to this post muss gesagt werden: strange thing to see "famous people" do the same weblog shit "we" do. exept you get way more comments;-)
D*mmit, I love this website. You are such an incredibly eloquent writer. Because of it I'm a monkey and proud of it. In your honor my AOL and Yahoo! IM icons are the pic of you at the top of the page that I stole especially for that purpose. You should seriously write a book.
~pup, who is now turning her attention back to the IMF protests going on just blocks from her office. updates in the closet.
I just wanted to say that I hope you get the part and I hope the character becomes a regular on the show. You deserve it!!!
Erm...that's not really as special as you'd like to think. You had already acted in some famous parts by the time you were 15, right? Of course most bimbettes are going to be eager to give you their number. Nope, nothing "magical" sounding about it at all. Just another perk of celebrity, dude. Enjoy it, but don't act like you're a "regular" guy in any way. You're way luckier than most guys.
PS- Us regular guys have to *work* for our poon-tang ;)
i think you are so damn cute. i think at your next public appearance you should wear the denim jacket with all the buttons on it like the one that was sent out for your fan club. i'm so serious.
Holy smoke! The Smiths *and* Car Wars? The guy is human! I hated Wesley, but you're okay, Wil!
Uhhhh... Ok, I'm sorry Danielle, I should have written to you... *feeling immense guilt from when I was 13*
You all should read "How I Met my Husband" by Alice Munro.
You should have called her man! But alas I can tell you love your wife and wouldnt change a thing.
i actually just posted a similar story in my journal yesterday. i was listening to the song "temptation" by new order and was reminded of a boy i met one night at a barndance my freshman year in college.
almost ten years later and i still wonder if he was the one.
i still have the little plastic bracelet they gave us all when we arrived at the barndance. that boy playfuly touched it a few times.
Cool story, as usual, but I'm gonna rant at you now anyway.
This is the furthest thing from a stupid website, and I think that you know it, if only from the size of your posse. You've managed to inspire people, which is about as cool as it gets. And you've managed to convince a crapload of people that you're worth something when they mostly hated and/or disliked you, which is nearly as cool as it gets. Do you have any idea how many friends you have?
Not to distract from the rousing round of ATTA-BOYs from the posse (and, of course, the usual, predictable negative nabob-wannabes who show up here to trash Wil's writing and then run off again)...
but... it's about time to send out a hearty congrats to all who have donated to help make Wil's goal of $15,000 for the Avon Breast Cancer walk. As of today (Saturday, Sept. 28), it's up over $15,000! So, to all you who gave (or who are about to give) the money and all of you who are walking (including Wil and Anne) -- good work! Breasts everywhere are grateful...
Okay... talk among yourselves again...
Read it. Stared at the screen for a while. Gotta talk to him...
Dear vapid masses,
I'm totally in awe. Ever so often - more often rather than less often I'm afraid - I'm exposed to something so sad, so utterly depressing, that I can't help but wonder about the fate of humanity.
Wilwheaton.net is one of those occassions. Who the hell are you people? Do you have familes? Jobs? School? Lives? Why is this dried-up actor's existence so interesting to you? Why do you take part in this exalted pauperism that is Wil Wheaton? He gives you insight into his life, and in exchange, you buy these ridiculous trinkets that he signs, further funding this idiotic raping of the masses.
Furthermore, Wil Wheaton. You should be positively ashamed of yourself. More than once you've complained that you don't spend enough time with your family. So, let me offer you this insight: try spending less time spreading your inanity to the masses and try actually living life instead of documenting it. You play at introspective, you should understand - watching life as a journal entry destroys life as an experience.
So, Wil Wheaton, you say that "it was wonderful to be part of something that made me feel proud." Out of all the meaningless tripe you've spewed on this site, this is the one gem of truth that both your readers and you need to latch on to. The former needs to let go of the past and start being the family man that he so often pines to be. The latter need to detatch from your life and find an interesting one of their own.
Oh, and Crusher sucked. Nice rainbow suit.
Wil ... marry me? Be my love monkey? (stolen from Sliders, sorry) Seriously, I love your stories. You are my God.
for bradwick...if you hate this place so much...why are you here?...and who are you to tell "the masses" what to do?...find someplace you want to be, go there...and get a life!
This is completely off the subject and will be short 'cuz this hotel computer SUCKS!
I just saw you at the TNG convention and you ROCK! It was hoonestly tthe highlight of my weekend/weeekk/month...
It wwas wonderfful to meet you.
(Did II mention this computer ssucks?)
I hope you get the role on John Doe, for your career of course, but I also have selfish motives...
Tell the producers to have the show run for five or six years, and then have it turn out that this guy's name actually IS John Doe. Then he kind of laughs sheepishly, and gets back to his construction job.
Been a while since I commented (I think), but the Boingo and Smiths references released some of my own caged nostalgia. And I remember fires burning in Box Springs National Park behind my house in Riverside, CA, wondering if I would have a house when I got home. The sun shining through those swirling clouds of smoke always added a rather ethereal quality to the landscape.
MAN, I need to move back to southern California.
trolls taste good when you spread them on a cracker.
I just came across your website and read the story proffered on the main page. Suffice to say, it appears that many of us (myself included) have had an experience or two like the one you related. I thought it was very well written.
What struck me here, admittedly more that your particular story, was that you would just put up a website and define it as you saw fit to reflect yourself to all others willing to come here. As the ripples of your influence cascade out (from such a simple thing as this memoir), it is plainly evident that you are causing more ripples of reflection among your readers. I base this on the varied and massive response to your story. And they, in turn, may be causing more ripples to others. And in this way, from one small story on one small website, you have created an ocean of thought.
In my reflection from this "ocean", I am finding a freedom to continue exploring my life in whatever form that takes (including my newfound desire to write) by your example. Id like to graciously thank you for that!
On a final note, please allow me to say that it was almost a relief to read that someone else was discussing the merits of Car Wars and Cthulhu in the middle of the night with a good friend. Since those days, alas the women in my life have kept me quite (willingly) distracted from such pursuits. Someone had to reclaim that memory for all of us. To that I say, "Mission accomplished!" Regards!
Only a flaming faggot would get the number of a girl who was obviously interested in him and then watch his little mincey faggot balls shrink everytime he thought of picking up the phone to call her.
What are you people doing here? What is it about this sub-par actor's life that interests you so much? Live your own fucking lives and stop trying to fulfill that missing part of you through this moron.
ahahahah....how would you know that?...oh i know!...well, not everybody's like you!...it may just be an angry inch...but it's yours!
remember me? anyways im banned from your loser board...i just came here today i dont know why and am sickened by this misty post...don't you have a fucking wife? it's one thing to check out other girls..but to be so enthralled by her absolute gorgeousness so much as to write what you did is disgusting and i certainly would be heart if the person i loved behaved like this. anyone who is with you must have no standards and no self esteem.
*this site shuld come with a health warning, i think im addicted*
anyway i feel i need to say that ur book is unavailable to the UK. amazon.co.uk don't stock the book! whats with that?
on a more light hearted note may we reflect on the line:
'Fuck writing, I don't want to be a writer. It's stupid, it's a stupid waste of time.' said by Gordie in Stand by Me. However by the end of the film Gordie had become the writer he'd always been meant to be.
Now that Wil is becoming that writer we have something to celebrate.
and noone has posted since JANUARY whats going on?!!!there's something strangely satisfying and fulfilling to see ur name and text come up on the site.
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