WooHoo...first comment.

I like the Wesley Crusher description. =^)

This is a great way to take a break from writing a yucky literature review that is due in 2 hours.

What?!? No "bitch in prison" dedications?

In the Book auction's description you say you were selling 2 copies, but the auction says that 3 are available.

What if your bitch from prison wins the auction?

That is an awesome description.

Are you sure he still likes to play with Nanites?

dude, you crack me up...

I loved the selling descriptions, as always worth a good laugh and much more.

That doesn't look like Wesley. It looks like Paul Mantee in "Robinson Crusoe on Mars".

quite the clever description on the action figure. man, it has to be odd sometimes, to have an action figure. i'd have one. she'd rock socks. i dunno what'd she'd do and stuff, but i think people would buy it.

woohoo! i'm going to try for the autographed wesley crusher for my moms star trek 'wall of fame' (im not kidding... my mom really does have a s.t. wall of fame)

Thanks for the afternoon chuckle, Wil! I like your "little cardboard thingy in the "hang me up in the store hole" is still there" bit.

Good luck on the auctions! (Yes, I will do my duty and place my bids. Gotta support a fellow lefty.)

I almost want to get the picture just so that I can get "Look at that large interesting thing over there!" written on it...

But that would cost money.

nice hmic. but seriously, how is the severity of my ass fire unreasonable?

nobody else bid on the pictures! i want one!

just kidding. had to bid at least. :)

They make Wesley Crusher action figures? I love it! How ingenious! Did anyone actually buy any though? Just kidding! I'd buy one, but your ebay price is up to $40, man. Too rich for my very destitute blood.

It must be too cool to see yourself as an action figure. I'd so love an autographed copy of your book. It's a damn shame I'm too poor to bid on it. Argh!!!

i think it would kick ass to have an action figure as well, even if it didn't look like me. i think mine would have to come prepackaged with a bonus posable figurine of my sidekicking dog. and much like those dolls that pee on themselves, his would have special feature: a cold, wet nose. who wouldn't go for that?

Action Figures! I'd be torn with wanted to open it or having it bronzed.

Wil, you're worth a buttload of money in action figure form!

http://cgi.aol.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=2208389209&category=37882

What it must be like to have your own action figure! It doesn't look like you though!

"What's unreasonable? Something like..."Help me, my ass is on fire!""

LMAO! By mentioning it you just encourage it, Wil :-P

You kill me Wil. You just absolutely kill me. LMFAO!!!

I think I see what i want for Christmas...

HELLO CLEVELAND!!!!

heheh, love the back of that shirt :)

You know I'd be highly insulted if I were you. That action figure is ugly! But ooh la la! Don't you look good in your fake uniform! MMMM....teenage boys. Is that wrong?

Dude, sorry to say this, but your decription should say something about him working out at the gym more than the actor who played him: the way he holds his arms (and his chest size) makes him look like he just came back from a session at Gold's Gym.

Let's see. What was it Stan Freeberg said?? Ah yes... "Ars Gratia Pecuniae"

hooooooo good times.

i wish i had money. i'd buy the book too. ^_^

hey wil, this is rach, an avid reader, and regular poster...i know you probably don't wanna here this, and are really sick of hearing it, you really do rock. i watched stand by me today, and also, Toy Soldiers. i thought i would let you know that my older sister and i used to watch that film so often! we pretty much grew up watching it...i think we watched it 5 times in a week (ok..getting scarey now!!! sorry!!) but yeah... i just wanted to you to know that i really like those movies, and that you really do rock!

anyway...
enough of that.

from rach

ps. great description of wesley crusher!

Helllllllo Scottsdale Arizona!!!!!!!!!! Ha Ha, mint in box!

man, these books have to come back in print soon so the rest of us poor folks can read it without paying 50+ bucks! And I only say this cause I really want to read it.

DANZA WANTS TO KNOW WHY YOU PUT A MINT IN THE BOX.

OK, BYE.

wow. you were air brushed into one hot stud muffin!!!

too bad they didn't use you as a model for your action figure, though. *grin*

oooooo that i had a job so i could bid on your images.

s

I totally wasn't airbrushed.

Well, okay, maybe my boobs and some cellulite. But the face is all me, baby.

Wil,
Your character will be never be forgotten.

FG

"Wesley Crusher: Mint In Box"

mmmm...mint.

OMG this is funny. Whil is rolling in dough now......okay maybe not but he is on his way.

And what is wrong with your ass being on fire. I light my ass on fire several times a day, and I have a beautiful ass (seriously). :p

"Helllllllo Scottsdale Arizona!!!!!!!!!! Ha Ha, mint in box!
Posted by Shemily at December 11, 2003 08:17 PM "

Scottsdale? No no Its all about Glendale, Home of the Arizona Cardinals. :s Oh who am I kidding.

“Housebroken”, what the love & guidance of a good woman (Anne) can’t achieve.

I'm amazed at what these items still rake in as cash. They're just up for less than a day and already outside my budget range. There must be something about Wil selling them himself... you probably get a can of 100% pure and genuine Wil Wheaton essence (guaranteed to raise your geek level by 3 steps) with them or something like it ;-)

Now I'm waiting for one of those T-Shirts to stay in a price range I am comfortable with... that's below 50 :-P

Wanted the Borg-9 shirt....
'Ship onto to USA'
The bane of my expat experience....

SHIP OVERSEAS.

Man, for this money, order up some more t-shirts from the people that printed them, the are worth a fortune....

Cardinals Rock!!!!!! Or they have good intentions, anyway. That action figure doesn't do you justice man.

wil! whaddya trying to do, get me fired?! i can't even keep a straight face with all that magnificent gold ink & reasonable/unreasonable autograph criteria! ah ha ha ha ha ha!!!! i knew it was more than just your good looks that inspired that raging crush i had on you when i was eight.

keep up the good work!

If you buy this, whatever you do, do NOT buy The Traveller. I made the mistake of buying them both on the same shopping trip and when I got home and took them out of the back, they were both gone.

Hee hee. I love the descriptions. I now have this incredible urge to use the phrase "hang me up in the store hole" in conversation somehow.

C-DUB

Ah, the late 80s. I remember my friend George and I would walk around doing our Patrick Stewart impressions:
WHERE'S THE BOY?!
WHERE'S YOUNG WESLEY CRUSHER?!

I almosat choked to death, on the poster and your discription. LOL, your a crack head ! !

Mr. Mom reference on the EarnestBorg9 shirt description? Classic.

Excellent work.

This could generate one helluva income. At this rate, you could start selling Wil Wheaton's Belly Lint or Toe Jam w/ pictures of Wil actually picking it, as proof of authenticity. Judging from the actions of the clock, doll, and t-shirt, the lint alone may have a street value of $30.

The possibilities are endless, Wil.

EB

Hey, my belly button lint is for one thing, and one thing only: late night snacking.

The thing I love most is the descriptions for each item. Those are hilarious. If only I had money to bid ;-)

c'om, wil -- they airbrushed the whites of your eyes and smoothed out any skin irregularities for sure. maybe it is the pose, but you look hotter in that photo than i ever remember you looking on air (sorry!).

regardless, you are still a fine figure of a man (don't worry, Ann, i'm just sayin' --i ain't touchin'!) *grin*

please make more Ernest Borg 9 shirts --they are hilarious and would make you a tiny mint!

s
(ps i grew up in Wheaton, IL -- do i get a consolation prize?)

heh. loving the description....

Which just begs the question.... Has anyone ever really asked you to sign your picture with "I loved being your bitch in prison?" I mean, WHERE do you come up with this stuff? Selling good though, guess you and Anne can get eachother the watch band and hair ribbon for Christmas now. Oh wait, you two don't do Christmas presents do you?

www.willwheaton.com

Did you know about this guy?

Wil,
You are a scream. (and Arcadian Del Sol's comment was pretty funny too)

Mothr Jesus Balls. You're sure raking in the dough with those auctions, Uncle Willie. Wish I had that kind of cash on hand, I'm STILL waiting to get a copy of Dancing Barefoot. But oh well, the new edition will be out soon, and I can wander into a bookstore and pick it up...

I particularly liked "Help, my ass is on fire" which is not a completely unreasonable request, if your ass really was on fire...

hey, it could happen...

...just saying is all...

suppose I'll go bid now!

Em

That is so sweat. Now if I only had the money I might bid on one but I am broke.

I wonder if it is hard to part with any of that stuff? It seems like it would be, having been a part of such an incredible series. I'm not a huge sci-fi fan but I absolutely loved TNG and always wondered what it would have been like to be a part of the making of that; even just walking the set! Your character was pretty neat too.

It must've been so amazing to work with that cast and wonderful series.

LOL

I just love that you used "woobie" in the description for the t-shirt.

I will believe it is because you saw my pretty purple icon of The Sexy and the word just stuck!

Good luck with the auction...and you know if you want a bid to have more of those shirts made...just shout out.

g aka gradeafan

"What's reasonable? Something like "Hooray for you!" or "Look at that large interesting thing over there!" or "Thanks for watching Star Trek."
What's unreasonable? Something like, "I loved being your bitch in prison," or "Help me, my ass is on fire!"

HAHAHAHA!! That's priceless. Thanks for the laugh Wil!

awwwwwwwwww i want to bid i registered and i have a trusty mastercard that i need to win the lotto to cover but hey its Wil, HMIC the man the myth the legend!! grrrrrrrrrrrr E-bay wont let me in......maybe they know! maybe big brothers watching! NB to the lass who said she was sounding like a freak... ditto i watched toy soldiers every day for months... i can still reel of the script! i am a freak, i love Sean i even have a sam gamgee action figure rare one thats from the fellowship signed! and he signed while i watched! WOOHOO ME!! oh to be able to afford that signed action figure!! i'll try again later, i really like the T's.....

Andrea xx

Hey Wil,

OT:
I was reading an article ( http://www.onlamp.com/pub/a/onlamp/2003/12/11/myths.html ) on O'Reilly (from /.) and I saw a familliar looking book cover under "Related Reading"

http://www.oreilly.com/catalog/barefoot/index.html?CMP=IL7015

This is the first "real" publicity I've seen for it. Way to go, Wil.

Oooh, auctions! *drools*

*goes to find hidden credit cards*

The descriptions contain "cleaned out the garage":

If you can walk from one side to the other now, you'll have to change your name, or change this entry:
http://www.wilwheaton.net/mt/archives/000869.php
[Ah...the magic of google]

Too bad you're selling off the action figures. A Westley figure, MIB, owned by Wil Wheaton since purchase would be quite a display piece when the 37th Star Trek series is on.

- Craig [who has a garage for the first time and is quite happy about the fact that the car fits in it.]

I'd bid on the action figure, but I don't know what my 3 klingon figures would do do him after i put him in the box...

Idiot Troll.
67.60.135.191

great descript. on the item!...

i think i've finally figured out where i sense our commonality... you and i have the same sense of wit.. not typically admired...but often appreciated for its entertainment value...

i'm not a trekkie, or a trekker, though i've seen probably every TNG episode thanks to a ritual my wife and i once adhered to, and thanks to 'Bonus Treks' , and i don't have hundreds to bid on the item(s)..but again, thanks for a laugh and a smile for the end of another work week...

I am really pleased that the autographed copy of Dancing Barefoot is selling for more than any of the Star Trek stuff.
Congrats Author Wil Wheaton. You have surpassed years and years of cult TV! (Not that I don't go for that cult TV stuff, because I grew up watching every afternoon, just waiting for that green woman episode to play!)

Can I just say HOLY FREAKING COW?!

I read your blog today at around two.

I went to my holiday work party (it's a community college, they had a sing along, I left)and came back at 2:30 or so.

The autographed pictures had gone from $70 to $100!!! In a half an hour!!!

If I were you, I'd reconsider the whole belly lint thing, and maybe throw some of Ferris's fossilized poop in for good measure.

Really cool, Wil! Got anything else???

:)

Peppermint,Spearmint or Junior?

Though i'm sure you have probably seen this already....I was thinking that maybe there was a slight chance you hadnt. You may want to check this out....

[link to newgrounds deleted -- sorry, it made the screen scroll all yucky]

Quite insane!

wow. good job on the prices. quite a compliment.
do you want to do a trade? i got a really cute 8/10 and one hell of a signature... i mean, autograph.

If all the collectors got together to act as one, would we call them the collective?

Scott

"I made myself giggle ... "

You are a girly man.

Wow.. I'd love to have your autograph... but I can't afford $100!

I'm always very weary about buying autographed merchandise on Ebay. I mean, there are so many fake autographs out there. ;)

EB

Almost spit a perfectly good Sprite all over this monitor here at work when I read your declaration that your belly button lint was reserved exclusively for "late night snacking."

How did you get so good with the funny? Is there a course I can take to enhance my funny skills? How much do I have to pay for said course?

Robert: I think the answer is likely to be the comedy school of hard knocks; in other words, you have to get up in front of an audience. I've never done improv comedy, but I suspect it's somewhat like other improvisational work. When its on, it's on, but sometimes, the room just isn't right, and you can go down in flames.

Wil's done a bunch of that stuff with his group, Earnest Borg9 (sp?). They did a rip-off of the mirror-universe TOS episode, where Wil got to play the evil-mirror-universe Wesley. From the description, it sounded hella-funny.

I think what you pay for the courses in the said school is many, many nights where you wonder why you don't have a desk job.

Hey Wil! Love the action figure! "Look at that interesting thing over there!" haha Your too funny.... I wish i had the money to buy your stuff... o well... congrats to whoever gets it! can i borrow it sometime? :-)

Well now... there are so many things I'd love to bid on (especially the action figure) but since I cleaned myself out on the last eBay auction, methinks i'd better not start bidding on this one!

Having said that, I've read my $4-a-page Dancing Barefoot AND IT TOTALLY, TOTALLY ROCKS! With a v cool inscription, too... So get bidding, people!

I'll go back to the corner where i'm hiding from my bank statements now. :-) But hey - get carried away with the bidding - its totally worth it, cos wil is the best ebayer ever!

He's housebroken, and likes to play with Nanites.

Ya bastage! I was drinking a diet coke when I hit that line. Now I gotta go clean my keyboard!

:)

Cool site, nice content! My blog's only been around for over a month (I'm new to blogging). Was great to find yours, and take a trip down memory lane! All of the Star Treks have been constant pals of mine since the '60s. Glad to see you're branching out, and (now that I've seen your humor is Doc-compliant) I'll check out your book as well.

D

Completely irrelevant and off topic, but if you haven't seen this I thought you might find it amusing. :)

http://www.dangermouse.net/irregular/comics/irreg0242.jpg

Apologies for wasting your time if you have.

I don't know if you're aware, but your book is already on sale at O'Reilly:
http://www.oreilly.com/catalog/barefoot/

The really funny thing, however, is the 'Related O'Reilly books': 'Evil Geniuses in a Nutshell'? 'The Root of All Evil'? followed up with 'User Friendly'? (Then, of course, then 'The Best of The Joy of Tech')

Such good company. Heehee.

Will you find this comment way down at the bottom, three days after the post? I've been trying not to whine . . . but I don't seem to be getting emails when you've posted lately. Somethin' broken, maybe?

Jamie

meagre pickings for wil today. the book's only going for 170 at time of posting. hopefully the rent's covered from other fronts :)

I have a Wesley action figure still in the box...too bad it isn't signed...:::sad. Anyways thanks for the laugh, I needed that! You are too funny!

Hrm, that action figure looks like Jerry O'Connell! "Who's Wil Wheaton? Oh, that kid from 'Stand By Me?' No problem!"

OMFG the description is so funny. And now I'm peeved that I did'nt know that action figure existed! I want one!
Wow, the bids have gone pretty high...
ooh, hey, you liked Pirates of the Caribbbean too? I watched it about 3 times.
"But why's the rum gone?" lol.
Ok, I'll shut up now.

Hey Wil....

I know you've got to make money, too...but what about us ordinary folks who can't afford to pay over $100.00 for your signature like some of the crazy folks out there? I mean, if we can't get you to sign as our "prison bitch," is it really worth $300.00?

In any event, I'm really am (not being sarcastic) happy for you that the auctions are going well.

-AT

I am loving that picture.......that look just says I MADE OUT WITH ASHLEY JUDD. :)

What?? That action figure looks nothing like you. But what action figure does, right? Still, they come closer than that one often. Who the freak made it?

In other news, someone I know re-wrote the lyrics to some Christmas tunes to be "A Star Trek Christmas." One of the tunes was about Wesley and sung to the tune of "God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen":

I'm at Starfleet Academy and I'd just like to say
I miss the opportunity to weekly save the day --
To make things worse I have to be in some dumb Christmas play!
Yes I'm bright though I'm just a teenaged boy, a teenaged boy,
And the Enterprise was my most fav'rite toy.

You completely missed the opportunity to plug your action figures taking the Robin Leflar action figure to Bootytown.

bah ha ha ha ha

I crack myself up.

i must admit to totally having missed the auctions. how much did the copies of mr wheaton's signature go for in the end?

Uhm, you got 197.50 for it? Wow. That's damn impressive for a mini-you.
Also, did you notice it doesn't look like you?

Very cute description, Wil. Makes me wish I had that kind of money . . . I didn't notice until you pointed out that the "hang me up in the store hole" was still filled, so I'm probably not "a good home" for him anyway.

i think you were great on star trek,