Glad the community is back online. Congrats on fixing it. And congrats on all of your other victories lately. I feel much better about myself and my own seemingly small victories when I read about yours which are no less significant to you than mine are to me. You make me see how cool it is to be happy with what I have.

You rock. Keep it up.

geo

That really was beautiful, Wil. Not only is hearing about you being happy with yourself wonderful, but it helps us (well, me anyway) find perspective within my own life and enjoy it. Thanks.

wow! a first comment! prolly since no one knows they're back.

\m/

That was a very nice blog Mr. Cleaver. The shirt looks very dapper today...did you press it? How is Mrs. Cleaver today? She looked very nice last time I saw her. Are Wally and the Beave around?

good for you Wil. Congrats.

Finding true love and happiness is never easy, but once you find and take hold it is a beautiful thing, just like your title says. Never let that go!

I'm also glad the comments are back. Don't let a few losers spoil it for all the rest of us.

Ryan and Nolan are totally lucky to have you, as I'm sure they know.

Rockin!

Year 3 into my software engineering job I kinda came to the same conclusion. I work there to pay the mortgage and spend time doing things I would rather do. If I *enjoy* my job, it's a bonus!

Yay...comments are back.

Wil...we're patiently waiting for your first science fiction novel that will re-vitalize the genre and become a famous film directed by Stephen Spielberg.

We're all very happy for you.

Glad commenting is back.

As now a long time reader, I'm glad to see the progress that you've made in your life. You may not even realize it, but you're one of the true success stories, even if it's taken you a while to get there. Why is that? Because you've found inside you what makes -you- happy.. and you've realized that you need to do things for you and your family. Many people -never- figure that out. :)

Keep it up. Please keep on blogging. I'll keep on reading. :)

Congratulations man, I envy you so much.

Thanks for your posts. You make me think. Also, it's gratifying that you are using this as a way to do good in a small, personal yet effective way rather than in a huge public self aggrandising way.

[holy run-on sentences, Batman!. But I'm just sayin']

Wil,

I always enjoy reading about your family. Its wonderful to know that you love, being a father and husband. I am so happy for you.....

Funny how priorities change so much over time. I think it is wonderful that you chose to spend some time with your family.
I am also glad to see the comments back up and running.. can't wait to see you on the World Poker Tour.. sheesh how cool is that? Are your feet touching the ground?

Wil, I know you probably hear it a lot, but I think it frequently when I read your blog: you're giving wonderful gifts to your children. I aspire to be a father like you when I eventually get some chitlins of my own. Nice job.

Yay Wil, sounds like you've found your perspicacity, or whatever it was that Lisa Simpson lost. No, wait.

Well, at the risk of sounding like I'm taking a page from a Frank Capra script, you found (well, you've probably known for a while, but anyway...) what's really important to you. Either this is the moment where Rod Sterling steps out from behind a tree, or it's the moment that you realize that nothing is better than hang out and value with Anne and the guyzos.

Personally, I'm putting my money on the second one.

Glad we've got the community back, as many others have said already. \m/

Glad to see the comments section back. I am glad that you have seen the good in your life. It really helps you when that happens.

When you love your life it shows in other ways. Good things happen to good people. You are good people.

Beth Rose Pizana

Yay comments!!!

That was gorgeous, and I am glad you found peace of mind Wil. Writing is healing and self-discovery,and it sounds like you have found what you've been looking for! :)

Weds. night must be the universal D&D night. It was at our house tonight, so I had to take the kidlets and get my geek on in some other way. I love gaming, I do. But D&D is just not my cup of tea. I end up fireballing my own party constantly.

Anyway, I know the feeling. It's nice to not have to impress people anymore and just worry about the things that really matter, which is just your family. Too many men and women don't realize it and too many kids grow up in shitty homes because of it. Your kids are lucky to have you as a dad. Keep up the great work :)

Maybe you shouldn't refer to them as "stepkids", even if they are. If you act like a father around them, then perhaps you should refer to them simply as your kids, whether or not that's the legal definition.

Calling them stepkids seems as though you expect more kudos. These aren't my real kids, but look at what I'm doing. I'm even more wonderful.

Just thoughts. The word "stepkid" annoys me.

mdsh... He used to do just that until the "biological father" caused them a great deal of legal trouble over him referring to them as his kids.

I assure you.. he loves them as his own, anyone who has read his blog can see that.

:)

Yes! Comments have returned! So much to say, so little space. Hope the Marathon went well! Bet you were sore after that experience, weren't you...

But the pain comes with a great benefit, of course!

Glad to see "I Am Hubby/Stepfather" has taken over for "I'm Not Wesley." That's where your best entries really come from, your interaction with Anne and the boys. Family = good stories = more book material = writing career for Uncle Wil! Not to mention everything you get from your family anyway. Pretty good job to have, I'd say...

Hey Wil,

It's good to see the comments back up! Reading your post struck a chord with me. It's hard to keep things in perspective and in balance and too often it seems that we either let WORK become the end all and be all or conversely, family. Good for you that you have found a palace of balance between different in your life and that you clearly see where your priorities are.

Cheers! Sara

Gah! I meant a PLACE of balance. : )

Sara

Great to have the comments back, and Wil, great to see you are enjoying life and have found happiness. I hope we can all have that one day

>I've finally realized what's important to me, and why.

You'll probably find, if you haven't already, that you'll continue to realize what's important to you as you age (not like once you realize it, it stays that way), because the focus of life changes, again and again, often without our realizing it. I think it is those times when life's focus has shifted, and we have not shifted with in, that we find our inner selves in doubt, dispair, or chaos. In realizing what's important to us, we realign ourselves with that focus.

Sorry if I just sounded like someone's dad. I'm actually close to your age.

Hey Wil~
It is nice to see that there is a regular acting family in Hollywood. Iam just buying my first house and in the past few months a lot of growing up on my part has been done. As I start fixing the house I am sure more will happen.
Keep on Keepin on.....
Richard

Ahhh Wil... I love seeing you in anything because you are a delight. I'm happy to see a 'celeb' blogging. Sure there are more out there, but too much on my plate to notice.

Yes... the wife and kids ARE important. YOU and what YOU want, are as well. My mother died on the 9th, and at 33, I'm just NOW realizing just what is important to me and for me.

Good luck with everything that you do.

Isn't it amazing how kids change your life? I only have one and I have no idea how my life was before him. I don't know whatI'd do without him.

I'm so happy you're happy......:D

Look at it this way: being a (step)dad just means you're the GM for awhile.

How's that scenario you're working up for them coming?

You know, you could always use MNPR:RPG. . . I sent you a copy. :)

CU

I came to this same realisation not too terribly long ago, and it has made all of the difference.

Your family was already fortunate to have you, and now they have more of you.

This is a Perfect Thing.

You know Wil the more I read your blog the more I look at myself and say "damn why can I not be that smart?" I won't bore everyone with all the details except to say some things at work right now are not going well. I spent most of yesterday depressed actually and was starting to dred going in today. I read your entry and now I am kicking myself for letting it get to me like I did. So much for " I want to be like Mike" cause I want to be more like Wil! Thanks for reminding us all about the important things.

Am wondering...

What happened with the doors and windows project for the house?

The meditation back garden work?

And the all important A/C installation?

Woot!! on doing an EQ2 voice, am a fan of the game, so will look to see if I can recognize you.

Sony's lawyer to earn their keep harrassing you over a third party error - bunk!

Centered on family - I am thinking there is an adult inside there, Wil, lol. 'bout time, eh?

That's beautiful. Well said.

I think you've hit on what so many people have lost (even non-actors). If you love what you're doing, and you're doing it for you (not just to make money, or prove you're cooler than Wesley), you are working for the right reasons. So many people work their 40-hour weeks just to get the check on Friday when it's all over. Check out "The Culture Industry" by Adorno. He talks about this same thing and how America is driven by money instead of creating something beautiful and satisfying. It's pretty interesting how relevant this book can be even almost sixty years after it was written.

Good for you and the family with regards to the way you feel about your family.

Further kudos for starting to run. Enjoy it.

Betrayer!

How can you leave your party behind when they are trying to fend off the evil orcs!

I love to spend time with my family too, but coming together once a week with my friends to play D&D is something I can't miss....and whoever misses the game is a BETRAYER!!!

Hooray for comments!!

I hope this doesn't sound weird, but I wish you were my dad, Wil....eventhough that would be absolutely impossible time wise and genetically, but whatever. That's just so awesome.

Well said Wil. I've also come to that realization recently (though it took a kick in the pants to do so). I find that I'm happier now not spending hours on end in front of a computer screen playing MMORPG's. After all, my day job is spending hours in front of a computer screen hacking out software.

BTW, the MooHarpist sends congrats on the marathon. and says "About time you caught up to me!"

You know what most parents know and are compelled towards. It's all about the kids! People who don't have children (step or not) can't really comprehend the depth of feeling that goes with this. I knew it was there on an intellectual level before I had kids, but I never really *knew* how deep it went, how strong it was. It's your greatest source of fear and strength. It's the most powerful force in the universe.

Help!
I remember hearing an audblog from July 14, 2003, where Wil said that his whole life just changed, absolutely for the better, but he couldn't tell us now. I have looked all over the site (a "Search" feature would be nice, Wil) and I can't for the life of me figure out what changed? Maybe it wasn't as big of a deal, or it was too personal? Either way I would like to know, this has been killing me for a couple months now.

Anyone know?

Wow. That was inspiring. I don't have kids yet, and I've always been afraid that when you have kids, you lose your own personality. Thanks to you, this blog, and others I've met online, I realize that having kids doesn't change who you are. It makes you...you, with kids. ^_^ I won't have to stop watching science fiction & being a geek & reading manga & painting my toenails green & wearing 40 bracelets on one arm. I'll just have kids who'll wanna do it, too.

Thanks for sharing. Seriously. Keep it up.

*tear drops*...sniff...sniff - I think our boy is all growed up.

You so 'get it' Wil, what really matters and where true happiness lies. It's a good thing.

Much continued happiness

Wil,
So glad to have the comments back... I missed them! I'm so very happy to see you are happy and that you have come to the realization that family is everything.

Wil,

Glad you figured out what's REALLY important. I figured it out a couple of years ago and it's made all the difference.

Paul,

I believe he had just gotten the call from O'Reiley offering him the three book deal.

Craig

yay, comments. cos for ages I've wanted to say that the American Doormat Rant in the audioblog is fab:)

THIS is why I come to your site. Your politics don't mesh with mine, and just when I get sick of reading political commentary (and swear I'm never coming back) you write an entry like this and it makes it worth while. Anne and the boys are very, very lucky to have you in their lives as I'm sure you feel the lucky to have them in your life.

Yay on getting the comments back, I keep forgetting to visit the Soap Box. My bad.

Wil, the more I'm here the more I know...You Know.
It's good to know there are other kindred spirits in this world. You inspire, act on your values, and you do what's right. I send my best wishes to you and your family. You all are very fortunate. Congratulations and Thanks!

Wil, the more I'm here, the more I know,
You Know.
It's good to know there are other kindred spirits in this world. You inspire, act on your values, and you do what's right. I send my best wishes to you and your family. You all are very fortunate. Congratulations and Thanks!

It sounds like you've really got your priorities straight. I was a little worried when you mentioned that you were still working up the D&D campaign for Ryan and Nolan. I really wanted to comment when you later were bragging about the boys and said you were a "gamer" dad instead of a "toolbench" dad. This is meant to be friendly advise, not mean-spirited, but it sounds like the boys are missing out on the advantage of having a gamer dad. Don't let this opportunity slip by; get those dice out and use them for Good!

You really are a very cool man, Wil. Just reading your post makes me a little sad since I have no children of my own to be a role model for.

I'm glad you have found peace and happiness in your life. It is quite a change from the tone of your posts that date back to when this site first opened. Keep on keepin' on.

Kind of a side - note and deep in comments, but I'm a geek runner too (and a dad by the way). Anyway, you're better read than I am but just in case you've never checked it out "The Loneliness of the Long Distance Runner" is so very worth reading. Probably you already have- but if not- I'm guessing you would really like it. It is also a movie but I've never seen it so I can't comment on that. It is also a song by Iron Maiden. Came out on what I think of as one of the 'later' albums- but still in the good ol' 80s. While I'm here- not to be too fan boy- but love the blog and your writing style. It has helped you which is cool and it's helped other people too. You probably will never know all the ways. (which is probably good- don't want that zaphod sized ego) Take care.

Congratulations!

Realising when you're honestly happy with what you've achieved makes for not only a content Wil but produces your best work is a fantastic achievement.

Keep focusing on your own happiness Wil, the rest will fall into place.

Bos.

Congratulations Wil my man, you now officially have a life! Having a life is like owning a car, or having a DSL line in your house. After you have it for a while you find yourself wondering 'How the heck did I ever get by without this?' And you never go back. And you're all the better for it...

For West Memphis Three:

The comment section for this entry was not up and I just saw this today.

I thought I would post a quick comment on case. Feel free to remove it if it's not in the appropriate place.

There is a new lie detector that has been developed that is suppose to be 100% accurate. It measures brainwave recognition. There is no way to get around it since your brain either recognizes something, or it doesnt.

MERMER (memory and encoding related multifacited electroencephlographic response) shows if a person recognizes a victim, a crime scene and a murder weapon. It aready has freed one man accused of murder from death row.

Here is a web site:
http://searchsecurity.techtarget.com/sDefinition/0,,sid14_gci779704,00.html

for futher infor, google: MERMER+lie detectors

Deb

Hi Wil,

WOW! That's a real epiphany! I've been reading your blog since September 2003, and I keep reading it because it shows what a wonderful human being you are. Your family is very lucky to have you.

Bye for now,

library_lady61

Wil, I really do envy you. Thanks for being able to be so transparent with the readers. My friend asked me what I was reading online the other day and I think I said "My friend Wil's Blog" LoL.

Wil, that was heartwarming. More fathers should appreciate their families, as you do. And that's all I got to say about that.

Hey, our group plays D&D every other Wed night too. Must be something about Wed because that seems to be a popular day for it - midweek so that people have a decent chance of making it.

Awesome! I have to agree with you, working is just a means to an end, so that we can come home, and enjoy our families. :) It's a wonderful feeling! I know.

I think I've been going through comment withdrawal...

Glad you've got your priorities straight...some of us take longer than others.

Told the spouse you're going to be on WPT HHG (I know, old news), and he thought it was totally cool. What charity are you playing for? I figure probably Leukemia & Lymphoma Society due to Kris (hope she's still doing awesome!), but if you need a good charity, you can check out this one if you're interested.

Okay, it's summertime so no homework, and the book's at the publishers...so it's time you got back to important business and get that campaign going for the boys...

I wonder if my husband feels the same way as Wil does becase he never hangs out with the guys anymore. I recently asked him why he never goes by his friends anymore and he said he would rather stay home with us. My husband is not a wonderfully verbal man and I like to think that Wil is expressing what a lot of husbands may feel but can't say.

Wil,
*sniff* *sniff*
Wow. Thank you for that.

wil,

thanks for letting us eavesdrop on your life. you're one hell of a guy. \m/ you rock!

#1: \m/ on getting the comments back...I missed 'em, too, probably more than I should let on...

#2: I know how you feel...the most fulfilling parts of my day are being at home with my husband and our three cats, just being a family. Your post made me smile...heck, I'm still smiling!

Just don't miss too many D&D sessions, or your character gets NPCed by one of your "pals", and they use him to set off all the traps, soak up all the arrows, and when he finally goes below -10 HP, they swipe all his magic goodies. MWA HAHAHAAHAHAH!

Hey Wil, I'm just wondering why you always seem to refer to your kids as "stepkids"? I understand that's what they are, but I dunno...I guess I feel as if it's like saying, "this is my adopted son," when really, why not just tell people it's your son and leave it at that? Why the need for specifics?

I miss RIFTS.

People ask all the time about Ryan and Nolan, and why I refer to them as "my stepkids."

I adore them, and there is no difference in my mind between "stepkids" and "kids."

While I have chosen to not make it an issue, other adults in their lives have, and I don't claim them as "my kids" out of respect to them.

Because I love them, and it's not about me.

Wil,

Yes. Exactly. A job is what you do to make a living. It's not who you are. When you're at home with your family, that's what you live for.

There's nothing better than parenting. There's also nothing harder. Sounds like you're doing a good job in the step-dad role, and that's an extremely difficult thing to do well.

Good job.

No worries Wil,
You do what you do out of love and respect for who they are not because you need to make a "distinction". Trust me us stepkids understand.
Rock, Rock on!

I'm just getting started in this crazy town and let me tell you, having family to come home to is the most wonderful feeling. "My Support Group," as I call them, is essential for my success and sanity.

What's really funny is when I look at my calendar and see that I've scheduled the quality time in with "The Group" when things begin to get busy.

Wil -- Meant no offense by the question. Was just wondering. Take care.

Your love for your family is inspiring. As for the "kids/stepkids" semantic argument, no one who has read your blog can question the fantastic relationship you have with the boys, nor the mutual love and respect you have for each other. You have done a wonderful job parenting them, and actions speak louder than words. Perspective? My step-mother (of 12 years) refers to me as "Bob's daughter" - an all-too accurate representation of her feelings toward me.

I hope you had a great time on Father's Day, and I'm so happy for you. It's great when you know what you really want in life, and what's really important to you. I can tell how much you love your family, and that rocks. :)

Family means everything. If I had nothing else, but my family, I would still have "everything"

(((hugs)))

www.panta-loons.boydism.net/forum/index.php

Just got out of Fahrenheit 911 (r4wk5), went to Michael Moore's site, saw mention of Stupid White Men, and remembered seeing it recommended in... oh yeah, I wonder how WWDN is getting along! It's been a loooong time since I visited the mighty WWDN, a healthy 9ish months?

This drop sample was a little disappointing. I never minded the self-promotion with the goings-on, and it still delivers on that trademark voyueristic high.

But the rest has gone super sappy.

This post was sweet, but sweet like a chocolate sundae with sugar coated chocolate bombs, topped with processed sugar and a light sprinkling of candy on top, with a side of insulin for the instant onset of adult diabetes.

Dude.

I'm not buying it. Huge fan o' kids, and I'm totally down with the whole nurturing exercise. Lotta fun, rewarding, the love & growth of wee ones, etc.

But your reply to the one seemingly negative comment was the tip-off that your life has not yet become a Hallmark greeting card and with any luck...

Come on.

A little affirmation is cool and 70+ comments of affirmation is way cool and assuming that's a 10:1 ratio of silent:loud peeps, then hundreds of affirmations is Way Hella +5 Frostband Cool with a hot chick engraved on the blade.

You obviously do give at least un petit poo what people think of you. If all these creative things were just for you, you'd just do 'em, not do 'em and talk about them to gazillions of people at the expense of your opportunities to be creative by landing roles by inspiring confidence in the paranoid that your lips are zipperly.

Right?

I so don't blame you. Quite the opposite. Helps me identify. You went through serious scaries as a committed young actor who found himself in a infamously grusome role and the target of metric assloads of unwarranted ire. It resembles altogether too closely my lifelong battle with my own self-esteem, the relentless attempts of the little inner voices to give me shit I so don't need.

And as a new identification bonus, I just got back a DVD of my first bit part in an indie flick. As I watched it in slack-jawed horror, what came out of my mouth was something like the sound of orgasm, as heard through the ripped out gurgling throat of the undead. Shocked at this clear evidence of my fear of photons that were there whether or not a camera was sniffing them, I forced myself to show it to a single friend, point blank, and I don't think I've convulsed and squirmed so hard in my life. If I had my druthers, this unforgiving documentary of a poor performance would go with me to an early grave. But if I hope to grow, I had better get back on the horse and try showing it to two friends.

I don't know what that reaction is, but it's some kind of boundary condition in my head where everything goes way, way non-linear, and you've been through that writ large. Whole new levels of respect. I realize now I had no clue, no idea at all.

I utterly remember wincing in sympathetic pain every time Ensign C graced that blasphemer's production, the performance squished out of every actor but particularly the actor that pwned on Stand by Me, and were I in his shoes, after getting a usenet group named after my recurring role's forced-march lameness, I'd retreat to the nearest couch, go fetal, and take my food in liquid form through a nose hose, praying for a wicked case of Alzheimer's.

Or, assuming I somehow mustered your powerful mental trooper kung fu, I'd still grow up pretty, pretty, prettyyyyyyyy needful of appreciation to make up for whatever the conventional traumatic equivalent is, severe childhood beatings about the breast, chest, neck and head?

Fess up.

Your creativity is not just for you. You want to please. Fan lovins is good lovins.

I think that's such an important lesson for people to learn in life...or at least me. That you don't need validation from everyone to be happy, whole and accepted as you are. You don't need to be a big moviestar or a New York Times Best Seller List author (although admittedly that'd be kick-ass). You can be cool just the way you are.
That's something I've learned from my good friend Missy, and you.
So thanks. :-)

Thought you'd like to hear about my husband's recent gaming experience over in Iraq.

I bought him a sweet laptop a couple months ago.

My husband has gone through the same thing emotionally, wanting to center his life around me. Originally he wanted to be a career Army officer, but after a while apart he came to the realization I was more important to him than military (something he'd wanted to do his whole life). When we found out how soon he'd be going to Iraq, he decided to do the minimum before getting out, rather than going to Officer Candidate School and having his contract extended in the least bit. He turned 29 this week.

Family is the most important thing there is, one thing this experience has taught me. I'm glad you've made that realization. Many guys never do.

D&D?! Haha, you ARE a geek ;p

I also had the "what is *really* important to me" epiphany smack me upside the head one day a few years back.

So few people realize that if you find what is important to you, the rest either falls in line or fades away. And, in any form of media, the life can be sucked out of you at an alarming pace. I'm glad to see you thriving, Mr. Wheaton.

And, the happiness you have found most certainly shines through in your writing.

Your Rock Wil, you'r always my favorite character on star trek and you were hilarious in the weakest link episode stay cool

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