hey Wil,
Glad to hear that Sketch is doing better... and I agree with Anne's decision regarding giving Felix another week to see if his quality of life improves. Still sending mucho mojo, positive karmic energy and white light to the kitties and their humans.
Take care,
Terry

Posted by: oboeterry at March 17, 2005 01:06 AM

p.s. Happy St. Patrick's Day to you, Anne, Ryan, Nolan and all of the non-humans at the Wheaton household!

T :-)

Posted by: oboeterry at March 17, 2005 01:11 AM

Wil, matters of faith or metaphysical stuff often don't make logical sense...don't worry about explaining yourself. I wish you and Anne the very best with Sketch's treatment.

Posted by: Chuck at March 17, 2005 01:43 AM

Wil, the cats both respond to the concern and intonation of your voice and they observe body language instinctively as we all wish we could do. Bottom line, they WILL tell you how they feel and what they want to do, you just have to allow them to be abstract about it. Cats are not humans, but they certainly bring out the best in us :)

Posted by: nickzname at March 17, 2005 01:47 AM

So here I am, at stupid o'clock in the morning reading about your cat bawling my eyes out. I feel for you I guess. I remember when my cat, Bullwinkle, decided that it was time to go, and died in my lap. One minute he was there, then... Just gone. I miss him so very much even though he peed on everything. I suppose that was part of his charm, the smell of his fur, the feel of his purr in my chest, and so on. I'm so sorry that you are in the position of having to make such a dreadful choice. I wish you all the best in this dark and worrysome time.

Posted by: greentrench at March 17, 2005 02:04 AM

I know Felix and Sketch aren't human members of your family, but they are still your family and they can tell you things. All cats do after a while, it's how they rule the roost :D

My Paddy can say hello (he's heard us say it to him so often the "mow-ow"s at us when we meet), tell us he's hungry, tell us the kitchen door's open and can we come and close it please and tell us when he wants a cuddle. He can tell my Dad that he knows he needs to take this horrible tablet and can he get on with it please and I'm sure when his time eventually comes he'll let us know that he's had enough of the tablets, injections, blood sampling and endless trips to the vet and he'd just like to go to sleep please. Right now he's letting us know he's a happy cat with a warm bed and those vets trips mean more food, so that's ok with him.

Felix will let you know Wil, just the same as Sketch. Thinking of all of you right now and sending Felix all the mojo in the world.

Posted by: Claire at March 17, 2005 02:18 AM

I know Felix and Sketch aren't human members of your family, but they are still your family and they can tell you things. All cats do after a while, it's how they rule the roost :D

My Paddy can say hello (he's heard us say it to him so often the "mow-ow"s at us when we meet), tell us he's hungry, tell us the kitchen door's open and can we come and close it please and tell us when he wants a cuddle. He can tell my Dad that he knows he needs to take this horrible tablet and can he get on with it please and I'm sure when his time eventually comes he'll let us know that he's had enough of the tablets, injections, blood sampling and endless trips to the vet and he'd just like to go to sleep please. Right now he's letting us know he's a happy cat with a warm bed and those vets trips mean more food, so that's ok with him.

Felix will let you know Wil, just the same as Sketch. Thinking of all of you right now and sending Felix all the mojo in the world.

Posted by: Claire at March 17, 2005 02:24 AM

Wil,

I am still keeping your family in my thoughts and prayers. Its so hard to know what is best for our four-legged family members. Just do the best you can and do what's in your heart. Currently my mom is sick and in the hospital, so my talks with the Great Unknown are frequent. I hope everything works out for the best. Hang in there...

Sandra

Posted by: swl-mom2Bryn at March 17, 2005 02:26 AM

Wil-

The kitty's understand us much more than we understand them. It isn't as crazy as you think. Plus, those of the feline persuasion have a built in gene for listening.

Ask the kitty's what's up. They'll tell you. Just make no bones in what you say, and make it clear. Sometimes it's as simple as explaining the situation to them and then asking "So do you want ____?" ...waiting for response of some sort... then, "or do you want ____?" If it's important, I've never had a meower fail me in answering somehow, some way.

I'll keep Felix in the purr-box of my mind. He wants to fight, he'll get better.

-Eric

Posted by: Eric/Fyre at March 17, 2005 02:37 AM

Oh, Wil, you are not lame or stupid. There are different kinds of pet people, the ones who have animals (who are hardly ever allowed in the house) and the ones who have furry family members. We have four "fuzzy children" (otherwise known as cats) with distinct personalities, traits, and ways of interacting with us and each other. We have had all 4 of them for many years (ages 4,10,11, and 15) and before them there were others that we had to say goodbye to, including a couple of dogs when our kids were still at home. So the whole Hooper clan (Jamie, Mary, Coolit, Nikon, Zebra and Pooka) are sending the Wheaton clan LOTS of Kitty Mojo.This stuff really works!
ps Have you ever had a conversation with your cat? Sometimes, we just give in and meow back when they talk to us. We seem to have great communication - if only we knew what we were saying!

Posted by: Momcat at March 17, 2005 02:49 AM

:)

Posted by: Keith Xgaming at March 17, 2005 03:23 AM

Wil,

If there is one thing that I am sure of, it's that our household companions (of the non-human sort) can understand us.. at least our feelings. There is nothing lame about them telling you what they want, or you talking to them. Just like any other loved one, they tell us what they want and need with their body language. Whatever happens, if you act out of love, you will do what is right, for him and you.

As an aside, the one nice thing about kidney failure/disease is that you can be pretty sick and not really be in pain.. just a bit uncomfortable. I've been living with it for years now, and my biggest complaint isn't pain, it's feeling tired, and swollen and just ::blah::

As always, I will keep Sketch, Felix, and the rest of the Wheaton household in my prayers.

May you have a blessed St Patrick's Day..

Ocean McIntyre Ni an t'Saoir
-- Gho caed mile failte! --

Posted by: Ocean McIntyre at March 17, 2005 03:27 AM

Wil, you're not insane, or stupid, or whatever you think you might sound like, at all. Pets become part of the family, I think people who don't feel the way you feel right now are the strange ones. I always talk to my cat, and I'm convinced he understands and answers in his own way.

I'll keep you and your family, the human and the non-human members, in my thoughts.

Posted by: Stef at March 17, 2005 03:30 AM

Wil... you don't have to feel weird about the way you talk to your animals. I do think that if we are willing to be open to it, we can connect to animals... why should that not be possible? We may not be able to explain how it works, but didnt we used to be closer to nature, before the whole thing calling itself civilisation screwed things up? You do have a special connection to the universe, you have proven that often enough. Animals do. Children do. Only adults begin to lose it if they don't watch it. I used to talk to my budgie, and I was always sure he understood what I said, even íf not verbally. I had a sense of what was going on in him, too. After so many years together, you just connect. Once I went on a long trip (2 months) without telling him or saying goodbye properly, and boy, when I came back, he was pissed off. He wouldn't look at me for a week. But then, before I went to the US for a year, I told him I had to be away for a long time, but I would be back, and I would miss him. And when I came back, he was not pissed off, or alienated, he was really happy to see me. Immediately. Animals arent stupid. They are closer to us than we think, even though we are not able to stick a label to it. Just let it happen!

Apart from that smartassing... lots of healing mojo to both your kitties. I'll keep them in my thoughts and send good vibes their way.These stories are really touching!

Posted by: Patty at March 17, 2005 04:04 AM

Wil, I've been reading along @ the livejournal feed, and just wanted to say: Don't feel stupid for talking to your pets!

Language is more than the sounds coming from our mouths; it involves body language and other intangibles we take for granted. Animals don't take those things for granted, and respond to them. Think of evey time you've felt down and they all pile on you, snuggling close, purring and licking. Different species? Yes, but same tribe as far as heart is concerned. We all feel, we all think, and we all want to understand. Felix, and before him, Sketch, just want you to understand that they "hear" you, and will respond accordingly. Meaning, they can't say, "Dude! Help me out, will ya?", but they can make sure you see the hope and love in their eyes.

No wonder we love our pets - they communicate just like babies!

Continued *hugs* and *mojo* for your entire family, 4-leggers included, natch! ;-)

-Michele

Posted by: frogger at March 17, 2005 04:53 AM

I don't think it's stupid at all. You do what you have to do to take care of your family, even if it doesn't make sense sometimes. Your kitties will have happy lives and comfortable ends, which is the best thing you could ever do for them, IMO. How you get there doesn't matter. Best wishes in hard times. --j.

Posted by: Jessica at March 17, 2005 05:02 AM

I posted here a while back about having to think about putting my Haylee dog to sleep... I wont go on and on and on about it, but if you're bored and cant sleep or something (and this goes for all the readers/posters here) you can read about how I dealt with/handled it. it was one of the hardest things I've ever had to do and a month or so later I still hurt. I dunno, hand in there.

http://www.livejournal.com/users/zilpha/2005/02/23/

Posted by: zilly at March 17, 2005 05:09 AM

I posted here a while back about having to think about putting my Haylee dog to sleep... I wont go on and on and on about it, but if you're bored and cant sleep or something (and this goes for all the readers/posters here) you can read about how I dealt with/handled it. it was one of the hardest things I've ever had to do and a month or so later I still hurt. I dunno, hang in there.

http://www.livejournal.com/users/zilpha/2005/02/23/

Posted by: zilly at March 17, 2005 05:10 AM

You're not insane. I talk to my dogs like that all the time. Well, I would if I was back home in Long Beach. Hope they and you feel better.

PS: Your book is fantastic. Straight up fantastic.

Posted by: Ruth at March 17, 2005 05:14 AM

You don't sound lame at all, Wil. I do think pets let us know when they've had enough.

I had to put my childhood companion to sleep when she had CHF. I was 23, she was 13. We'd had her since she was 8 weeks old, and she was my sweet puppy. She was just listless, almost totally non-responsive, and seemed to be saying she'd had enough.

I cried all the way to the vet's office, and when I got there I couldn't speak. She had been there recently enough that the receptionist recignized her (but not me, since my parents had been taking her in because I traveled all week). I was so glad I didn't have to explain what I needed.

She was ready, and she let us know that. I think both of your kitties will let you know when they're ready, and I think they are letting you know that they're not ready yet.

Good thoughts for all of you headed in your direction.

Posted by: Toni at March 17, 2005 05:18 AM

My cat Sebastian was showing signs of diabetes for months before I knew what the problem was. Now that I've been giving him insulin injections twice/day for over a year, and it's become easier than brushing my teeth. He also has some anger issues where he gets so worked up and lashes out at anything near him, so I've had talks with him about calming down. I'd tell him he needs to figure out what he's really mad about and address it in nonviolent ways instead of displacing his anger, but I think that's going a little too beyond his comprehension level. I can hear him now, "Tiffany, I'm really angry that you put your foot in the way of the open door so that I couldn't run outside."

P.S. My mom talked to her philodendron (we'd had it for 20 years) before she threw it out because it was so sickly.

Posted by: _peregrinus_ at March 17, 2005 05:22 AM

Dude - Never feel bad/silly/stupid/etc. for being affectionate to a loved one... even if that loved one happens to walk on four legs. Sending plenty of Chicago mojo Felix's way, keep your spirits up.

--T

Posted by: t_knotts at March 17, 2005 05:23 AM

My aunt's cat was like her baby.. she had Willie since she was very young, and when he got sick, they didn't feel like they could put him down; it was too hard.
Willie ran away to die on his own.

That makes me very sad to think that he spent it alone, with no one there to hold him.
It was about 10 years ago, and my aunt is still heartbroken over it.
My grandmother kept my cat when I moved where I couldn't have pets, and a couple years ago she called me to tell me that Otis died.... I didn't even know he was sick!
She told me that he had been sick for awhile, and that he was in pain but she couldn't put him down, as she would feel badly. He spent a weekend in the snow in pain, and finally dies Sunday night. The ground was frozen and so she had to keep him in an old plastic container til the ground thawed so she could bury him.
*cries*
My Otis was dead and I wish I had been there to take him to the vet to put him down.

I know you guys will do the right thing, if it comes down to it. You may feel guilt for awhile, but imagine the guilt if Felix suffers...

I am keeping all of you in my thoughts, and sending out all the mojo I can muster!
*hugs you all*

Posted by: Jeannette311 at March 17, 2005 05:55 AM

Hello Wil,

May I recommend a book for you? Conversations With Animals by Lydia Hiby. I know it made me feel better about talking to my furbabies, snakes and turtles included.

Heather

Posted by: heather at March 17, 2005 06:03 AM

I'm so glad to hear how well Sketch is doing! It seems like everything you went through with Sketch kind of put you in a better place to make decisions about what to do with Felix, if that makes sense. It's just so hard to know what to do for our pets when they can't tell us what they WANT. I think you and Anne are totally doing the right thing for Felix, and like you said, you'll know when you know...

Keeping you and your kitties in my thoughts!

Posted by: Danielle at March 17, 2005 06:19 AM

I agree with all the above. C'mon Wil - you know better than to worry about what others think! You do what works for you and piss on any closed minded individual that wasn't held as a child that thinks there's something wrong with it!
Animals have different perception that us mere humans. They sense fear, when you're feeling down...etc What we call ESP (for humans) is a natural sense for animals. It's only logical to communicate with them the only way we know how. They understand.
Hoping for the best from the East Coast,
Sharfa

Posted by: Sharfa at March 17, 2005 06:30 AM

One of our oldest cats got sick last summer. He had been sick for a couple years with kidney problems, special diets, etc. But now he was really sick.

We did the fluids for a week, and it didn't work very well. He continued to lose weight at a rapid rate. He took the treatment extremely well. It didn't seem to hurt him at all...I think he could tell we were trying to help.

Finally, my wife had a talk with him, and she told him that we loved him, but if it was time for him to go, it was ok. The very next day, he was waiting in the carrier to go.

I don't doubt for a second that he knew it was time, and he was telling us it was ok. We still cried for a week.

All my best to you and your family, especially Felix and Sketch.

Posted by: milieu at March 17, 2005 06:33 AM

Hi Wil,
The feelings that you've expressed & things you've been doing with Felix are not silly or crazy. You've made me think of my own dog, who is now 10 years old. Although she's in good health now, I expect over the course of the next five years for that to change.
I've even started having converstaions with myself (and the dog) about some of the feelings that you are going through right now.
I hope my senses don't fail when when it's time to let go. Like you, I pray to God that I have the strength to make the right decision.
I joke with my dog sometimes about her just *once* being able to speak instead her driving me bonkers with that silly look when she wants something and I just can't figure out what. But, if she is ever to *speak* to me, as much as it might sound awful to say, I hope she is able to somehow let me know when it's her time to go. For as much unselfish love as my dog has given to me over the years, it would break my spirit and heart if for just one second she was miserable.
Felix will be in my thoughts & paryers...

Posted by: Janine at March 17, 2005 06:36 AM

Wil....

I've had dogs and cats all my life, and I have talked to each one of them, just as if they were my human companions. I truly believe they understand us through the tone of our voices. If there's ever any doubt whether a cat knows what you're saying to them, all I have to do is ask my Persian, Jean-Luc, if he wants treats. He immediately runs to his bed...a box of yarn covered by his own afghan and a towel...turns around and meows until I start serving them up. A few weeks ago, I had to take him to the groomer. I had a l-o-n-g talk with him on the 20-mile drive, telling him not to scratch or bite Laura. Three hours later, when she called to let me know he was ready to be picked up, she asked me what I did to him. She thought I had tranquilized him, because she said he never took a single swipe at her while she was working with him. It works!

Lots of human prayers and kitty mojo for Felix from Jean-Luc and me, as well as good thoughts, comfort and peace for you, and especially Anne. Ultimately, your little bear will be alright.

Wendy

Posted by: VoxyLady at March 17, 2005 06:46 AM

Wil, it doesn't sound stupid at all.

Posted by: doriette at March 17, 2005 06:55 AM

Dear Wil.

My best to you and your family. It's not crazy to talk to your animals, especially in such essential matters. We can have a very deep bond with them.
A few months ago I had to have that conversation with my lapso apso, who was going on 16 yrs. We had had him since he was 8 wks old. He had developed a quick-growing tumor in his lungs that was slowing strangling him. I held him in my arms and talked quietly. I literally asked him, as you did with your cats, what I should do. As I held him quietly, the answer came to me. He was tired of the struggle and he no longer felt good. With lots of tears, we took him to the vet for the last time.

While I hated having to go through the loss, this conversation has helped me know that we made the right decision.

Lots of good wishes I send to your kitty.

Posted by: TMcGaughey at March 17, 2005 07:00 AM

Thanks for being so open about your life. I was having one of those "no faith in humanity" kind of days, and you reminded me that there is hope in just about any situation. Thanks!

Posted by: Bri at March 17, 2005 07:02 AM

There is nothing metaphysical about a bond with a loved-one--regardless of how many feet they might have. You communicate with your animals every day--and they communicate with you in return.

Not in words, no. But you know when Ferris is hungry or wants to go out or play. You know when Sketch or Felix is annoyed or wants company or food. They communicate in the only way they know how and you do the same. There's no shame in that. There's no shame in talking to an animal, in asking them to communicate in return. You do the best you can.

We're at our best when we care enough to try.

Posted by: elismor at March 17, 2005 07:09 AM

Wil, your pets do communicate with you. There's nothing weird or metaphysical about it. They are conscious, knowing beings of love, and they will always try to communicate with you when possible. This is usually body language and little sounds, but you are right when you think they're telling you something. Granted, it may not be something as profound as "I want to live," but telling you they feel good or bad is something they will do.

Thank you for listening to them. You are loved.

Kroeme

Posted by: Kroeme at March 17, 2005 07:19 AM

So sorry that this is happening to you Wil. You and your wife are right to try and see what happens with the medicines for a week, and you are also right that your baby will tell you when it is time to let go. You will just know! Hang in there, and I will continue to keep you, your family, and Felix, in my positive thoughts.

Posted by: Quincey at March 17, 2005 07:24 AM

Wil,
I would probably have done the same: to give him a chance and see how it works out. At least you'll know u tried everything you could for him. A lot of animals such as cats and dogs, have thoughts and emotions everybit as much as humans, maybe they are not as complex as ours, but they have them neverthelees. Im not saying that as a animal lover as such, im saying it based on scientific research.

On a lighter note, I have posted a blog all about St Patricks Day from an Irish perspective. It might take your mind off things (well for a minute or two anyway). Click here for my blog

Posted by: Noel Burke at March 17, 2005 07:36 AM

Hi Wil - I think we communicate with animals more than we realize, with body language and tone. There's nothing silly about talking to Sketch and Felix like that. Even though they may not understand the words, I'm sure they understand the emotion and concern you were projecting. I wish more people believed that these types of bonds and communication existed! Both of your kits are in my thoughts.

Posted by: ignote at March 17, 2005 07:48 AM

Wil, I have to say that pets of any kind are unique. I mean I have two dogs and my best friend has a dog and cat. 2 years ago her mother had to very old pomerianians. It seems that there is a slight domino effect when it comes to close animals. The younger of the two poms got very sick and had cardiac arrest after weeks of sedimentary life. And the older once passed away in his sleep two weeks later. Sometimes animals are really connected. Maybe the two of them are connected. Also, I believe in talking to animals. I talk to my two dogs all the time as if they understand me. So talking to your cats is not a big deal. You are not crazy or anything. It is just something that happens to pet owners. We do not see them as pets anymore, but as one of the family. They can not talk back, but you understand their vocalizations and expressions. It is perfectly fine. Sending mojo to you and the family everyday.

PS-You rocked in CSI. Even my friend who watched CSI on a regular basis says you were great as a crazy guy and did not have a clue it was you until I told her. I even had to do a double take when I saw Walter. Very scary man. Keep doing a great job, you will have an Oscar on your shelf soon.

Posted by: Shauna at March 17, 2005 07:48 AM

Hi Will. I'm a new reader to your weblog. I decided to pay closer attention when I saw your excellent acting work in CSI recently.

I did as you requested and sent some healing thoughts to your household. It's good to see some clarity has come from it.

As I was reading through this post I was able to tune in and get a clear sense of what Felix wanted. I'm very happy you came to the same conclusion. I also have another tidbit from Felix if you'd like it. He is processing the emotions of the youngest child and the mother. It seems to be unresolved grief, anger and frustration (resentment) involving the son's father. So he is being his little animal healer hero self right now. And he is totally grateful to be heard and supported.
He's showing me three things that would help besides what you have planned. He wants to be next to "green", he wants to be held in your arms outside next to a big healthy tree, and he wants his favourite snack. (It looks like some whitish substance in a small bowl - thicker than milk - or so it seems to me) and again he looks to be outside.

Posted by: Sky at March 17, 2005 08:03 AM

Hi Will. I'm a new reader to your weblog. I decided to pay closer attention when I saw your excellent acting work in CSI recently.

I did as you requested and sent some healing thoughts to your household. It's good to see some clarity has come from it.

As I was reading through this post I was able to tune in and get a clear sense of what Felix wanted. I'm very happy you came to the same conclusion. I also have another tidbit from Felix if you'd like it. He is processing the emotions of the youngest child and the mother. It seems to be unresolved grief, anger and frustration (resentment) involving the son's father. So he is being his little animal healer hero self right now. And he is totally grateful to be heard and supported.
He's showing me three things that would help besides what you have planned. He wants to be next to "green", he wants to be held in your arms outside next to a big healthy tree, and he wants his favourite snack. (It looks like some whitish substance in a small bowl - thicker than milk - or so it seems to me) and again he looks to be outside.

Posted by: Sky at March 17, 2005 08:04 AM

If it helps, my husband and I fed our sick kitty through a tube in his throat for several months before he was finally ready to go. He was perfectly fine with it and after freaking out over having him look like a science fair project (not to mention the unholy gurgling), we all did okay. :)

But I never make a decision about putting an animal to sleep until I talk to Linda Thomas at http://www.ispeakanimal.com/. She's the best remedy for that awful confusion that I've found and is a genuinely soothing presence.

My thoughts are with you all.

Posted by: starlet2367 at March 17, 2005 08:08 AM

Wil
I hope your cat gets better. I think that you will know what to do when the time comes (with input from said kitty of course). wether to give up the ship or to batten down hatches and ride out the storm.
includeing the cat in this choice is not crazy! i think its the sing of a responseable pet owner (or in the case of cats "roommate").

good luck to you and yours from mine and myself! C.

Posted by: carthies at March 17, 2005 08:10 AM

I wish the best for Felix, and I think you are taking the best course of action.

Don't feel weird about talking and listening to your cat. Some people talk to their plants. A cat has got to be at least twice as smart as a plant. At least our cat is. He makes it very clear to us when he wants something. Although our cat may be a bit of an anomaly since he can speak English.

Posted by: Alan at March 17, 2005 08:12 AM

Hey Wil, I talk to my Unix servers all the time and it works the same way... ;)

If it works for machines, one can expect that it would work much better on mammals.

Posted by: bgallant at March 17, 2005 08:12 AM

Continued mojo for both Sketch and Felix, as well as some for you and Anne as well. I wish you guys nothing but the best of luck. Hope both of your kitties pull through!

Posted by: Eric in PA at March 17, 2005 08:21 AM

Dogs have been shown to learn multiple languages (show dogs raised in one country knowing only the language they were trained in having to relearn commands in a second language). Dogs and cats do have obvious emotional responses to people.

It is not a far stretch to say that you know your cats' moods and how they are feeling based on their outward behavior displays. They certainly display empathetic behavior, when you are say, ill, for example (anyone whose ever had a cat that would not leave their side when ill can attest to that).

I will add to those telling you that you will indeed know when it's time to help them from this existence. That you and your wife are watching for it will make it easier for you to know when it comes. Both of you are working to not hang on out of the wish to keep them around.

I had a fine companion, a huge orange tabby named Cyr, who spent more than 19 years with me. As he aged it became apparent he was failing (he had lost a tremendous amount of weight and could no longer jump to height), but he was still happily being a cat, if a shadow of his former self, until one day he just didn't stand up. He was simply done, but could not find the door out, so to speak on his own.

So he laid in my lap overnight until we could take him in. When it becomes truly time, you will have no problems, other than the sadness due to their passing, taking the appropriate step because you will know clearly that it is the right step.

Trust your heart, Wil. It won't steer you wrong.

Posted by: rougewench at March 17, 2005 08:26 AM

It's true that different cats will respond differently to treatment, and I can't speak to some of the vitamins and supplements your vet is suggesting (I'm sure they're all good), but I know, first hand, that daily Sub-Q fluids can make a HUGE difference in the quality and duration of the cat's life. The thing is, when the kidneys aren't functioning properly, they're not ridding the body of toxins well enough, and that will make your cat feel really crummy. Sub-Q fluids help flush those toxins out and consequently the cat feels much better and for a time -like I said in another post, sometimes up to 3 years or so- the cat actually is healthier. The blood tests will reflect that as well. It's definitely worth giving daily sub-q fluids a try. And I don't think there's anything odd about your talking to your cats the way that you do. It's probably the most normal thing you've ever written ;)

Posted by: SpaceCadette at March 17, 2005 08:26 AM

It IS NOT stupid to talk to your cats. :-)

Sometimes when you need to talk to someone, and there are no humans around, your pets always seem to know how to help. They always seem to know that you need to talk, and they will appear to listen, even though you KNOW they can't understand you. If you love them, and treat them as well as you know how, they do the same for you. This is not anthropomorphizing the animals, that's just the behavior of all social animals (except some humans). Your family (animals included) form a social unit, and the cats know when you pay attention to them, and WILL let you know, one way or another, exactly what they need from you.

Now, it does seem to work with 'puters too, for no real sensible reason, but that's just how it is with us biologicals. :-)

Sending some kitty mojo your way.

Posted by: gozo at March 17, 2005 08:26 AM

It's true that different cats will respond differently to treatment, and I can't speak to some of the vitamins and supplements your vet is suggesting (I'm sure they're all good), but I know, first hand, that daily Sub-Q fluids can make a HUGE difference in the quality and duration of the cat's life. The thing is, when the kidneys aren't functioning properly, they're not ridding the body of toxins well enough, and that will make your cat feel really crummy. Sub-Q fluids help flush those toxins out and consequently the cat feels much better and for a time -like I said in another post, sometimes up to 3 years or so- the cat actually is healthier. The blood tests will reflect that as well. It's definitely worth giving daily sub-q fluids a try. And I don't think there's anything odd about your talking to your cats the way that you do. It's probably the most normal thing you've ever written ;)

Posted by: SpaceCadette at March 17, 2005 08:29 AM

Never doubt for a moment that you communicated with your kitties, or that they communicated with you. I hope the treatments work for him. Lots of Kitty Mojo.

~Cheal

Posted by: Cheal at March 17, 2005 08:30 AM

You don't sound lame or nonsensical at all, Wil. We just wen through this with our kitty a few weeks ago and reading your post brings it all back. We went through the same thing - try one last ditch effort at treatment or let Sunny go. Were we trying to treat him for him or for us? We decided to try the last ditch effort for a few days and see if it did anything. Because if it could have pulled him through, and we didn't try it, I'd always wonder. As it turned out, it looked hopeful at first and he seemed better and then he took a turn for the worse. And he seemed so sick and unhappy we opted to put him to sleep. The last hour we spent with him assured us it was the right thing since he was obviously suffering by that point.

It's never easy - but it's good to know you did everything you could within reason to save him. And I'm sure he doesn't want to leave you any more than you want him to leave. You will all be in my thoughts and I hope both Sketch and Felix will have a lot more quality time with you guys.

Posted by: Maggie at March 17, 2005 08:33 AM

I think I'll go pet my kitty now. And we'll both send our good kitty mojo your way.

Posted by: Almost Lucid (Brad) at March 17, 2005 08:35 AM

It IS NOT stupid to talk to your cats. :-)

Sometimes when you need to talk to someone, and there are no humans around, your pets always seem to know how to help. They always seem to know that you need to talk, and they will appear to listen, even though you KNOW they can't understand you. If you love them, and treat them as well as you know how, they do the same for you. This is not anthropomorphizing the animals, that's just the behavior of all social animals (except some humans). Your family (animals included) form a social unit, and the cats know when you pay attention to them, and WILL let you know, one way or another, exactly what they need from you.

Now, it does seem to work with 'puters too, for no real sensible reason, but that's just how it is with us biologicals. :-)

Sending some kitty mojo your way.

Posted by: gozo at March 17, 2005 08:54 AM

Ooops, sorry about the duplicate. I got an error...

Posted by: gozo at March 17, 2005 08:56 AM

it is not stupid at all to talk to you animals. maybe you're talking to them, to god, or to yourself, it doesn't matter. cats are intelligent animals, and it's not outside the realm of possibility that you can communicate with them, in some way.

Posted by: Loreleilee at March 17, 2005 09:03 AM

Wil, the unusual thing is that we deny these connections exist.

Enlightenment is the illumination of connections that were previously dark to you, they were always there.

My cat is into $1500 of treatment and he was a stray to us until 2 months ago, now he is ours. He seems to prefer us and the new lifetstyle, so we continue to work with him.

We spent $12,000 on our dog and she told us when it was too much.

It is a connection thing only, follow that to the right outcome.

Nice job on CSI BTW

Posted by: Senior at March 17, 2005 09:04 AM

Never regret the efforts you make on behalf of your pets. Nine years ago the hubby and I went through a similar ordeal with our dog; she was our first pet and truly a part of our family. She contracted cancer when she was just nine years old; we spent a bundle of money (that we couldn't really spare) on surgery, chemotherapy, and blood transfusions, with no guarantee of any long-term success. There were times during the process when I questioned the wisdom of our decision to put our poor baby through weeks of treatments. My husband said one thing that made it all ok for me, though: There will always be more money; there will never be another Tasha. He was right, of course; there would be other dogs, and we would rebound from the finances, but as long as we could safely and comfortably (for her) prolong her life, it was worth every penny.

As others have said, your kitties will let you know when it's time. But knowing you have done what you could in the meantime is worth any efforts.

Posted by: Red Queen at March 17, 2005 09:10 AM

Wil, you're not crazy or stupid. Like everyone else has said, animals respond to our tone and inflection, as well as our body language. I also suspect they understand a lot more of the actual words than they let on.

I had a cat named "Putter" (named for his unique putt-putt pull) who spoke. He could say yes, no, now, and Mommy. When I spoke to him, he responded to tell me what he needed or wanted. I adored that cat so much. I suspect our closeness was because his cat-momma abandoned him as a kitten and I took him in and bottle-fed him and cuddled him until he was big enough to eat on his own.

He went feral a few years ago after we moved up to the mountains and every so often, I look out at the hills and hope he's happy.

We've had cats in my family going back as long as I can remember and they've all held special places in our hearts. My mom's kitties (Gizmo and Rags) were litter mates and often roamed all over the neighborhood. The last time Gizzy came home was because he was sick and in renal failure. He curled up with my mom and went to sleep, never to wake up. My mom was still heartbroken over Gizzy's death when Rags appeared from nowhere and curled up with her, purring.

Our pets may not be blood, they aren't even our species, but they are family just the same. They "get" us on a level that defies science and logic. And if you listen, you can "get" them too.

Mojo for you and the family, including Sketch and Felix.

~Gem~

Posted by: GeminiLove at March 17, 2005 09:10 AM

Wil, It's not strange to talk to your cats. Not at all. You would be surprised just how much cats understand. I know, we talk to our cats too. Cats do communicate back to us as well. If you pay attention, you can tell. I agree that both Sketch and Felix were telling you that they want to live. I agree with Anne, give it a week or so, and see how it goes. Your cats will tell you when it's time. Hugs to you and Anne, and Felix and Sketch too. You are all in our thoughts and prayers!

Posted by: Sue R at March 17, 2005 09:18 AM

It's not crazy to talk to your pets, and I know exactly what you're going through. 1 of our guinea pigs stopped eating and needed to be force fed for a month, which is apparently unheard of - most owners have the Talk with the vet, and that's it. However, after a month, with no real improvement besides weight gain, my wife and I had our Talk, and then went and petted him, and then called the vet to schedule the Appointment.

Got back to the run, and he got up, walked over to the food that we had put around, and ate every bit of it, and didn't stop for 3 days, where he returned to normal habits.

They know, man...

Posted by: Wich at March 17, 2005 09:19 AM

Sending lots of mojo for you and the furkids!

p.s. My Shadow Kitty is another one who practically speaks English. They understand what you are telling them, trust me on that.

Posted by: lomara at March 17, 2005 09:27 AM

Bah. I tried to comment and got an error. The gist of it was: I'm still keeping Felix and Anne and the rest of your family in my thoughts. I went through a similar situation with my beloved dog, and she's better now. Good luck.

Posted by: Lilitu at March 17, 2005 09:40 AM

Hi Wil, my first time posting.

I think it's brave to surrender your logic to faith in Something Else. You will be rewarded (even if just comforted) for stepping outside your "cold rational" inclinations. And its obvious that both Sketch and Felix appreciated the loving attention. I'm praying for you and your household, and I encourage you to focus on being grateful for the time you have been given with them...this attitude will become increasingly important as mortality looms larger.
P.S. good job on CSI. Tom

Posted by: Tomasi at March 17, 2005 09:49 AM

No particular need to surrender your logic just yet -- cats and dogs have been selectively bred for several thousand years to successfully coexist with human beings. It is pretty unlikely that in this time, considering the physical ways they have adapted, they would not also develop some level of comprehension of our feeble attempts to communicate. I'm certain they don't understand our words, but don't underestimate what they do get. They're working with the tools they have, and it's worked for a long time now.

Posted by: Halfjack at March 17, 2005 10:09 AM

It's not stupid or insane at all to talk to your pets this way. We actually switched vets because the one nearest to us didn't care at all about the animal or us. Our new vet talks to the animals and understands how much they mean to us. It's difficult to explain how they will let you know, but you'll know. Each animal has a personality, and I believe a soul, and if you think back you'll know how they speak to you. Just like a baby, they let you know if they are hungry or cold or want to be held.

Enjoy every day with your kitties and hold onto them, talk to them about the good times you had together and tell them how much you love them. They do understand and it's not crazy. When it's time to let go, you'll know.

Posted by: crouton at March 17, 2005 10:24 AM

Hang in there... and it is not silly at all. Not to go pushin' things, but in reading with what you are going through, some dots got connected... There is a film at the Laemmle One Colorado in Pasadena called "The Wild Parrots of Telegraph Hill". Rated "G", appropriate for the whole family, and has a 97% approval rating on Rotten Tomatoes.

It is a documentary about a just-barely-not homeless man in San Francisco who takes care of a wild flock of parrots. But the whole film deals with this concept of anthropomorphizing and the answers he comes up with. They have a website at http://www.wildparrotsfilm.com and you can download the trailer. The joyful catharsis is unlike any I've experienced. And this issue of animal consciousness and understanding is handed so beautifully... I can't describe it, but your world will be better. Go see the trailer. Go see the movie. You're not crazy for acknowledging the truth that your cats are answering your questions.

Posted by: eyduck at March 17, 2005 10:55 AM

Wil/Anne,

I hope your little ones feel better and pull through all of this. My wife and I have two cats and two dogs and while our situation is not exactly the same, I thought I would share a story of my own.

We found out this past December that our youngest cat, Amos, has a heart disease that can either kill or cut his life span in half. Amos would sleep in strange places and appeared to be cold more often than usual. The specialist said it might have been low circulation because of the heart disease.

We also saw how the other animals reacted to Amos and their body language was a good indicator that there was a problem as well. He has been to a specialist three times now, each time having expensive tests run, as well as having his little side shaved in order to conduct the tests.

The point is that animals WILL let you know what they want and how you can help them. I am glad to say that Amos should be okay but will have to be on medication for the rest of his life. We feed him 1/4 of a pill in the morning and 1/4 at night.

I hope this story ends well for you and your family and for your little ones who unknowingly bring joy to us every single day they are with us.

Amos and I are pulling for you Felix!

Posted by: ~Brian~ at March 17, 2005 11:26 AM

I don't know if this story will help, but I submit it just in case.

My husband had kidney disease a year ago. It hit him just about a year after we had to put down our twenty year old cat Blackstone because of his own case of kidney disease.

We did just about everything you have done for our cat. He was a game fellow and patient with the hydrations, shots, etc. Toward the end he couldn't groom himself at all, so he also put up with baths, never a favorite with him.

When he had to be carried to the litter box, we decided to act. It was awful but necessary and Blackstone cooperated with the vet as if he knew what was happening.

When my husband was at his sickest, he said, "Now that I've had kidney disease myself, I realize we waited way too long to help Blackstone. If I knew then what I know now about how this feels, I would have acted sooner."

Jim recovered completely, but he was pretty damned sick for awhile, and he could only reflect on how bad the cat must have felt too.

Just a data point. Our thoughts are with you all, fur people and regular people both.

Posted by: pyork at March 17, 2005 11:28 AM

It totally makes sense to talk to your pets like that. They understand more than given credit for and soak up our feelings like a sponge. I've had that talk with 2 pets now...and we knew when they were just done with it all. We spent several hundred dollars a month for a year keeping the cat alive because she was not ready to go, and I cooked meals for the dog for 6 weeks because he wasn't ready, and he couldn't stomach anything other than hamburger & rice. With both of them, I wondered how I would KNOW...when it was time I just knew (well, with the cat one huge clue was the vet trying not to cry, but we suspectd on the way in that she wasn't coming home...)

Fight for your kitties until they tell you to stop. The fact that you're willing to sit there and have conversations with them is a pretty good indicator that you'll pay attention when they talk back with actually saying anything...

Posted by: Thumper at March 17, 2005 11:45 AM

I really feel you on this issue. When my dog, Schatze was sick, I think I talked to her for two days straight. I was so scared and confused about what was happening to her, but even though she was sick, she could tell I was sad and tried to comfort me.

Your kitty seems to be feeling your love and if he's acting happy, by all means,listen to him =)

I'd just like to add that there is an RSS feed on LJ that's been updating your site there: http://www.livejournal.com/users/wilwheaton/ It's been getting comments.

Posted by: Belinda.Short at March 17, 2005 12:16 PM

Nothing you said sounds stupid at all... don't worry about that. I hate to use this example as an illustration, but I feel that life on Earth is more Borg-like than most people realize... meaning everything is connected to a central "hive" (be it God, Cosmic, or whatever other name you might want to use) Animals have a closer connection to that central nervous system than we do & although they do not have a Human Voice means of communication, they can still communicate and understand. We just need to open our minds to their style of communication, which it sounds like you are doing.

Posted by: jadeddo at March 17, 2005 12:27 PM

Dear Wil,

My cats and I wanted to let you know that our mojo has been sent. We hope that you and your friends are able to use it.

I'm not a vet, so I have no great physical advice for you or your cats. But I think that as long as you do whatever you do knowing that you did all that you could do and always had the best interest of the kitty in mind, then whatever happens, you'll always know that you did everything you could, and all in the best interest of the kitty.

In the meantime, take lots of video/pictures and exchange lots of stories and maybe paint a picture for him or do something else artistic (that maybe only you and Anne and the boys and other non-human family members know about) that you think would be special for him.

(In other words, sharing stuff with us posse-people on WWDN is great, but you should actively be keeping things for just you and your family, you know? Recall the deer in Stand By Me.)

Best of wishes with everything for you, Anne, the boys, and all the critters.

IanMcKellen

Posted by: IanMcKellen at March 17, 2005 12:39 PM

happy st patricks day.. and I hope the best for your furkid Felix. I know that when you love your cats you'll do whatever it takes within your means to keep the animal out of pain and as healthy as can be. Thanks from one cat lover to another for giving your friend another chance.. He'll tell you for certain when he's ready to go.. if he really is.

Posted by: smeeeko at March 17, 2005 12:59 PM

Wishing you and your family the best.

Posted by: AT at March 17, 2005 01:05 PM

Not in the least little bit insane, Wil. You should be thankful that your furbabies made the time to answer you. Some cats ignore their people, ya know.

You and yours are still very much with us, sweetie.

Posted by: Cookie at March 17, 2005 01:18 PM

I've been going through, (and doing), the same thing and my heart goes out to all of you.

Posted by: Livia99 at March 17, 2005 01:51 PM

Okay, I realize how insane this sounds. Normally, I'm a pretty cold and rational person, and I would scoff at the idea of talking to my cat like he's a person. I know, I know. It's lame, right? But I don't think it's much different than praying, or asking the universe for help, or keeping someone in your thoughts, or anything like that. It's just . . . it's just putting a little bit of hope (or faith, or whatever) into Something Else. I'd never let it take the place of things like medication, trips to the doctor, or good solid science . . . but we humans have all these constructs in our minds, and sometimes we do some pretty silly things to stay comfortable. At times like this, I don't care if I'm anthropomorphizing my pets. If I can assign some human qualities to their body language or behavior and feel a little closer to them, so be it.

Yeah, I suppose it sounds crazy, but here's the thing - I wouldn't care if I was anthropomorphizing the cat either, given the same circumstances. I firmly believe that the people or animals we love "get" that we love them, whether or not they can understand the words. If nothing else, that's enough reason (more than enough reason, I'd say) to have had The Talk with Felix.

And of course it's also true that saying those words is just as often for the person SAYING them as much as it is for the person (or pet, in this case) the words are being said TO.

Posted by: hess42 at March 17, 2005 02:44 PM

What's so crazy about talking to our pets? Especially to get their input on what's happening to them. Pets have feelings and opinions just like people do. They let us know when they like us or are angry with us; they let us know when they like the food we give them, or not; they let us know where "their" spot in the house is; they let us know that they understand when we're feeling bad. I had a dog that would come and stay by my side whenever I felt sick. One day, soon after we brought my now four-year-old son home from the hospital, we couldn't find Fletch (the dog) anywhere in the house. We looked in Mac's (my son's) room, and Fletch was lying down in front of his crib, like he was guarding and protecting his new little brother. We've since had to put Fletch down, and that is one of my favorite memories of him. My point is, pets are people, too. There's nothing wrong with, or crazy about, finding out what they want to do regarding their own health.

Sending lots of mojo for the whole Wheaton clan, two-legged and four-legged members alike.

Posted by: sonjaag at March 17, 2005 03:19 PM

Ya know, I'm not so sure it's crazy. I'm not some cosmic I can talk to animals type, but I've seen animals communicate quite effectively.

I remember one time about 12 years ago when I was living with a neat freak chick. I'd opened the glass doors on the stereo cabinet put on a tape or something and walked back to the couch to relax.

A little bit later the cat comes in and rubs his neck briefly on the side of the open glass door on the stereo cabinet, looks at me, rubs again, and looks back at me. I was like wtf? He did it again. I said, "Did I slack and leave the door open?" He repeated his rub/look move. I got up and closed the door and he gleefully trotted over to the gas furnace on the wall. More rub/look moves. I got the message much sooner this time. "A bit cold, huh?" and kicked on the thermostat. There was the woof! of the gas lighting and the furnace kicked on. He fluttered down like a leaf falling from a tree in front of the heater, curled up and relaxed with an undeniable expression of happiness.

Everyone has seen the I want to go out routine at the door or the I'm hungry routine by the food bowl, but I've never been told to neaten up and kick on some heat before then.

I doubt your cats understood a word you said. But I'm sure they got the tone. And their more energetic response a short time later gave you the answer you needed. It was too soon to give up.

May good fortune shine upon their health.

Posted by: mnb at March 17, 2005 03:26 PM

I think thats the sweetest thing Ive read in a long time. Theres nothing wrong with talking to your pets and letting them know you love them. They give all of us unconditional love and are great at listening without being...... too judgmental, so why not give the love back? If anything, Im sure your attention is giving him more comfort than you realize. Im still sending my positive thoughts. I hope things all work out for the best.
-Tara

Posted by: Kenobismom at March 17, 2005 04:10 PM

Wil:

I wanted to leave a comment here along with everyone else. I wanted you to know that me and my kitty are pulling for you and your kitties. I am sending support for all of you in your family. I hope he pulls through okay.

Beth

Posted by: Beth Rose Pizana at March 17, 2005 04:50 PM

I've only been reading your blog for about a week now, but I'm sitting here bawling my eyes out over your situation... I've been through the same thing and just thinking about it... About two years ago, we decided to get a second cat, so we adopted one. She got sick within four months and after spending about $1500 on her, she died while we were deciding if we should take her back to the vet that night...I think she knew we were having too hard a time making the decision ourselves. A few months later, we decided to try again, adopting from a shelter again. Six months later she was at the vet, we were spending another $1000, and we thought back to Sweetie, and we decided to let her go without further pain. I can honestly say those were the two of the hardest days of my life. A year later, we tried again, adopting two sisters...who are as healthy as ever. So, you have CatMojo x 5 (current three plus two in Kitty Heaven) coming your way...

Posted by: jen at March 17, 2005 05:29 PM

I'm sorry about Skethc, I've been there before and I completely understand the not wanting to let go but at the same time not wanting to hurt them. You'll know when the right time comes, till then, have fun!

Posted by: marg85 at March 17, 2005 05:31 PM

My boyfriend and I talk to our cats and sometimes the cats will talk back. So what you're doing is pretty normal.

Anyway, sending out some continuing warm and fuzzy and fighting and loving mojo for Felix and his supporters.

From
Crissie and Panda the cat.

Posted by: Crissie at March 17, 2005 05:39 PM

I haven't read what everyone else has said, but I have a feeling I'm just going to be repeating....

I've been a registered veterinary technician for 11 yrs now, and it's true, well-loved pets always tell you when they are ready. I recently had to euthanize my cat I had had for over 10 yrs. We (the cat and I) spent the entire weekend talking, remembering, snuggling. She was ready, and I was comforted by it. Yes, it was still one of the hardest things I've ever done, but *knowing* that she was ready and ok with it helped an amazing amount. When I did put her down that Monday she was at peace, and so was I

Posted by: hhrvt at March 17, 2005 05:41 PM

((Wil)) ((Felix)) ((Anne))

You guys are doing the right thing.

Wish I could say something else to make it better.

I am quite sure that he can tell that you care about him, though, and isn't that what it's all about?

Pet him extra once for me. :)

Jenga

Posted by: jenga at March 17, 2005 05:55 PM

wil,

Stop apologizing.. stop saying you know how odd it sounds..stop worrying about what anyone else thinks.
You know... you feel.. you sense.. that they understand and can communicate in whatever way they can find with you. That is an amazing thing.. and to heck with the people that would not understand or be critical, because this is not about them.. this is about your family... your cats... and the lives of all involved. I think it is wonderful that you feel that connection.. and are using it to do whats right for them.

My thoughts are with your family right now.. I hope it works out the way it is meant too and you have all the time with both of your cats that you should.

Neph

Posted by: NephraTari at March 17, 2005 06:05 PM

Wil & Anne,

From one pet owner and animal lover to another, you have NOTHING to be ashamed of. I think most of us who have a heart, have had THE TALK with our lil buddies. Our lil buddies know who loves them and they can sense how you feel... they can sense when your mad, sad, excited, happy or concerned about them. I believe Felix and Sketch knew you were upset and came to check on you to say, "Hey Wil, I'm hanging in there." Hope all is well and best wishes to everyone in the Wheaton family.

Rob

Posted by: RobAP at March 17, 2005 06:15 PM

Hey Wil, Too funny that almost every single person who wrote here told you that it is not insane at all to talk to your pets and that they do it too. I have serious whole conversations (one sided of course) with my dog all the time (clearly I spend far too much time by myself) and I know he understands every word I'm saying. When he looks at me with those deep brown eyes I can feel his understanding. Okay, who sounds crazy now?? LOL Anyway, your story about Sketch letting you know that he was going to be okay and now Felix acting the same is very heartwarming and thanks so much for sharing. Sending lots of get well wishes and hugs to Felix and my thoughts and prayers will be with you and your family. And once again, Riley sends his wishes too.
Beverly

Posted by: Beverly Grey at March 17, 2005 06:22 PM

Wil,

Sorry to hear about your cats. I know what your going thru is though but listening to your cats is the right thing to do. I personaly dont think it sounds crazy. Just that your more open minded then some.

Oh well, thats my two cents.

Later,

Erik

Posted by: moonprince1701 at March 17, 2005 06:28 PM

i understand what you all are going through. i had 10 cats in my life time all but maybe 2 were litter mates. i one year had 6 cats die almost a month apart. it never gets easier lemme tell ya, but i can tell you that as hard as it is im glad they arent in pain any more. BTW talkin to yer cat isnt dumb wil, i think every one does it to thier pets.

Posted by: GothGeek at March 17, 2005 06:41 PM

Oh, Wil...I know what you're going through. But you're NOT nuts. I did the same thing with my 14 year-old bobtailed tabby, Noodle (a.k.a. "Nub"). We had "the talk," but I knew it wasn't his time yet. I did the pacing the floor, "when will I KNOW?" deal for several weeks, and then one day, I came home and he was sitting at the bottom of the staircase (he could barely make it from A to B at that point, and to this day I have no CLUE how he walked all the way downstairs). I knew he was telling me he was ready, but first, he wanted to go outside for awhile and nibble on some grass. We both knew it'd be his last time. I made a bed on the floor and slept next to him all night. I thought we'd get in early, but the vet was in surgery and we couldn't get an appointment till noon. I called in to work, huddled up next to my boy, and we spent our last few hours together. At one point, I noticed he was looking up at the window, so I opened the blinds, and it was raining. Go figure. He kept focusing on the window, so I opened it and he picked his sweet little head up and sniffed the air so happily. So I moved some boxes around and made him a new bed by the window. He was so weak, but delighted to sniff the fresh air and look around at the raindrops and the birdies. At one point I was weeping so hard I left him alone, so he could have some "time to himself." I know it sounds crazy, but I KNEW that's what he wanted (and not me sobbing at his side). I took a picture of him at that moment, a silhouette of him sitting on the windowsill. That's what I like to remember. Him being happy. A few hours later, he was gone. On his terms. Bottom line, you'll know. Even if it's not so clear, you'll feel it. And it'll be the right thing to do at the right time. I can also guarantee that Nub will be right there waiting for Felix and Sketch with open paddies! New buds for his posse. And how cool is that? :)
Sending you my best wishes...

Posted by: Halo Askew at March 17, 2005 08:19 PM

Wil, you don't sound stupid at all. That's my opinion, and I read your latest post to Pamela, and that's her opinion, too. She says that cats definitely understand more than you'd think. Star and Maui understand a lot of what she says, for instance. They'll even come visit Pamela when she's not feeling well, making sure she's okay and helping comfort her. And I know Maui gets concerned when I stay in bed too late; he comes in and meows at me, as if to remind me, "Time to get up!"

Star just came over and sat on my lap. I think she wants to send more kittymojo to Felix and Sketch. She is literally nuzzling my hand as I type. So consider more kittymojo on its way. (Good girl, Star!)

Posted by: Erbo at March 17, 2005 08:29 PM

Wil, talking to your pets is not silly. The capacity to feel and share love in the multitude of ways that we do is the most wonderful, crazy thing about being human. Just because your cats can't speak back to you in English is no reason to not share as much love as you can with them in the kind of language that you know.

Best wishes for you all!

lisa

Posted by: satsumabug at March 17, 2005 09:00 PM

As has been said numerous times before this, my "day late" comment, you're not crazy, or lame, or insane, or whatever.

Animals do speak to their loved ones, Wil. It's just that in order to hear them, you have to listen with your heart, not your ears. You and Anne are good listeners. Keep the faith. Our fur-brats hear and understand every word we say...they just don't give a shit about most of it and the rest they don't pay attention to.

Unless it involves food, going outside, or toys.

At least, that's how it is in *my* house.

Better Late Than Never,
The Goddess of Justice and Vengeance

Posted by: Aylaleia at March 17, 2005 09:51 PM

***HUGS***

I understand exactly what you guys are going through, and yes they do understand us, I have seen it multiple times. I hope they all feel better soon.

Take care,
Odile

Posted by: Odile at March 17, 2005 10:26 PM

Wil,

I've been reading your site for a while now, finally compelled to add a comment.

You got 3 cats, 2 dogs, and 2 humans pulling for Felix from this house.

Just thought I would offer up a couple of tunes for the cat folks out there, (RIAA safe).

http://www.alaska.net/~babyrne/catsongs.zip

Meryn Cadell, Robin Flower & Libby McLaren

One is for when the cats are being good, and the other is for Xmas when you're missing one. Both wonderful tunes.

So happy to read on later post that Felix is doing better.

Posted by: Barry at March 18, 2005 01:05 AM

Wil,

I've been reading your site for a while now, finally compelled to add a comment.

You got 3 cats, 2 dogs, and 2 humans pulling for Felix from this house.

Just thought I would offer up a couple of tunes for the cat folks out there, (RIAA safe).

http://www.alaska.net/~babyrne/catsongs.zip

Meryn Cadell, Robin Flower & Libby McLaren

One is for when the cats are being good, and the other is for Xmas when you're missing one. Both wonderful tunes.

So happy to read on later post that Felix is doing better.

Posted by: Barry at March 18, 2005 01:05 AM

Hey Felix! Here's hoping you feel much much much better! The living world is not ready to give up on you yet. :-D

Wil... I don't even know your cat and even *I'm* talking to him. Wait, no... sending him a "typed" message. You are not insane.

Posted by: Nadia at March 18, 2005 04:01 AM

Hey Wil,

Just wanted to say I am a fellow cat person and I totally understand. My 3 cats are like my kids. If something happened to one of them I would do whatever I could to help them and I would be waiting for them to give me guidance just as you did. So it's not silly. I just wanted to say that Felix & Sketch and the rest of the Wheaton family are in my thoughts and prayers.

Posted by: tlt6677 at March 18, 2005 08:51 AM

I'm so sorry about your kitties Wil. I can tell that you really love them. I just wanted to say its absolutely NOT silly to talk to your animals. Its how we express ourselves to them. Kitty soul touching human soul and vice versa. Obviously, from how your kitties respond to you, it's true. Dont be ashamed, revel in your connection with your animals! And enjoy every moment with them....even those cheesy moments when you tell them how much you love them. They know what you're saying.

Posted by: La Alli at March 18, 2005 10:35 AM

Hey Wil,

I already have said this, but your cats and dogs are very lucky to have you! You are NOT stupid for talking to your pets. That is what gives you comfort. I think about Felix and Sketch and all of you guys everyday. I am praying hard for Felix and Sketch!! I am so sorry that you and your family have been going though so much. I wish I could help out some how. I can pray, and I will for all of you, everyday!! I wish you ALL the very best!

Posted by: JCade at March 18, 2005 11:30 AM

Here's hoping both your guys make a full recovery. Talking to your pets is perfectly normal as far as I'm concerned; beats the hell out of talking to yourself. Take care!

Posted by: warcrygirl at March 18, 2005 03:12 PM

I think that if I lost my cat, it would be a world less startling and inexplicable. It sounds so sappy for me to say this, but I wouldn't know what to do without Kitters (I nicknamed her Catzilla) my cat of the last 14 some odd years. It's a long story, and I apologize in advance for boring you to tears with the details, but I have to share my times of being an owner and a traveler of life with a cat.

Wil, I know what you must have felt when you sat down and had the "Talk" with kitty, cause I've been there too and it's a gut wrenching, bawl your fuckin eyes out, shreak out loud kinda emotion. I don't have any kids but I know that this would be the same if I had to go thru losing one of them.

Kitters is just this little Russian Blue kitty. You'd not know from looking at her that she's a smart as hell little kitty, but she can figure out some stuff that would amaze the best of us.

Around 1992, my friend got married and was moving to Hawaii. She asked me to take over her Apt and lease. Along with this came Kitters because she said that they keep cats and dogs in quarantine for six months to determine if they are infected with something. We both knew that this would be a torture on both owner and pet, so I said that I would be willing to take care of the little thing.

I had no idea that she would become such a part of me and my life. Just a quick background; former US Marine, got out of the service in 1992 after the first Gulf War. Went to college, got a degree, now work in North County San Diego as a Computer Network Tech for a BioTech. Anyway, kitty can be a handful and I have always induldged her, she gets the best food, the rubbing and petting of a Royal Egyptian cat if that is possible and I look forward to seeing her everyday when I get home from work.

Are pets a member of the Family? Yes. Do they have a soul or as scientists say, they just mimic things that they have learned? Well, I know that Kitters has a personality and she knows that I am coming down the hallway outside the condo we share and meets me with a meow and wants to be fed. If anyone says that they have no feelings, no emotions or no soul has never had a cat as a roommate.

Wil, my heart goes out to you and your family during this time. I know that Felix and Sketch will be out of danger soon and that you will enjoy many years together as a family and I wish you well during this time. As they say, cats have nine lives and they always make it thru somehow.

All My Best

Catzilla and GeekBoyMatt

Posted by: geekboymatt at March 18, 2005 07:47 PM

Wil,
As a cat person, I see nothing wrong in your logic that the cats, Sketch and Felix, are telling you something. I believe ALL animals communicate to us in their own special ways.

I know all five of my cats' voices and when they are telling me different things. To me they are my children. I call the boys my sons, and the girl my daughter. (Now do YOU feel so crazy?) I have no children of my own at this time as I'm too young, at least I think so at 22, to have them. However, when I get home I can tell you who out of: Chip, Junior, Reverend, Tiger, or Samantha is calling me. I could even tell you if actually it was none of them and it was my mom's cat, Callie.

I believe that Sketch has told you he's a fighter and will not give up anytime soon. Felix is telling you to give it chance with the meds b/c he's willing to fight to stay with you and yours.

I think you and Anne have made a great choice in getting the medication for Felix. I wish him and Sketch a full recovery and fulfill the rest of their 9 lives.

And cheer up, you know the old saying when one is glum everyone else knows it ... so do it for your boys, Nolan and Ryan, and Felix and Sketch, and most of all Anne. She's gonna need you to be strong for the both of you b/c she's soo close to Felix it seems.

Well, I must get goin.

Posted by: Jenn at March 19, 2005 12:14 AM

The very best of mojo to your kitties and you and your family. When she was ready, my beloved Smokey Cat died in my arms. I hope I get the same chance with my Jonathan and Daisy Cats.

'Heaven will not Heaven ever be, unless my cats (and everyone I care about) are there to welcome me.'

Posted by: Elyssa at March 19, 2005 05:20 AM

Wil, the post was probably made the better by being your raw, shared feelings, left unedited.

I am so very sorry that you have to go through this with both Sketch and Felix. Your writing about this is beautiful and captures the love and affection that so many owners have for their feline family members. Don't be ashamed of that bond, or feel that it's strange.

As for understanding them, that's not odd, either. I have a wonderfully affectionate cat (and rascal) named Charlie, and although we obviously aren't understanding each other's language, he definitely picks up on the emotional tone of my voice, as well as my body language -- as do I, with him.

That is not metaphysical or mystical -- that's probably been proven by a scientist in some lab somewhere, but has been proved practically by millions of pet owners everywhere already.

When I think of them, I will keep your cats and your family in my thoughts, WIl.

Wil, on an entirely unrelated note (and perhaps it's crass of me to ask this here), any idea when you'll be responding to the second slate of questions from Slashdot?

Posted by: Mike at March 19, 2005 07:33 AM

I've started reading your blog to keep up on how Sketch and Felix are doing. I'm pulling for all of you.

Posted by: SpinKitty at March 19, 2005 09:31 PM

Wil, I think in this matter you've got quite a bit more strength than I.

It wasn't not too long ago that my cat, which I had since early childhood, was put to sleep. I had that cat since I was 6 years old, and I was 22 years old when that day came. He lived with us in our house, then when we moved we kept him with grandma, and I visited her (and my kitty) at least once a week.

There's two kickers to this though. When grandma's health necessitated moving her into a nursing home, my father decided that it would be best to put "Checkers" to sleep (he wouldn't allow pets in the new house). He didn't feel that a cat of that age would adjust to new owners, plus he said he had kitty arthritis or something, which I think is BS because my cat showed NO signs of any discomfort. Of any kind. He didn't jump onto couches much anymore, but he was still happily purring and craving attention. But... I really didn't have much say.

So, I had decided that if my father was going to put Checkers to sleep then I should be by his side in the last hour of his life since he was beside mine for almost every hour that mattered.

...But I didn't have the strength to say to my dad, "I want to be there when it's time." And I've never forgiven myself for it.

My father simply walked in the door one day with a floppy disc in his hand. The disc contained a photos of my cat, thankfully not at the vet's office but at home.

I felt like such a damned coward.

Well... I don't know why I'm sharing this since I don't really see how it helps much in your situation. Maybe it's a catharsis thing in telling people who might understand, or maybe it's a misery-loves-company kind of thing. In any case, Wil, if it's absolutely necessary that you've got to let him go, make sure he goes in the arms of his friend. You.

Posted by: XStylus at March 20, 2005 08:05 AM

I'm a little late in posting this, but Wil, you need to know that talking to your animals socializes them and creates an intimacy with them. And yes, Sketch will tell you when he has had enough. My 20-year old cat, Osgood, let me know in an unmistakeable way last September that it was time to let him go. He, too, had failing kidneys and experienced the same thing Sketch is going through now. He lived for 5 years after diagnosis, then one day, AFTER I ASKED HIM, he went into the kitchen in the corner and did something totally out of character, letting me know it was time. It helped immensely. Without that little act of his, I am sure I would be still self-flagellating--don't worry. Both of your babies will let you know. BUT, ya gotta ask, ya know?

Posted by: rush at March 21, 2005 12:57 PM

Do our pets understand us? It's so hard to say. Do we understand them? Rarely, I'm sure. It's terribly hard to let go of a pet and it is helpful to have the lines of communication as open as possible.

Personally, I talk to my pets a lot. Ever since I was young I have always lined up my pets to tell them when I'm going away for a few days and what the plan is. Now with a total of seven furries (four dogs, three cats) I've got a lot of 'splaining to do. But I think it makes both me and them feel better. If I had to make a decision for their health I would definitely put the question out for them.

Posted by: CmdrSue at March 21, 2005 10:29 PM