fhqwhgads
I need to get my groove on.
I need to do some secret eating.
I need a theme song.
February 26, 2003
February 16, 2003
if ($TIME==free) then {make_cool_stuff}
Sometimes, free time is a good thing.
Anne is finally home, and I can walk away from the computer for a few hours. Hooray!
February 4, 2003
Who's Watching Our Cats?
According to The Onion, I am.
This is too cool!
I had an audition for John Doe again yesterday . . . but I didn't nail it. I have a call for CSI later this afternoon.
Update: The role, which was about six lines, shoots tomorrow, and I haven't heard anything, so it's not happening. I'm actually sort of glad . . . if I'm going to be on CSI, I'd rather have a bigger role that I can do more cool stuff with. While I was out there, I ran into Scott Grimes, who I've known since childhood, but haven't seen or spoken to in almost a decade. It was great to see him, and we made plans to get our families together for funtimes. So it wasn't a total waste of time and miles on my car. ;)
Busy, busy, busy . . . and you expect me to watch your damn cats? There'd better be Anchor Steam Liberty Ale in the fridge, buddy.
February 3, 2003
It's dot net!
February 1, 2003
We shall never cease
We shall never cease from exploration
And the end of all our exploring
Will be to arrive where we started
And know the place for the first time.
-T. S. Eliot (1888 - 1965)
January 31, 2003
Tokyo Disneyland on one dollar short a day
Ben and Mena Trott are the amazing people who wrote Moveable Type, the blogging software that has allowed me to take what's in my head and share it with the world.
Mena is also one hell of an artist, as illustrated by these pictures from their recent trip to Tokyo Disneyland.
January 27, 2003
January 14, 2003
Hoo boy!
As if keeping this site updated isn't enough work, I keep a journal at Slashdot. I wrote in it just now!
I also just found out that those fabulous babes at The Screen Savers, Morgan and Megan, awarded Nemesis the coveted "B-M-W-N-S-B-W-W-W-I-I" (that's the "Best Movie We'll Never See Because Wil Wheaton Wasn't in It") award.
January 13, 2003
A Very Special Episode . . .
On January 23rd, we are doing a Very Special Episode of the J. Keith vanStraaten Show over at The Comedy Central Workspace!
Unlike most Very Special Episodes, this one will not feature any soft lighting and important lessons on life, nor will it feature any retarded children saving a cat from a tree or putting out a fire.
What makes this Very Special Episode very special is the cost: FREE!
That's right. All you have to do is RSVP, and show up. We'll take care of the rest.
If you've been wanting to see your old pal Uncle Willie live, in person, giving up the funny, now's your chance.
Here's the info:
GUESTS:
Comedy legend Fred Willard!
Comedy Sensation Zack Galifinakis!
Musical Guest Nina Gordon!PLUS!
- Me
- Adam And The Chesters
- 100 smoking monkeys*
WHEN:
January 23rd 8pmWHERE:
Comedy Central Workspace @ The Hudson Theatre
6539 Santa Monica Blvd.
Hollywood, CA 90038RSVP NUMBER:
323.960.5519
I will be wearing The Shirt. Hope to see lots of WWDN readers there!
*(monkeys will only appear in your imagination)
January 7, 2003
Commerce
A quick update on outstanding 8x10 orders:
I just found out that my email client may have eaten a few orders. If you ordered a photo between December 13th and the 23rd, and you haven't gotten anything yet, or heard from me, would you please email me, so I can check my records?
I want to make sure that everyone gets the stuff they ordered.
Those of you who ordered pictures for the doggie shelter in Brooklyn RAWK! Between Tom Tomorrow's site, individual donations, and the $350 I gave them from 8x10 sales, we have raised over $4,000, and it looks like the doggies are going to be just fine. :)
Finally, I have about 10 pictures sitting here from people who placed orders, but never told me what to write on them. If you ordered, and never told me what to write on your picture, please email, too. I'm going to hold on to these unsigned pictures for a few more days, and then I'll sign them to the buyer, and send them off.
December 31, 2002
31.12.02
The first thought in my head this morning was, "man, I have to pee!"
The second thought was, "where the hell did the year go?"
2002 was an amazing year for me. It was a year of discovery and a year of transformation. I am very grateful that I have been able to share this time with all the WWDN readers. You have all been an integral part of this year. Thank you for sharing it with me.
Happy New Year, everyone. Please be safe tonight. See you in 2003.
December 30, 2002
Pimpf
I was reading my pal Tom Tomorrow's weblog this morning, and came across this:
"So Andrew Sullivan spent a week or so rattling the tip jar on his blog and apparently fattened his bank account by some eighty or ninety thousand dollars."And it kind of makes you do a double take, if you're keeping a blog, especially a blog with a substantial readership. Hey, you think, maybe I should start rattling the tip jar. Hell, why shouldn't I try to get paid for my work? (And, to be honest, you think: eighty thousand f**king dollars? Jesus F**king Christ on a crutch!)"
"So what if we take that impulse and channel it in such a way that we can actually make some small specific difference in the world? Something more important than fattening an online yuppie pundit's wallet?
"Specifically: there's a non-profit here in Brooklyn called Hearts & Homes for Homeless Dogs, which, as you might surmise, cares for and finds homes for abandoned and abused dogs. (Brooklynites have probably seen them out finding homes for their charges at Seventh Ave and First Street on the weekends, or at Court and Montague all week long.) If you've been reading this website regularly, you might already be familiar with the story of my own dog, the happy fellow in the photo below, who was abandoned as a puppy with scabies, and is alive today only by the grace of someone who cared enough to take him in and nurse him back to health. So the work they do at Hearts & Homes strikes a personal chord with me.
"Of course, since this is the internet, I'm sure I'll get email from someone saying, why a dog charity, when there are so many other problems in the world? Well, I'm starting with this particular charity--and I hope this is only a beginning--because I support the work they do, and more importantly, because they are facing an emergency situation, and they need help, right now:
'Unforeseeably, the shelter/home where Hearts and Home Inc. has worked from for the past 7 years has recently been sold. And now, they have only 2 short months to find adequate and affordable space—not easy in this economy! The costs of feeding and caring for an average of 21 dogs are staggering enough. But finding the funds to relocate everyone and everything could bankrupt Mel and Roseann, and they and their furry charges could wind up on the street.'"So here's the deal: there are a lot of you out there reading this site, and a dollar probably doesn't mean much to most of you, one way or the other--but if every single one of you were to click here and donate a dollar or two to Hearts & Homes, then together, we could make an enormous, specific difference.
"So come on. Who's with me here?"
If you've read WWDN for a long time, you may remember that Anne Saved Ferris, so I am touched by this situation.
Here's my deal: I will donate the proceeds from the next ten 8x10s I sell. That's $350. So if you've been waiting to buy a photo, maybe now would be a good time to do that, and help out a needy cause at the same time.
Speaking of photos, I have a ton of orders here that I'm filling right now. I'll put a big old batch of them in the mail in the next couple of days.
December 19, 2002
Must. Swim. Faster.
I am currently drowning in Christmas shopping and driving around, and filling 8x10 orders (sent out about 40 yesterday, I hope the lab will have my prints ready tomorrow morning so I can get the rest of the orders out by Saturday.)
However, I have a moment to raise my head above water, draw a breath, and share the following:
1. Saw Two Towers last night. Loved it. Darker and scarier than Fellowship. I'll write up a full review when I have more time . . . in 2004.
2. Just found out that "The First Duty," which I think is one of Wesley's finest episodes (even if he *is* the Narc Of Nova Squadron) is on TNN tonight, at 8PM Eastern.
3. I have been totally overwhelmed with e-mails and comments from people who saw The Screen Savers. Thank you to those of you who took the time to let me know that you liked what I did. I had a blast, and I will go back any time they ask me.
4. I haven't seen Trek X yet, so I can't give it a review here. However, the emails I've gotten from people are pretty much split 50-50, love it and hate it. Based on the box office, I think it's a safe call to assume that the TNG movies really are finished.
I am ready for the "sitting around the fire with friends and family while drinking egg nog" part of Christmas to begin.
Are we there yet?
December 16, 2002
Look ma, I'm on TechTV!
I love that I can sit here in a hotel in San Francisco, scan for an open WAP, and update my website.
Now, if I can just have my damn flying car, the future will finally be here as promised.
So this is just a reminder that I'll be guest hosting Screen Savers on TechTV, tomorrow (Tuesday the 17th). I'm off to enjoy this amazing city with my wife.
UPDATE 12:09 PM 12.17.02: Attention Farkers: I will be wearing The Shirt.
That is all.
December 15, 2002
Bark at the moon
It's Sunday, and that means that it's time for a few links.
The best thing about today? It's just 3 days until Two Towers comes out. I don't know about the rest of you, but I started my countdown to Wednesday (well, midnight Tuesday, really) when the credits for Fellowship of the Ring were about half over. The Chicago Sun Times has a really nifty article about the making of TT, along with a swell synopsis of the story so far.
There's also a very interesting article in Time called "The Business of Star Trek," which may be of interest to WWDN readers.
This made me laugh really, really hard. I wish you would enjoy it.
If you want to see the blue hair, my lawn, and my dog, look here, but only for a few hours. Those pictures really suck up the bwf.
And now a couple of announcements:
I have completely run out of 8x10's (!) and there are about 30 requests that are officially "back ordered." What this means is, on Wednesday, I will pay the "please rush this so my orders can arrive in time for Xmas" fees at the lab, and fill those orders by Wednesday night. Back orders will go out by the end of the week, and should arrive in time for Christmas. This has been a great learning experience for me, and when my books are available, the process of filling those orders will be very easy. GNUCash is a GREAT tool for handling the bookkeeping involved with this silly little operation I've got going here. :)
Tomorrow, Anne and I are heading up to San Francisco, because I'm hosting The Screen Savers on TechTV on Tuesday. Guess what? I get to interview one of my biggest heroes, Michio Kaku, author of "Hyperspace," and "Visions," two books which profoundly changed the way I view the universe around us.
Happy Festivus, everyone.
December 8, 2002
May The Force be with you.
Just found out that this interview I did with The Force Dot Net is up!
Thanks to everyone, including Chris (who did the interview), for letting me know about it. :)
December 5, 2002
Regret
Thought For Today:
" Regret is the worst of human emotions. There is no going back with regret. There is no future with regret. Regret is not something I live with. If there is something I wished I hadn't done, I don't do it anymore or I forgive myself and try better.My life is my statement and I try to be true to myself and thusly to other people. Whatever my failings are, they are human and I try to perfect it each day. "
-William Fucking Shatner, at Slashdot
November 30, 2002
Attention Holiday Shoppers!
I've done some work on the store, redesigning all the images to be much higher resolution.
I've also added several new products, including thongs for the ladies, perfect for throwing at me while I'm on stage.
If you're interested in an autographed picture, check out this page, but act fast. I only have a handful of 8x10's left.
Happy shopping, everyone.
November 29, 2002
Fun with LEGOs
I submitted this story, which I first saw on Fark, to Slashdot, but since none of my stories ever make it, I'm submitting it here, where I have an "in" with the webmaster:
"A self-proclaimed "dork" has built one of the best models of Enterprise D I have ever seen (and I think I speak with some authority)...entirely out of LEGOs.
I can see my house from here!"
UPDATE: Holy crap! It got accepted! It got accepted! I submitted a story to Slashdot, and it got accepted!!
/geekout
November 27, 2002
Iowa. Iowa. Iowa.
Last night, as I was getting ready to hop into bed, I did one last check of the email, to see if there had been any update from Bob in Iowa about his baby girl.
There was.
Read on...
Date: Tue Nov 26, 2002 20:43:06 US/PacificSubject: Boodlie-Face update from Bob
Wil,
I absolutely do not know how to thank you enough. At this very moment,
despite what you are reading, I am at a loss for words. Forgive me if this message is more rambling and incoherent than my last email, but I'm
basically just typing this as it slowly comes to me.I am sorry for not responding to you until now, but I just got back from the hospital. First thing I did when I booted up my computer was to go to your site. I was astounded, and shocked, and pleased, and happy, and overjoyed that you took the time to a) post my message, and b) send me the mojo. But as astounded, shocked, pleased... is there a word that encompasses all five of those emotions?... as I was at that, I was completely blown away by the huge, and wonderfully loving, responses that it drew.
I read each and every one of them. I felt, in fact I *knew*, that I had to. I am sitting here, a grown man with a wife and child and ALL MAN BABY AND DON'T YOU FORGET IT!!!, and I am crying. Not a sobbing, heaving, snot-running-from-my-nose, I've-lost-all-sense-of-composure crying. Rather, it is a joyous, thankful, I-cannot-believe-how-incredible-complete-strangers-can-be-in-times-of-need, I-want-to-hug-the-whole-freakin'-world-and-I-just-can't-hold-it-in kind of crying. To you, Uncle Willie, and to all who sent the love, prayers, and mojo to my little Boodlie-Face, I just want to tell you: you made a grown man cry, and in the words of The Martha, "it's a good thing".
I have barely slept since I wrote that last email to you. We had to get up at an ungodly hour to get Her Royal Highness to the hospital on time, which we did *to the minute*, I kid you not. After she went in for the operation, my beautiful wife, my wonderful mother, and I were in the Day Of Operation Waiting Room. And this, well, this is the kicker: all three of us felt, at various times, a little dizzy for no good apparent reason. And not necessarily in a bad way, either. Well, not so much dizzy, but more like light-headed. For no reason, well, no reason that we could think of: remember, I had no idea Uncle Wil had posted my email or that I was, at that time, receiving some MAJOR positive energy from ALL OVER THE WORLD. And, despite my trepidation... and that is an understatement... before the surgery, I was much calmer and my mind much less troubled when the operation was actually happening. I wouldn't lie or exaggerate about this: it would besmirch the incredible outpouring of awesome good-will that Katie, my wife, my mother, and I received.
Bottom-line it, Bob! Okay, voices-in-my-head, here goes: the operation was
a complete success! No complications, nothing unexpected, everything went
textbook-perfect. Katie and her mother are at the hospital even as I write
this, and if all goes well, my beloved Boodlie-Face will be home tomorrow
evening.But that's not the real bottom line. The real bottom line is that I fully expect that the post-op stage will be as hitchless... is that a word? hitchless?... as the operation itself. I now believe that fully and completely. I didn't just see the result of the mojonation in a successful operation; my mother and wife and I actually felt it. I wrote in my previous email that I'm not a very religious person. I am now going to reassess that stance. One cannot feel what I have felt, and am feeling, without being touched very profoundly, and I have Wil and all the
well-wishers to thank for that as well.- Bob Roth, WWDN fan, and one very happy daddy to one beautiful little girl
Stop for a second now.
That feeling you have? That one that starts in the center of your body, and radiates outward to your fingers and toes? That joy? That astonishment? That feeling.
With just the tiniest bit of effort, you sent kind, loving thoughts out to a complete stranger, expecting nothing in return, and this is the result.
I defy anyone to tell me that we don't have the power to change the world.
November 26, 2002
Play for today
To everyone who took a moment of their time and sent positive energy to Bob and his daughter in Iowa: Thank you. There are so many comments in that entry, and so much positive energy...someone commented, quite rightly, that if more people would take a moment out of their day to focus on the positive in life, and share that happiness with others, we'd live in a much better world. Thank you all for making a difference. I mean it.
Haven't heard back from Bob, yet, but when I do, I'll be sure to let everyone know how Katie did.
Today, my friend Kevin and I went down to sixspace to get a closer look at the Glen E. Friedman show, because it closes on Saturday, and have lunch with my friend Sean, who co-owns the gallery. It was awesome. The art scene in Los Angeles has come a long way in the last 5 years, and Sean and Caryn's gallery is set to be one of the leading galleries in the city. I'm really excited for them, and I can't wait to go see their next show.
Also, while googling for links to put into yesterday's entry, I stumbled onto this review of "python," which would be the worst movie I ever did, if "The Curse" didn't exist. I just classified it as a "pay the bills while dressed up like a punk rocker" movie, but for some reason, they actually liked it, and gave it a "B-."
Be gentle.
UPDATE:Some of you masochists have actually talked about wanting to see this movie. Here's an Amazon link. If you really need to see this POS, and you get it from this link, I'll get twenty-five cents. Which is twenty-four cents more than they spent on the snake. ;)
November 25, 2002
Mojo
I think about things like this all the time...if you had a chance to make a difference in someone's life, however small, would you do it?
Read on...
"A short while ago, on two occasions I believe, you requested some "mojo" from your website fans, of which I happen to be one (I don't care what others think, I liked Wesley on ST:TNG). And, upon your request, was one of the people who took a minute to "beam some mojo" your way.Well, although you really don't owe me squat, I would like to ask the same favor in return.
You see, my daughter, "Katie" to her friends, and "Boodlie-Face" to her daddy; don't ask :) is having an operation tomorrow morning. Specifically, she is having a Bilateral Ureteral Reimplantation to fix her Bladder Reflux problem. She needs this done, as she has Reflux Grade 3 on the left side, and a high Grade 2 on the right. At any rate, it's pretty bad, and without this, her kidneys are almost certain to become damaged.
Understand, this is what everyone tells me is a "routine operation". But frankly, my mind has been awash with the most horrible scenarios. I'm told that this is normal for a father, especially for a first child. It doesn't make me feel any better, however. My 16 month old beautiful baby girl is going under the knife, and there is f*ck-all I can do to help, and the feelings of despair and helplessness that a father feels at a time like this can be quite overwhelming.
I'm not a very religious person, although I was raised to be a good Protestant boy. I have found myself silently praying over this, though, in part to try (unsuccessfully) to ease my own mind. I have come to the conclusion, though, that *anything* done is a positive manner can help. I do have my own website, although I get absolutely nada for traffic. Some of us don't have the name or face recognition of Uncle Willie. I don't have 50,000 monkeys that I can draw upon to try to get the mojo working for my daughter to help her through her operation successfully. I can only ask you. Could you put a small blurb on your site, just asking your huge fanbase to send the love, the prayers, the positive energy, the white light, the mojo, the *whatever* my daughter's way tomorrow morning?
Her operation is tomorrow morning, November 26, 2002 at 8:00 am. CST, and is supposed to last for 3 hours. It is taking place at the University of Iowa Hospital, in Iowa City, Iowa. Did I mention it's in Iowa? It's in Iowa. You know. Corn. Soy beans. Iowa. :)"
I have been so blessed since I opened this lame website. People have sent me warm wishes and deeply personal stories when they've responded to the things I've written. Growing up in a medical family, I have come to believe that there is no such thing as a "routine operation" when you or someone you love is the subject.
I hope that you'll take a moment tomorrow, and spare a thought for Bob and his baby girl, who are in Iowa.
Iowa. Iowa. Iowa.
Mojo. Mojo. Mojo.
:)
November 19, 2002
1 wish, granted.
It absolutely, positively, does not get any better than this.
November 12, 2002
12.11.02
I'm putting my time into finishing my book this week, so updates may be infrequent, but I wanted to give up a couple of computer things:
- Over at Lockergnome's Penguin Shell, Tony is running a great week-long tutorial on using procmail to get rid of spam. I'll be following it all week, moving closer and closer to getting a sendmail server working here at home.
Yeah, that's right, sendmail. See, I've been having a real good time with computers for about a month now, and I need a reason to hate them again.
- Tonight, at 6:20 PM PST, I'll be a guest on MacRadio. I'll be talking about my iBook, Linux, my upcoming book, and stuff. It should be a good time, and you can listen in right through your browser.
Finally, my friend sent me this page of really cool fractals he made. I wish you would like it.
Now, I am leaving to go buy the good version of Lord of the Rings, before I park my ass beneath a tree in a park to write.
Life is good.
October 23, 2002
It's one more, isn't it?
Blatantly stolen from BBSpot, which should be okay because Brian is sort of a friend:
Reasons Steve from Dell Should be Fired 11. Michael Dell tired of hearing "Dude you're getting a... you!" 10. Addiction to canned air becoming a real problem. 9. Was seen near the HP headquarters wearing a cow costume. 8. Too many girls are buying computers. 7. More "computer savvy" Wil Wheaton close to signing a deal. 6. Consumers feel Steve talks too high tech. 5. Bidding war with The McLaughlin Group quickly reaching stratosphere. 4. Simon Cowell thinks his performance is complete rubbish. 3. His MENSA wrap parties get too out of hand. 2. Keanu Reeves threatened identity theft lawsuit. 1. Market research show dude market completely saturated.
October 3, 2002
MoMove
Star Trek Dot Com has a review of the TNG con. They had some very nice things to say about my talk and stuff. :-)
Fark also has this great Photoshop thingy going on, that's really funny. Turns out it's time for me to get a new shirt.
September 23, 2002
Thirsty?
Been a hectic morning. Cool story coming later today, I promise.
September 9, 2002
Chuck, Chuck, bo buck...
September 6, 2002
P-Funk
Man, you know what I hate?
When I'm running late, and I grab a pair of pants out of my dresser, and I don't realize until it's too late that they sat in the dryer too long, so they're sort of funky smelling.
That's right, I'm wearing my funky pants today.
August 19, 2002
Rhymes with News
Today, I present to you, the faceless internet monkey, a short collection of news items featuring me, or my friends.
Enjoy them in moderation. (+1, Interesting...I hope):
- My good friend Seth Wiley, genius director of the award-winning film "The Good Things," featuring yours truly, is the focus of a really cool story in today's LA Times. (May require annoying registration.)
- Another film that I'm in and I'm extremely proud of, Jane White Is Sick And Twisted, was recently entered into the Melbourne Underground Film Festival, along with about 80 other films. The festival awards 12 prizes, and Jane took home 2 of them: The Special Jury Prize, and Best Actor: Wil Wheaton. (!)
- This Thursday, you can watch me on TechTV's The Screen Savers, before I head into the DNA Lounge in San Francisco to defend your right to free speech and parody on the Internet as I go toe to toe with Barney in a celebrity boxing match brought to you by the Electronic Frontier Foundation's Chilling Effects project.
- My friend The Dave at KWOD 106.5 in the land of Muscle Cars, Mullets and Tank Tops is spending the next week living on a mountain (sort of) to raise money for Chicks In Crisis.
- All these damn links mean that this entry has taken longer to write than "The Trade," and all three parts of "The Wesley Dialogues."
- I'm helping my dad auction off this spiffy Elvis thing he has on eBay. Look for the link tomorrow.
- I decided today that my birthday present to myself will be a Magellan Meridian Platinum GPSr.
- I am now going to have a romantic dinner with my wife.
- So there.
July 16, 2002
Epitaph
Spudnuts is a familiar name to the regular WWDN reader.
He makes me, and everyone else, laugh and think, and laugh some more.
He also types in this form.
That.
Is.
Very.
Unique.
Well. I recently read something he wrote, and asked him if I could post it here, because I thought it was really cool.
Quoth Spudnuts:
I have this thing for cemeteries. Always have. I'm not morbid or goth or anything. They usually are just scenic, empty, and verdant.
But I always notice the generic script that accompanies even the most flamboyant tombstone. It makes no sense. Surely, there must have been some cut-ups, clowns, subversives, eccentrics, mavericks, firebrands, freakshows, or just someone who wants MORE on their grave than...
"Died in Troutdale."
What is so fucking sacred about a tombstone that you can't be shocked or amused when you happen upon the burial site of some HUMAN?
Jesus.
It's like being interred at the Christian Science Reading Room, laundry mat, or DMV.
So...
INSTITUTIONAL and sterile.
Then...
Who knows?
Maybe only the boring ones actually get a gravestone. All the interesting ones had their ashes scattered from a hangglider over Euro Disney.
Two years ago, I wrote down about fifty variations I would like on my tombstone. Here are a couple of the better ones...
-- Caucasian. Gamer. Hermaphrodite.
-- He was better than you
-- It's fucking dark in here
-- Buried with a big sack of emeralds. No, really.
-- Secret agent
-- He owned a television
-- He was kind of funny in an annoying sort of way
-- RIP BFD
-- He went straight to Hell
-- Feeds upon the blood of the Irving
-- He is in space now
-- Deposit urine here
-- He neglected his colon
-- Yet another dead guy
-- He was full of shit
July 9, 2002
Let them play
I have been a baseball fan my entire life. When you cut me, I bleed Dodger Blue. I can remember stats and significant dates in baseball history as clearly as I can recall birthdays and anniversaries in my family.
I hate the DH, I wish they'd raise the mound. I sing "Take me out to the ballgame" when I watch the games on TV.
I buy the Baseball Prospectus each year.
I calculate player's OPS.
I play roto every season.
I keep score during most games I watch, and I save my scoresheets in a folder in my closet.
When I play softball, I hear Vin Scully and Harry Carry calling the game in my head.
Yeah, I am a baseball fan.
I watch the All Star game. Every year. If I'm not going to be home, I tape it, and if I catch a replay of a classic game on ESPN, I'm lost for the duration.
Yeah, I'm a baseball fan, and I am furious. I mean, vein-popping, ear-steaming, teeth-gnashing, hair-pulling furious.
Just when I thought that Bud "King Jackass" Selig couldn't do more damage to the game, just when I thought that we'd nearly hit rock-bottom, he calls the freakin' All-Star game!
A major comeback by the AL, amazing individual efforts from players on both teams, towering home runs and extra innings, the hated Barry Bonds being robbed of a homer in the 2nd only to hit a two run shot in the third.
The first game in a decade that is TRULY exciting and Selig calls it.
No winner, no MVP. Randy Johnson couldn't even be bothered to show up.
Those fans who paid their money to watch a game tonight in Milwaukee expected to see a full game. With a winner and an MVP ceremony. That's what they paid for, and that's what they deserved.
What they and we got was a nice big "thanks for your money, now please leave."
I don't buy this idea that the game doesn't mean anything, so the players shouldn't give their all. Maybe it doesn't mean anything to the players, but it sure means a lot to us fans. Sure, it doesn't count towards anything in the standings, but we baseball fans wait each year for this mid-summer classic, when the best of the best show us what they can do. It is supposed to be an honor to play in the All Star game. It is supposed to be a time when the owners and players give something back to the fans.
Major League Baseball should be ashamed of itself. During a year when Selig has talked of contraction, players are threatening to strike, and the spectre of steriod abuse looms large over each and every ballpark, this game was an opportunity for Baseball and it's players to transcend the controversy and just play, the way we all play in sandlots and back fields and vacant lots all across America.
Instead, they showed us what they're really made of, and it's outrageous.
I have been a baseball fan my entire life, but I promise you this: after tonight's disgraceful ending to an otherwise magnificent game, if there is even one day of strike or lockout, I'm done.
Let them play, Bud. Let them play.
June 18, 2002
Everything's coming up LEGO!
June 12, 2002
113-107
So the Lakers just won the NBA Championship for the third year in a row.
You know how I know that I am 100% Los Angeles sports fan?
As soon as the game was over, I turned on the local news channel so that I can watch the victory riot.
So far, it's pretty bush league, but I'm sure they'll be flipping over cars within the hour.
UPDATE: Dang. The LAPD got in there with their rubber bullets and tear gas, and they didn't even let the fans start one fire.
Oh well. There's always the victory parade.
June 6, 2002
I'm thuper
Okay, so I'm probably way behind the curve on this one, but I found my way to this guy's website, and because of that, I found my way to the Build-Yourself-As-A-Southpark-Character-Thingy.
It requires flash, and it entertained me for tens of minutes.
Have a great weekend, everybody.
Go Lakers!
It's new to you!
Summertime in my youth was always a double-edged sword.
On the one hand, it meant no school, and long days of swimming, exploring the wash, daring each other to race our bikes without hands down The Big Hill, and endless sleepovers.
On the other hand, it meant that there wouldn't be anything new or interesting on TV for at least four months.
Isn't it strange, that as children we could watch the same episodes of Scooby Doo and Gilligan's Island over and over again, and never get tired of them, but when summer showed up, and CHiPs went into re-runs, it was a major thing?
Maybe it's just me.
So I hated re-runs. I always felt like the people making the shows were loafing, and I wanted my TV, dammit.
Then eMpTyVee came along, and gave me the attention span of a ferret, and I didn't care any more.
Oh, this is totally unrelated to anything, but I have really nasty poison oak on my right arm, and the back of my left hand. I must have gotten it when I took Ryan geocaching last weekend. Yesterday, I scratched my arm so badly I made it bleed. I looked like I was from one of those scary movies about a guy who has poison oak and he scratches his arm so badly it bleeds. Scary!
Where was I? Ah. Reruns.
So I hated them. But, since I work primarily as a writer now, I understand that there are days, weeks, or even months, when you are just completely out of ideas.
This week has been like that. All of my creative energy is going to Arena, the ACME show, and getting ready for the sketch comedy show on the cruise.
But you know the cool thing about re-runs? If you didn't watch every episode, the re-run would be what the geniuses at NBC called "New To You!" Meaning, of course, that they wouldn't have to do any new work, and they could entertain a whole new group of people for free.
So guess what I'm doing today? Re-running an old weblog entry from August 27, 2001.
It's a story that I really like to tell, and that I'd like to share with anyone who's just showing up for the first time around here.
It's the story of how my wife found our dog, and it's called "Save Ferris."
Save Ferris
I'm listening to Cake right now. Have you noticed that Cake is one of those bands that evokes a visceral reaction in people? I mean, they either really, really love it, or they really, really hate it. I dunno, maybe it's just me.
Here's the story of Ferris:
My wife is the coolest, ever. You know that stupid corny hallmark-card thing about someone making you want to be a better person? Well, sorry, I like to be anti and all Emo and shit, but it's true. I love my wife more than anything, and she really does make me want to be a better person. I could gush about her for pages here, but I'm not gonna. I am going to exercise restraint.
Oh, fuck that. I knew from the moment that I saw Anne that I would marry her. Isn't that weird? Has that ever happened to someone who wasn't in some godawful Nora Ephron movie? And the way we met...it was all timing. My best girlfriend, Stephanie, worked with Anne for YEARS, but she never introduced us...I mean, she even babysat Anne's kids, at MY PARENT'S HOUSE when we were younger, and she never introduced me to Anne...because, when we look back at stuff, the timing was just all wrong. We weren't ready to meet each other. But when we did, it was bootylicious.
Anne is beautiful. I mean, she is fucking hella rad.
Hella.
Hella.
Hella.
I always joke that when we are out, people look at us and complain that there's another hot babe with a geek. I say that I am Bob Goldthwait to her Nikki Cox, David Copperfield to her Claudia Schiffer, Sigfried to her Roy...I truly adore my wife, and that's all I have to say about that.
One of the things I adore about her is how she has what Soul Coughing called "Boundless Love". Anne works every day, takes her kids to school, picks them up, deals with their dad, and still has time to make me feel like I'm important in her life.
We have this fake dog poop that someone gave us a long time ago, and we have the game that we play, where we try to put the poop in each other's stuff. Recently, I stuck it in the toe of her shoe, which was in her suitcase. She found it when she put her shoe on in Vegas. She put it in the exact middle of my bed, under the sheets, and it scared the hell out of me when I jumped into bed around 230 or something last week. My point is, my wife is cool, okay? Yesterday, when I was sobbing like a little bitch in our bedroom, she came in, sat next to me, put her arm around me, and just sat there, loving me. I could feel it. Then she gave me Kleenex, and told me that she'd leave me alone until I felt better.
So you need to know that to understand the story of Ferris.
Anne is a sucker for hard-luck cases, especially animals. One time a few years ago, she almost got hit on the freeway, because she saw a kitten running in the slow lane...so she stopped her car right there and got out to save the kitten, but it got hit by a car just before Anne could get to it, and Anne sat on the freeway, holding the kitten while it died in her hands.
She was fucked up about it for months.
So about 18 months ago, she and I are on our patio, and we hear this meowing coming from our garage. We both thought it was one of my cats, Biko or Sketch, (who are both inside cats, but occasionally get out), so we went to look...and out comes this skinny black cat with no tail. Anne immediately falls in love with him, and she takes him to the vet, to get him healthy again, while I make the "Found Cat" posters. Long story short: We thought he was going to die, the vet said he was just dehydrated, we got him shots, and Anne named him "Felix". He has lived with us ever since, and he is one ot the coolest cats, ever.
Shortly after Felix came to live with us, a woman Anne works with told us about this guide dog she trained, who was also named Felix. She told us that Felix works for a guy up in Canada (and you can't spell "runaway production" without Canada!), and Felix had been hit by a car, and they weren't sure if he would be able to work as a guide dog any more. I guess when a service dog has to be retired, they give the person who trained that animal the right of first refusal as a place to live out their life, but Rita (Anne's friend) lives in an apartment with her husband and young son. Not the best place for a 90 pound lab. So Rita asked her if Felix could come to live with us, and of course Anne said "yes". Long story short: Felix was okay, and he's still working with his guy in Canada. Which is great, because I can only imagine what the bond between service dog and owner must be like. I would just speculate that it's similar to parent-child, and I always hoped that Felix would be able to stay with his guy. In the process of waiting to see if Felix would come live with us, we got on a list for guide dogs who flunk their final exam, because we have wanted a dog for AGES, and we thought that would be the best way to get one.
We are ADAMANTLY opposed to pet stores selling dogs and cats, by the way /soapbox.
Anyway, cut to Memorial day this year. We have no dog. Anne is taking the kids to Home Depot, so they can buy the materials necessary to make a grind rail (they're all about the short boards. I'm all about the long boards. It makes for an interesting dynamic when we skate).
Funny aside: Ryan (12) and Nolan (10) were talking about how excited they were to get a grind rail, which they kept calling a "pole". Nolan says to Ryan, "We TOTALLY have to get some grinding wax, Ryan!" Ryan replies, "Yeah, so we can wax our pole!"
Okay, so they're leaving the Home Depot, and instead of going to the left, to get back to the freeway like they always do, Anne goes right, and passes this bus stop, where this tiny little dog is chewing on a t-shirt. Anne says that she felt compelled to stop and save her. So she did. As soon as she got out of the car, the dog ran into some Oleander bushes, and Anne spent close to 30 minutes getting her out, and took her to an Emergency vet, for some shots and to get the ticks out of her ears.
So Anne brings home this skinny, 27 pound, depressed little dog, and I must be totally honest, I was pissed. I was so mad that she had made this huge decision to take on the responsibility of a dog without consulting me. I mean, we have enough responsibilities already, you know? We really had it out. There was much gnashing of teeth, and Sir Robin soiled his armor. We finally agreed to keep her for a few days, and see how she was, and if she wasn't any better, we'd take her to a shelter where they don't euthanize the animals.
Well, the dog was terrified of me. She had CLEARLY been abused by a man, and she was terrified of men. "Great," I thought, "I'm going to be responsible for a dog who never lets me pet her. Terriffic."
And for the first 12 hours--wait, I know I'm not supposed to start a sentence with a conjunction. But I can't spell for shit, so why are you complaining now? Jeeze. Get off my back, Mrs. Lee [9th grade english teacher who flunked me because she said I couldn't write. I win.]--for the first 12 hours, she sat by the side door, never moving, never eating, just looking depressed. But somehow, my amazing wife loved this dog enough, and totally turned her around. Within 12 hours she was wagging her entire body, eating, chasing a tennis ball, and generally acting like a dog. And she let me pet her, and started following me everywhere around our house.
So we decided to keep her. But she needed a name...and that was very important. I wanted to give her a name from Mythology..."Athena" or "Psyche" or something. I know, lame. Deal. The kids wanted to name her "Haley", which didn't work for me at ALL, because in high school I had the most painful crush on a girl named Haley who treated me like Duckie...so we decided that we'd try on different names for a few days, and the right one would reveal itself to us.
Anne comes home from work the next day, comes in the door, looks at me and says, "Ferris."
"Bueller?"
"Sort of. Save Ferris!"
Okay, there is this band from OC that we LOVE called Save Ferris. They play with our friends fairview a lot. They rule.
Anne says, "Get it? Save Ferris. I totally saved Ferris!"
I looked at the dog, looked at her sweet, marble eyes and soft little puppy-fuzzy-head, and it was perfect. Not surprising, considering that it came from my wife.
So her name is "Ferris".
Isn't that a cool story?
Anyone?
Anyone?
Bueller?
Bueller?
June 4, 2002
CruiseTrek
This is a public service announcement, with guitar!
I have signed on to attend the upcoming CruiseTrek to Alaska.
CruiseTrek is always lots of fun, and I'm really looking forward to being a part of this year's cruise. I'll be bringing a small sketch comedy troupe with me, and we'll be performing a sketch show, similar to the one we did in Las Vegas, but with some new material. We'll also be performing an improv show, and we're going to run some improv workshops for anyone who's interested. You can get more information about the cruise here.
In completely unrelated news, I hung a screen door over the weekend, and it was one of the hardest, most frustrating home improvement things I've ever done.
How about a thought for today? We haven't had one of those in quite some time:
"Consistency is the last resort of the unimaginative."
-Oscar Wilde
June 2, 2002
112-106
112-106
May 31, 2002
The World Is New
I am under a brutal deadline at work, and I'm working on The Next Big Thing(tm) right now, so updates are going to be a little thin for a few days.
However, I would like to share a couple of spiffy mentions I've gotten this week:
First, I was mentioned in McPaper as one of the Top Ten Celebrities We'd Like To See Back On Television.
I'm guessing that G4 doesn't count just yet, since we're in a relatively small number of homes :-)
Speaking of G4, when I was at E3 last week, I did an interview for HomeLan Fed, which came out pretty well.
Finally, tonight on the JKvS Show our guest is Save Ferris! If you're in LA, it's really worth it to come and see the show. They're a great band, and we're going to have lots of fun tonight.
Hope everyone has a good weekend. I should have some good stuff next week.
May 17, 2002
Misc.
Last night, at the Los Angeles Underground Film Festival Awards Dinner, Jane White is Sick and Twisted won best comedy, and my friend Danica won best new director for her movie Speechless, in which I have a small part.
How cool is that?! I'm in two movies which won awards, and I got to meet Zack Ward, who played Scut Farcus (He had yellow eyes...so help me God, yellow eyes), who was hosting the awards ceremony. It was funny...during the opening of the ceremony, he's reading his prepared jokes, which are really funny, and he looks at me (I was sitting near the stage) and he totally stops and says, "Hey, Wil Wheaton! How you feeling?" The whole room is staring at me, so I say, "Uhhh...singled out." Which is really funny, you see, because I was sitting next to my friend Chris Hardwick, who is not only in Jane White, but also hosted Singled Out on eMpTyVee. Unfortunately, I was the only one in the room who enjoyed the ironic humor.
You know, this is also a good time to share with everyone that Jane White has gotten rave reviews, and has also won quite a few awards! I'm extremely proud of Jane White, because it's the first movie that I've done that is really just 100% comedy (on purpose, unlike The Curse).
When we were done at the awards dinner, Chris talked me into going up the street to The Laugh Factory, because he's friends with Bob Saget, and Saget was doing a set. Now, here's the thing about Saget: He's insanely dirty, profane, raunchy, offensive, and hilarious in person. He is so unlike the stuff he does on TV, and if you ever get a chance to see him, I highly recomend it.
Three random things:
I noticed this morning that searching for "Wheaton" on Google Images gives rather interesting results.
I had an interesting thought about why Geocaching appeals to me so much, especially as an activity to do with the kids: it's about the journey, much more than it is about the destination.
My step-kids have spent so much time around hyper-competitive Little League and Soccer parents and coaches, who put the focus on winning at all costs, rather than just playing (despite what the various organizations claim about sportsmanship) that I want them to be in an environment where their enjoyment is in the doing, rather than based solely on their success. Geocaching puts the focus right where I want it to be, and even if we don't find the cache just taking the hike and spending the time together is awesome.
Some birds are building a nest in my breezeway. I think that's really cool.
Thought for today:
"If you hate your parents, the man or the establishment, don't show them up by getting wasted and wrapping your car around a tree. If you really want to rebel against your parents: outearn them, outlive them, and know more than they do."
-Henry Rollins
May 14, 2002
The Need To Win
The Need To Win
When an archer is shooting for nothing
He has all his skill.
If he shoots for a brass buckle
He is already nervous.
If he shoots for a prize of gold
He goes blind
Or sees two targets-
He is out of his mind!
His skill has not changed. But the prize
Divides him. He cares.
He thinks more of winning
Than of shooting-
And the need to win
Drains him of power.
-Selections, Chuang Tzu
May 10, 2002
Perchance to dream...
Everyone who emailed and commented seemed to really enjoy the last entry, and I'm really happy about that. I am very proud of it, and I'm going to see if I can get it published someplace. This is an odd feeling for me, because I am usually very critical of everything I do, which prevents me from sitting back and saying to myself, "Hey, Wil! You did a good job! Enjoy it!"
Anyway, I'm going to submit The Trade to This American Life, and see what happens. Cross your collective fingers for me, if you don't mind. :-)
Anne shared a sentiment with me last night, which I think she heard from my mom, and it is the thought for today:
"A mother is only as happy as her saddest child."
May 6, 2002
Screen Savers
I just found out that my weblog is going to be featured on The Screen Savers tonight.
So I got to thinking (always a dangerous thing) that if they show a screen shot of my site, this entry will be at the top.
So it would be like I'm in the background at a baseball game, waving to someone through the TV.
*wave*
*wave*
God, I am such a dork.
USA! USA! USA!
This is just too good to pass up.
April 29, 2002
Sigh
You know, I've been a Kings fan since the purple and gold days.
So you'd think I'd be used to this.
But goddammit! They showed such promise in this series...but here's the thing: you don't score 4 goals on Patrick Roy in a game 7, ever. Forget the empty-netter. Longtime Kings fans saw that one coming.
On the other hand, it is strangely reassuring and familiar to have the Kings eliminated in the first round of the playoffs. And that meltdown in the third period was vintage.
Oh well, at least we have the Dodgers.
Oh, wait.
Nevermind.
April 26, 2002
Game ON!
April 26th is here, doo dah, doo dah.
Hey! My Los Angeles Kings beat the Colorado Avalanche in OVERTIME last night, to keep their playoff chances alive!
GO KINGS GO!
Nolan wants the Avalanche to win, because he always plays them as his team on PS2, so we had much fun last night, watching the game and cheering for our respective teams. Ryan isn't that crazy about hockey, but he did watch the first period with me...then I hammered him in USA vs. The World mode on NHL 2002.
I really treasure things like watching a game, or playing PS2 with them. Nolan even tried to work the "Hey Wil, since this is such an important game, can I stay up past my bedtime to see what happens?"
So of course I didn't give in...not. I let him stay up until the end of regulation, which was about 9:30...his bedtime's 9, so that wasn't too bad. When the Kings won in overtime (YEAH BABY!) I jumped up from the couch and gave one of those victory screams...you know the kind, right? I mean, unless you live in Chicago...or Sacramento.
Well, I gave one of those screams, and ran into the back of the house, not realizing that Nolan was probably asleep...until I got to his bedroom door, and saw him, lying on his bed, eyes shut. Without even opening his eyes he deadpans, "Kings won, huh?"
I love it when he deadpans stuff like that. I think he gets that from me.
So, I'll be away for the weekend with The Guys(tm). There won't be any more updates until Sunday night, or Monday night, depending on how crazy the weekend is.
I hope everyone has an awesome weekend, filled with magic and illusion!
/doug.henning
April 16, 2002
Hella
This is one of those updates where I say, "I don't have time to update!"
I've got ten billion things to do this week, so I don't think I'll have time to say much of anything here.
However, if you live in Sacramento, you may want to come out to Boomer and The Dave Day tomorrow. I'm coming up from Los Angeles to hang with them, and play dodgeball against Tiffany.
Yes, that Tiffany.
It should be hellafun.
Ah, incidentally, I have heard this Ashley Judd rumor, and it's news to me.
April 12, 2002
CowboyNeal
Hey! It's Friday, and that means we're all struggling to figure out what to do with our weekends...
Of course, if you live in or around Los Angeles, you can hop on some of our clean, safe, effecient and reliable public transportation, and come over to the ACME Comedy Theatre tonight, and catch me doing The J. Keith vanStraaten Show. Our lead guest tonight is David Carradine, who played Cain on Kung Fu!
Farkers know that this weekend is Fark Fest LA, and there are hellacrazy Fark opportunities. Should be Super-sized fun.
Now, seeing as how my wife and kids are out of town, you'd think that I'd be out this weekend drinking and enjoying some fine entertainment...but you'd be wrong. I'll be writing all weekend, and playing GTA 3, because I am that lame.
G4 made an announcement yesterday about our programming lineup. I'm still not allowed to say too much about my show, butI think I can safely say that we filmed two episodes yesterday, and I'm really, really happy with how they turned out. I'm really proud to be part of this show.
There is a message board that G4 has set up for all the shows (this link goes straight to Arena), and you can login and talk about my show with me and some of the people behind it...now, I heard from this magic talking donkey that the folks at my network are watching the traffic on the board to guage interest in the new shows. So if you're interested in Arena, and you want G4 to know, log in and tell them!
Finally, I found out something pretty cool yesterday: WWDN is ranked number 20 on the all-time top ten list* at Blogdex. I just thought that was really cool. This website has really grown over the past few months, and I love it that so many people are reading it. :-)
I hope everyone has a great weekend!
Thought for today:
"The further the spiritual evolution of mankind advances, the more certain it seems to me that the path to genuine religiosity does not lie through the fear of life, and the fear of death, and blind faith, but through striving after rational knowledge."-Albert Einstein
*I realize that you can't be number 20 on a top-ten list. Sure, I could change it, but it just illustrates my lameness in a beautiful way. :)
April 3, 2002
Arch Enemy of the Week!
Hey! Check it out! I'm the Arch Enemy of the Week over at Dogbus.com!
Something Awful also has a really funny story about $cientology today, where they take the now-familiar "space nerd Wil Wheaton" jab at me.
I love those guys.
Got your nose
March 26, 2002
Ruby Sees All
March 21, 2002
Quick Announcement
I'll be at the Grand Slam convention in Pasadena all weekend.
I'm giving a super short (20 minutes) talk on Saturday. I plan to print out and read SpongeBob and maybe a few other things from WWDN.
If you're a regular reader, I'd really like to meet you. Especially if you're a hot 19 year old cheerleader.
Hey, let me have my dreams okay?
Anyway, I hope to see lots of WWDN readers there.
Unless, of course, you're a freaky weirdo, in which case, Bob Picardo would like to invite you over for dinner.
Heh.
Oh, and if you can't make the convention, The Girl's Room is playing at 10AM Saturday and Sunday at the Sunset 5.
March 20, 2002
Another day, another interview
I spent some time over the weekend finally answering many interview requests. That's why you saw two yesterday, and another one today, at OSNews.
Thought for today:
"He's a complicated man, and no one understands him but his woman"
March 19, 2002
The fast and the humorous
I upgraded my internet access today.
I went from paying 49.99 a month for 732/128 to paying --get this-- 19.99 for 1500/512.
Hot damn!
A recently did an interview for this really funny website, and they posted it today. You may want to check it out.
When you're done with that, you may want to check out this other interview I did, all about love, and the smell of love. Namely, the smell of Panda Love.
I got a cool new shirt today. Check me out. Thanks, Roughy!
March 13, 2002
Today is Wednesday, March 13, 2002.
Now, when you have that moment in the day where you wonder to yourself, "Aw, shit. What day is it?" You can just click here, and now you'll know.
No need to thank me. I'm happy to help.
March 12, 2002
Biography
Just a reminder that tonight on A&E, you can catch the Biography of River Phoenix, which I narrate.
March 11, 2002
A moment of silence
I'd like everyone to put down the flags and quiet the dogs of war for a moment, and remember the people who lost their lives six months ago, today.
Thank you.
March 7, 2002
Just talk about the weather
I really love the weather today.
That's right. I'm talking about the weather. Nice, banal, weather conversation. Guaranteed not to stir up any controversy, or incite any riots.
Seriously, though. I had to be at work at 8 this morning, and, thanks to the wonderful Los Angeles freeway system, I had to leave my house at 6:30. This meant that I got up with the Sun, which is never a bad thing.
My neighborhood is just filled with all kinds of wildlife: Peacocks, wild parrots, Canadian geese, and the usual finches and sparrows that pretty common in Southern California. When I get up really early in the morning, I always walk out onto my patio, and just listen to them for a second. It's a really nice way to start the day, I think. On a misty morning like today, Ferris runs through the backyard, leaving little Ferris-prints in the wet grass, before she hurries to the back door, asking to be let in for breakfast.
When I left my house, I drove through this canyon nearby, and the tops of the hills were completely obscured by low-hanging fog and mist, which made LA look really pretty. Believe me, it's not easy to make LA look pretty.
By the time I got to work in West Los Angeles, the clouds and fog had lifted, and there was nothing but clear blue sky, and a really stiff breeze.
At lunch, I walked down the street to eat, and some of those little puffy clouds had shown up, and the wind was really making them truck across the sky, which was super cool to watch.
If you live in Northern California, you should totally know what type of day I'm talking about. We don't get these days often in SoCal, so I really appreciate them when we do.
Speaking of weather, I wrote another silly satire piecefor BBSpot. I went for a "man on the street" style of writing. It was fun.
That's all I've got for today, folks. I'm off to this charming market, where I can enjoy a wonderfully delicious halibut sandwich.
March 5, 2002
Top Ten
With gratitude to jbay:
Gary Condit's Top Ten Campaign Slogans
10. Remember me? Not too much I hope. Just enough to vote for me.
9. Let's Put The "Adult" Back In "Adultery"
8. Vote for me ... I've done nothing. I'm not even a suspect.
7. I have no skeletons in my closet...but you will need a warrant to look.
6. I Condid It
5. Make America's problems disappear. Vote Condit.
4. Vote for me and see what else I can get away with.
3. We're at war -- this is no time for bickering and arguing over who killed who ...
2. Do something for Gary, and he intern...er...in turn will do something for you...
1. Protect California Women -- Send Gary Back to Washington!
March 4, 2002
Gonads and Strife
OHMYGOD!
THISONETIME,IDIDANINTERVIEWFORTHEMONTREALGAZETTE, ANDIREADITTODAYANDIWENT
WEEEEEEEE!
March 2, 2002
Turtle Boy
Seven things I am happy about today:
- When I woke up this morning, my wife was spooning me.
- I refilled my birdfeeder, which hangs just outside my window, and my backyard is filled with birds.
- One of the birds, a cute little finch, has been hopping from the birdfeeder to the window ledge, and looking in at me all day long.
- My cat, Biko, keeps hopping up on the couch, and staring at the bird, who doesn't fly away!
- I installed a new microphone, and recorded some cool dialogue for the newest installment of Farkman!
- I'm this close to finishing up the last installment of SpongeBob Vega$ Pants.
- When I came home from work late Thursday night, Nolan was obviously happy to see me, and he kept climbing up onto my back, following me around the house, talking to me about all the things he did during the day, and telling me that he loves me.
And, a Thought for Today:
"Peace starts within each one of us. When we have inner peace, we can be at peace with those around us."
March 1, 2002
File under: Candy, tastes like.
Apparently, my poop tastes like candy.
Lots of people emailed me this link, because they authors used my picture in their advert, and I gotta admit, it's pretty damn funny.
And I love that the ad goes: Britney, Gillian Anderson, and me.
That's right, baby! Somewhere, somehow, someone thinks that I rate with the two hotties.
Speaking of Hotties, FARK has this post about voting for the 100 Sexiest Women of the Year at FHM magazine. I don't know how it happened, but take a look at the bottom right corner of their graphic.
WORD.
And thank you to everyone who commented on the last post. I read the whole thing when I got up this morning, and the perspective I've gained through your thoughtful remarks is very comforting.
February 24, 2002
O, Canada!
What can I say? Canada earned it.
Team USA's third period effort looked like the LA Kings, circa 1986.
Canada wanted it more badly, and they played much harder.
Seriously, they played some of the best hockey I have ever seen.
Congratulations, oh Great White North Ones!
O Canada!
Our home and native land!
True patriot love in all thy sons command.
With glowing hearts we see thee rise,
The True North strong and free!From far and wide,
O Canada, we stand on guard for thee.God keep our land glorious and free!
O Canada, we stand on guard for thee.O Canada, we stand on guard for thee.
Francais:
Ô Canada!
Terre de nos aïeux.
Ton front est ceint,
De fleurons glorieux.
Car ton bras
Sait porter l'épée,
Il sait porter la croix.
Ton histoire est une épopée,
des plus brillants exploits.
Et ta valeur,
de foi trempée,
protègera nos foyers et nos droits (bis).
Attention, Canada!
On behalf of all American hockey fans, I would like to officially begin the shit-talking:
Dear Canada,Today, we are going to kick your ass.
Oh, sure, the score, and the game, will undoubtedly be close, but we will be handing you your toque-wearing, back-bacon-eating, gold-medal-not-getting asses to you.
You may have invented the sport, and for that we will always be grateful, but it would seem that, in the last 50 years, you've passed the torch to...well, anyone else who would take it, really.
We'll happily take it from here.
Hey, don't feel too bad. You've still got all our film work, and Curling. Nobody can take that away from you.
Sincerely,
Wil
February 23, 2002
Duck Season! Rabbit Season!
I remember when Mel Blanc died, and there was this beautiful two-page tribute run by Warner Brothers in Variety.
On one page, there was a single microphone, illuminated by a spotlight.
On the facing page, tewnty or so Warner Brothers cartoon characters stood, heads bowed, eyes closed.
The caption read: "Speechless"
It brought tears to my eyes, because I wasn't as much of a badass then, as I am now.
So last night, when I heard that Chuck Jones died, I remembered that tribute in Variety, and it got me thinking...would the Merrie Melodies have been as cool as they were, without both of those guys?
Chuck Jones was being eulogized last night as the creator of Bugs Bunny, among others, but I bet you that he'd be the first to tell you that, without Mel Blanc, those would have just been drawings, and not full-fledged characters, as they were.
So now they're both gone, and holy crap, what a legacy they've left. I defy you to show me any person over the age of 25 who hasn't been profoundly affected by Looney Tunes, in one way or another.
I mean, without Looney Tunes, there would have been no Ren and Stimpy, for crying out loud!
I hope the Cartoon Network runs 900 hours of tribute to Chuck Jones. That'd be cool.
February 21, 2002
WTF?
February 19, 2002
Attention WWDN Shoppers
Last week, I added two new designs to the WWDN store.
One of the designs was drawn by my amazingly talented friend, Ben.
The other design was created by an amazing artist named Brad, who I don't know, at all...so I conducted this silly little interview with him, so that I, and the Posse, could get to know him a little bit better.
Ben, if you're reading this, I want to interview you next. It's nice being on the other side of the table for a change!
WIL: Your website, artpeace.com, has one of the most beautiful mission statements I've ever read. Would you talk a little bit about what influenced your beliefs?
BRAD: Well, Mr. Crusher, I think I believe in God, and I think God's pretty cool.
And I think that people are way too serious in life, and caught up in "self", so much so that they become very peaceless entities. I've found that people react very positively from my art; they start trippin' and sometimes even think they can paint and draw all of a sudden (those who are not visual artists). That's cool, cuz if a person thinks she or he can do something they will usually at least try to make something happen, and end up on a higher skill or mental plane than when they started. I get the same kind of inspired energy from artists whose work I admire.
W: You state that "the creative energy of art" can stimulate the positive
flow of peace. Personally, I completely agree with this ideal, but I wonder if you've seen it in action?
B: People get excited when they see something on canvas or paper or the movie screen that they think is the coolest thing they've ever seen. They talk to each other, they agree about the skillful execution or the tight special effects, they can converse about something heavy without even caring about any differences that may exist between them. A good piece of art can calm the need to tear off somebody's head. That's peaceful energy.
W: I feel that your work is inspired by Dali. Am I right, or am I O.J.?
B: You do NOT want to be O.J. right about now...Salvadore was the father of surrealism, a style from which I create most of my work.
W: Did you go to an art school? Care to plug said school? As an artist, how do you feel about formal education vs. experiential education for would-be
artists?
B: I went to the premiere art high school in Houston. I had to audition to get in, did so with flying colors, then flunked 12th grade cuz I fkd around and didn't do the senior project, which they announced during the final week was not just another project, but 1/2 the semester grade...missed it by 1/2 credit, and the instructor flunked me cuz I had been a smart ass to her a few weeks before. So I took typing in summer school, and now I can type about 80 wpm. That helps out alot on my Macintosh work.
As for the education thing? It's whatever way you get it. Some artists feel like they have to have some rules under their belt before they can get down; artists like me look for rules that will break if you hit 'em hard enough.
W: The design you did for WWDN, which you've called "Perfect Imperfection", is really amazing. Would you like to talk about what inspired this piece?
B: No.
W: The Dodgers have been on a steady decline since FOX bought them. New GM Dan Evans has said that they want to "win now, not rebuild". What do you think of this attitude?
B: ... What? . . . Ok, ok I'll talk about "Perfect Imperfection" if it'll keep
us friends. One of the most amazing and harmlessly eerie sights in nature to me is a tree in the winter time when you can see all the branches. A billion branches that form this spiritual maze leading in seemingly endless possible directions that life can take you in at any given moment. The overall shape of this tree is almost reminiscent of the human brain...endless nerve endings. The eye is vision, insight, creativity, intellect. The green and gold iris depict sunlight causing the green (life) to exist, but there really is no eye there, just the impression that one exists. This image is of something that is the core by which we seek to perfect the imperfection
of the human destiny. Ok?
If the Dodgers have this kind of record, I think they may never win if he doesn't rebuild now.
W: Art vs. Commerce, Art *AS* Commerce, Commerce as Art. Discuss.
B: Art battling commerce loses almost everytime, if you're trying to pay bills.
Commercial artists, a group to which I technically but not always joyfully belong, don't draw and paint what they want, but what somebody with some money they need wants drawn. They incorporate their own style, true, but it still only goes so far. Then art becomes commerce. It's good work--very skilled execution--but usually it didn't really come out of that artist's soul, just out of the need to eat. Dali didn't give a damn what people thought, just as long as the work was good in his own sight. That's how I am, I think that's how any true artist is, whether visual, musical, theatrical... whatever. Got to be real. Or else it's commerce masquerading
as art, and anybody who is actually alive can see right through it.
W: Your website is really cool, and the idea of walking through a building to check out the art is very similar to the the interactive menus on Vivid DVDs. Ever had a pornstar come to your website? Asia Carrera once emailed me, you know.
B: If she came (get it?) to my website, I never heard about it. I don't remember... did you ever get around to emailing her back?
W: Yeah, and I think I scared her away with my geekiness. She never responded. Guess I'll have to start fawning over some other pornstar now.
In addition to your website, you publish a magazine. Is publishing a magazine as hard as I think it is?
B: Before beginning work on Artpeace Uncovered Magazine which you can download subscription cards for at the website and mail in with your check or money order... o crap, that was shameless. I'm sorry...Wil, calm down, man--it
won't happen again. As I was -- I worked a few years at several local pubs in Houston and at an independent newspaper, so I got the experience needed to manage a large multi-department mag. Artpeace Uncovered actually premieres this coming September, and many, many thousands of copies will be distributed nationwide. It mainly focuses on nongalleried artists who me and my enlightened staff think kik ass, but the world hasn't yet been fully let in on that fact.
W: Thank you so very, very much for this amazing design. I think it's beautiful, and I am honored that you offered to do it for me. Thank you even more for answering my lame questions.
B: You know, Mr. Crusher, I'm actually one of the few people in the galaxy who don't hate you. I didn't think Captain Picard was grateful enough that time you saved the entire ship, so it is me who is honored to present to you a token of my appreciation. Peace and Prosperity to you, your family and all your readers.
W: Peace and Prosperity to you, as well. By the way, call me Mr. Crusher again, and I'll kick you in the nuts.
February 12, 2002
Vote Valerie!
If you're a SAG member, please click below, and read more.
If you're not a SAG member, you can read it, but it probably won't make much sense to you.
I support Valerie Harper for President of the Screen Actor's Guild, and I hope that, if you're a SAG member who cares about your union, you will, too.
February 11, 2002
KITT
Earlier today, I posted the Greatest Picture, EVER!
There was much discussion about Knight Rider, and I have wondered this all day: Am I the only person who was crestfallen upon finding out that the voice of KITT was not, in fact, the voice of the car, but was, in truth, the voice of actor William Daniels?
When Bill was president of SAG, I had lots of meetings with him, because I am on the Board of Directors, and was part of our TV and Theatrical negotiating team. When I would have a meeting with Bill, I'd call Anne, and tell her, "I won't make it for dinner tonight. I have a meeting with KITT." And she'd say, "Is it in his office? Or is he meeting you around back in 5, buddy?"
Continuing the trip down Knight Rider lane...back in the old days, when there was only one Universal Studios, and the main focus of the whole experience was the tour, not the damn animal shows and gift shops...well, okay, it was the gift shops, but not as transparently as it is now...
But I digress.
Back in the day, at Universal Studios, they had a KITT car parked in this area where you could go and sit in it, and, I am not making this up, talk to KITT!
You could ask KITT all sorts of questions, and while you waited in line, you could hear the questions asked, and the answers given out by none other than KITT HIMSELF!
So people would sit in KITT, and ask all sorts of questions about the show, and "what did you do in episode [whatever]?", and all sorts of technical questions about the specifics of his design, etc.
I so badly wanted to get into the car, and say, "Hey, KITT, I was wondering, do you ever cut loose when the people go home? I mean, tell me the truth. You can kick the A-Team Van's ass, right? Do you ever just head on over to the backlot and do donuts, just because you can?"
But I totally chickened out, and, when I got up there, I froze, and asked, "What's your top speed, KITT?"
The sad thing is, I can't even remember what the answer was.
update: 8:41 PM PST: Cherish, a cool girl and helpful soapbox mod, just sent me this picture of her, sitting in KITT!
Second. Best. Picture. EVER.
Rock.
February 9, 2002
Rats!
We've just discovered, in the last couple of days, that some rats (Rats! Rats! F-ing rats with...aw, forget it) have moved into our attic, and maybe even down some walls.
So I'm wondering, has anyone ever used those sonic repeller as seen on TV thingies? If so, have they worked?
I'd so very much like it if the rats would leave.
February 7, 2002
Mailbox is full
On my way home today, I stopped at the store, and picked up "The Awful Truth" on DVD. It's an awesome TV show created by the equally awesome Michael Moore, creator of "Roger and Me", and "Downsize This!"
I was so moved by a segment on his show, that I had to write him an email, which came back because his mailbox is full.
So I'm reprinting it, here, because I know I'll get busy and forget to send it:
To: [email protected]
Subject: The Awful TruthHi Michael,
I just bought the DVD collection of "The Awful Truth", and I'm still wiping my tears of fury which became tears of joy, after watching you save a man's life, in episode one.
You continue to be an inspiration to me.
Thank you for making a difference!
Fondly and respectfully yours,
Wil Wheaton
Los Angeles, CA--------------------------
WIL WHEATON DOT NET
May peace prevail on earth
--------------------------
February 2, 2002
02.02.02
This has got to be the coolest day to write, this year. (If it isn't, I'm sure someone will point that out!)
I was watching A&E last night, and there was a show all about Jack Benny. I guess Jack Benny used to always refer to things the same way I do, calling them "the best", or "the most amazing", or whatever.
One of his friends said that Jack Benny would come in from a shoeshine, and say, "Would you look at this shine? This is the best shine, ever!". After eating a lunch, he'd say, "How about this ham and cheese? This has got to be the best ham and cheese I've ever had!"
Sounds like he had a mostly postive attitude, and really enjoyed life. I thought that was really cool.
So it came to my attention that today is Brent Spiner's birthday. Happy birthday, Brent! He must be at least as old as I am, now. Wow.
Neverland continues to be amazing. I will take some pictures and put a few of them up this coming week.
Jane White is getting some RAVE reviews. Check out Box Office Magazine, Entertainment Today, and Indie Rag. We are having more Jane screenings soon, so watch this space, or check the official Jane website for more info. I just love Jane White, from top to bottom. Everything about this movie makes me smile, and I hope you will all get a chance to see it.
I was sent a copy of DHTML and CSS for the World Wide Web, from peachpit press (Thank you, ALEXA!), and I've been reading it in all my free time. This site is going to be so badass, I can't even begin to describe it. Looking at my source makes me cringe, right now, but Roughy and I should have the whole thing fixed RSN. :)
Now, I am off to take lunch to my lovely wife, who is over-booked with clients today at the salon (yes, that's right. My wife is that good a hairdresser. They over-book, baby!).
Thought for today comes again from the Lama:
"Seeking blessings from outsiders is not right. Your life is on your own shoulders."
Have a good weekend, everyone.
January 31, 2002
Happy Birthday, KC
Today is my friend Kevin's birthday.
Kevin hates it when people make a big deal about his birthday, so that's exactly what I'm doing.
Ha.
RTFM
This made me laugh out loud.
It's been quite some time since we had some controversy, too...I think that, regardless of political ideology, we can all agree that the political process must be put back into the hands of the people, and taken away from wealthy individuals and corporations. My greatest hope is that the Enron collapse, and the subsequent investigations (if ever something was screaming for an independent counsel, I'd say this is on the list), will get some real campaign finance reform passed, and maybe people will be so outraged that they'll actually register to vote, and participate in our government.
You are registered to vote, and informed about your choices, aren't you?
January 28, 2002
Hazy shade of Winter
One of the things I love about my new job is that I can sit at my desk, and look out across Century City, and see the Hollywood sign and Griffith observatory. Then I can get up, walk for 15 feet, and look out across Santa Monica and the Pacific Ocean...on a beautiful day like today, when we have lots of little fluffy clouds (to borrow a phrase from The Orb, who borrowed it from Rickie Lee Jones, from a conversation she was having with LeVar Burton on Reading Rainbow), it looks magical, like an animated movie. On days like today, I am insanely envious of my friends who live in Northern California, who get to have days like this all the time.
Now that the sun is low in the sky, and just about to sink into the ocean, the sky has darkened, and the clouds have lost that friendly look, in favor of a sinister, brooding, stormy look. In the time it has taken me to write this paragraph, the sun has lit of the reflective sides of the buildings in Century City, and there are these beautiful pillars of fire and ice reaching into the indigo January sky.
It would seem that Winter has at last decided to come to Southern California. It's about time!
January 27, 2002
Blowing the lead, 101
What the hell happened with the Lakers today?
Spudnuts?
January 26, 2002
Wil and FARK, sitting in a tree...
It has just come to my attention that I haven't given up the love for FARK recently.
I really need to take a second out of my day, stop cleaning the house, and give up the farkin' love for FARK!
FARK voted for me to be entertainer of the year, before lowtax and I were squeezed out by The Man!
FARK provides the world with boobies, weeners, and beer!
FARK may even have a Los Angeles FARKFest this year!
Fb- is the father, France surrenders, and Wil Wheaton sucks. Long live FARK!
January 24, 2002
Rumble in the Jungle
Over at FARK, they are discussing who would win in a fight if it was Wesley vs. Annikin Skywalker.
The debate started here.
I spent some time thinking about it...read more to see what I came up with...
January 22, 2002
Satan is my motor
Good morning, everyone.
Boy, I'm still getting used to the new Moveable Type interface. It's crazy. Cool, but crazy.
I just have a few announcements this morning:
1. Cake is playing a live concert on the internet, today. It starts at 11AM PST, which means I'll miss most of it, because I'll be on an audition.
2. I wrote another story for BBSpot a few weeks ago, and completely forgot to post about it here.
3. I saw this really cool story all about the history of video games, from 1889 to the present, at Gamespot.
4. I have some very exciting and fairly major news about some live shows that you can see me in, provided you're in Los Angeles. I'll make the announcement in the next few days.
5. Have you checked out the new crap^H^H^H^H cool stuff I added to the stores, just for Valentine's day? Can you think of a better way to tell your sweetie you love her than with a WFS box of candy? Mmmm...Classy!
Har.
6. I got an email over the weekend, that I am a pre-finalist for several Bloggies™, including best new weblog, and weblog of the year. Holy Crap! I've never really won anything, ever. So just being a pre-finalist (is that like being "pre-selected" by Ed McMahon for the publisher's clearing house thingy?) is pretty exciting to me. :)
Finally,I need to publicly thank forever_the_optimist for her patience. forever_the_optimist won the eBay auction of my Star Trek Lunchbox, and I've been so busy with work and family obligations, I haven't been able to properly sit down, sign the stuff, and send it. If I was forever_the_optimist, I'd be seriously stressed out at TVs Wil Wheaton, but she's been really cool and understanding. It will be signed and sent tonight. No more delays.
I'm off. I'm going to put myself together, and get ready for my audition.
Have a great day, everyone.